And now we will see why The Comedian was the Superhero most in tune with the real world.

Due to Resident Evil 5, there have been a HUGE amount of people speaking up in regards to whether or not it is racially inappropriate, and as our good friend Jim Sterling has mentioned, it has now hit mainstream television for all the weary parents and guardians to see and respectfully steer their children clear from it.

But who are we kidding people. Even if Capcom's latest offering of greatness was jam packed with racism, it honestly wouldn't bother me for two reasons...

1) The world is full of racism and the only reason everybody is having a bitch, is because they damn well know it and they can't stand the fact that our world may be portrayed to the younger masses as a bad place.

2) Negative press coverage is still Positive press coverage, and I am starting to believe that Capcom wanted this in order to give their game the best advertising campaign since Flight Simulators getting press coverage for 9-11.

When things like this happen I can't help but laugh. Because while everybody else in the world is pointing at video games, I am pointing at them. Not because I am a loyal, loving video game addict, but because I literally cannot stand the kind of place this world is turning out to be. And all one can really do is laugh about it all because as The Comedian says many times throughout Watchmen..."It's all a joke", and he wasn't wrong.

Instead of focusing on the game and what it may or may not subliminally encourage, I have decided to step over to the other side of the looking glass and focus on the world itself and why the gaming world is a reflection of it. Let's start from the bottom and work our way to the top, shall we...


8) Lust (aka. Excessive thoughts, acts and desires of a sexual nature)

Let's face it, sex makes the world go around. It is everywhere; it is legal and illegal with a fine line in between. The world will have people feel that if you are not having sex, you don't matter. If you are not getting off with somebody else, you are nothing. Sex has become very taken for granted, to the point where no matter what religious views a person would have, they are made to feel idiotic if it forbids the act of sex with somebody that doesn't mean anything to them emotionally. But who are we kidding, sex is amazing and if you haven't experienced it, I suggest you try it. Because it's not just the exchange of bodily fluids that makes sex a great experience...It's the power and satisfaction one gains through making somebody else feel the best they have ever felt, which is what causes us to be jealous if somebody can do it better (This is where dick size starts to matter).

Thanks to the act of reproduction without reproducing we have the following, flowing through the worlds bloodstream at an alarming rate: Abortions, Adultery (that’s Cheating for all you noobs), Rape, Pedophilia, Snuff and STD's (Bacterial, Viral and Fungal) creating something as small as a yeast infection to something as globally deforming as HIV.

For some unknown reason; in gaming, sex is viewed as more of a taboo than violence. It has always made me smirk in disgust when I have read or viewed in the news that a game has been taken off the shelves or been the center of focus for it's sexual content. From Leisure Suit Larry to GTA IV, it has been the focus of figure heads of power to point the finger at and blame for all the worlds sexual problems. My advice, discontinue contraception and shut down abortion clinics and watch the world go bat shit crazy. lol.


7) Gluttony (aka. The over-indulgence and over-consumption of anything to the point of waste)

Say hello to the worlds number one fault. As my friend DanMazkin once said "Anything to the point of excess, is dangerous". There has never been better advice to which the world could use because we as a collective, are extremely unresourceful in every single way and we are only getting to be worse in this as time passes. Anybody with a brain would know that half of the wars going on in the middle east these days are intervened by the UN in order to generate and disperse oil so that our over excessive selves can indulge in driving 300 meters down the road instead of walking, so we can unwind our car window and talk to a speaker box to obtain our daily dose of obesity from any shitty fast food 'restaurant' located on every corner.

This is a difficult characteristic of humanity to fit into the gaming world but it is evident in the way we excessively play certain games. World of Warcraft is a classic example. I have known people who consider their Guild and Ventrilo far greater things to have in life than a group of friends and a hang out spot. Which in my opinion is quite sad, but who am I to talk, I played Fallout 3 while my friends went to go see Between the Buried and Me at the Esplanade Hotel, and now I hate myself for it.


6) Greed (aka. disloyalty, deliberate betrayal, or treason especially for personal gain)

In order for a person to get above the people he is on the ground level with, they usually will have to step on their heads to get there. So is the usual way of the corporate world which controls the easily influenced population which completes the circle of greed. Greed is a direct result of gluttony, because over excess means that certain people will have to cater for it. Usually the individuals who feed off the consumers of the world, are people filled with Greed.

Apart from sex, money makes the world go around. But usually in this day and age you need money in order to obtain sex in one way or another. People will bend over backwards and get fucked 10 ways from Sunday in order to obtain money they need, and even more so for money they just want. Think about the average person working a 9 to 5 job they can't stand in order to get a slave check at the end of the week. This has become such an established part of normality that I have grown to hate the act of work, and not because of laziness, but because of the amount of souls being sold for leaving their dreams behind them, in darkness to pursue the typical American dream consisting of the usual wife, kids, house, car and the occasional holiday to keep the global economy level up. But necessity is necessity, and people need money.

Gaming is one of the few escapes for this kind of reality because it puts you in a fictional life for a small amount of time...but even games come with a price tag.


5) Sloth (aka. Laziness or indifference, of an unwillingness to act, an unwillingness to care)

Man kind, since the dawn of time, has always wanted everything while having to do nothing and YOU are no exception. If you won the lottery, would you still work the job you can't stand in order to sustain the life you need? If you were to say yes, I would personally come over to you and slap you in the face...with my penis.

Fair enough, the Wii has made it so we don't have to sit on our arses to enjoy a decent game. But in all honesty, if I wanted to play tennis or go bowling...I fucken would. Face it, nothing is better than having nothing to do except for sitting down with a brand new, awesome game and sinking into it for a day which is exactly what I did all weekend because I am trying to quit smoking for the 13th time and I know that if I go out and have a social life, smoking will follow hand in hand.

Fair enough, Skate 2 is an awesome skate simulator, but get the fuck off the couch once in a while and go and skate. Ok, so you can't do a variel heelflip 180 to a 50-50 grind to a 360 shove it, in real life. But who the fuck cares, at least you are actually on a damn skateboard, losing calories instead of gaining them.


4) Wrath (aka. inordinate and uncontrolled feelings of hatred and anger)

Hypothetical situation: You are driving on the freeway, somebody cuts you off, you beep your horn, they stick their middle finger up at you through the window, you have a gun in your glove compartment...what do you do? Maybe scare them a little by pointing it at them, teach them a lesson? No? ... It is a classic example of If it's there, you are going to use it.

For most of us, there is a little voice in our heads that if we think of something unfathomable such shooting somebody on the freeway, it says: Uh ah, not a good idea, shooting somebody in a 100 km an hour moving vehicle on a busy freeway...is counter-productive! However, everybody has their cut off limit where this voice is blocked out by the sweet sounds of personal vengeance and fury. For the most part violence has a lot to do and is overlooked within the world and therefore within gaming. Violent acts are usually only outlawed if they are performed by somebody outside of the law but those people of higher power and the law will have you think otherwise while they are pushing the buttons and making the phone calls which send in troops, start the electric chairs and of course mass produce and ship weaponry which ends up finding its way to the highest bidder in a third world country to start a 'revolution' and become the new war lord.

I honestly belief that violence is the most overlooked area of gaming because it is the most overlooked area of the planet. Yet, it seems that the moment their is an aspect of violence in a game that does not fit into the stereotypically correct use of violence (eg. Being an American soldier stabbing an Israeli in the back with a combat knife, as seen in CoD4) and decides to hint at other animalistic, senseless and inhuman acts of violence (eg. Shooting a virus ridden African zombie in the face with a shotgun), the powers that be as well as the press in all forms, are crapping all over it. Which I find hilarious because to me; stabbing an Israeli in the back with a combat knife is a more realistic and inhuman act of violence than killing a zombie that is about to eat your face off. It makes me wonder if Infinity Ward was to bring out a war game where the single player campaign focused on the Israeli blowing up and killing America and its inhabitants in the name of their country and God, would it live long enough to see daylight? I would suspect not.

If you want my personal and more abusive view of violence in video games check out: Video games - Making kids kill since 1999


3) Envy (aka. The love of one's own good perverted to a desire to deprive other men of theirs)

We have all been envious of somebody for whatever reason it may be. Wanting to have the life of somebody else while wishing that somebody else didn't have what makes them better than you (in your eyes). Classic example of this is comparing your Xbox 360 Gamerscore with all your friends to see who it is you need to beat in which game because having a bigger gamer score proves you are a better gamer.

Summed up short, it's dick measuring. And you being pissed off if you don't come out the bigger of the two. The world (especially America), is a big player when it comes to Bigger is better. If one country has something the other doesn't, either get it or make something better. The race to get to the moon is a classic example between Russia and America during the Cold War, which brought forth Rocky IV where Stallone VS Dulph Laundry...or something.

The world has become so good at converting envious tendencies, that they no longer seem like envious endeavors and instead seem like tests of sportsmanship. The Olympic Games is a classic global cock measuring competition which shows that the more people for the country, the more gold medals they have. If you want proof that bigger is not always better, talk to my friend who has a huge dick and can't have sex with half the chicks he picks up because it hurts them too much. So be happy with what you have and at least be grateful that you can get an erection...unlike me...*sniff*.


2) Pride (aka. The Desire to be more important or attractive than others)

Classic example of pride is straight before a multiplayer match of any kind, you come across the player who will go on and on about how he is going to bury your head under his shit and get his team to rape your arse. He is also the player that will crack the shits if you and your team end up molesting him and his team to the point where they will leave directly after trying to gain some of their former glory by insulting you and your mother before finding another match.

Pride is something will all have in different levels. It is acceptable if one is humble about how they display it, however most people, especially in gaming, have no idea how to be humble. In any competition, pride will immerge. It is the most humorous of all the faults of man because it can be crushed easily. And when it is crushed, it adds to the pride of whoever it was that crushes their opponents, causing a never ending cycle which is fucken hilarious.

1) Humans (aka. The most destructive and disrespectful species on planet earth)

See...now, with me. I hate you unless I know you. Because you are all part of that collective which keeps the Earth rotating into a spiral of shit. I look at a beautiful sunset and say, "Fuck...night is going to be here soon, the fuckheads are going to come out in masses, drinking their cans of confidence, snorting their fun dust and walking the streets in packs of horny morons with their chests sticking outward and slaggy hags doing the same"...

However the people I choose to be around and interact with (both physically and digitally), are the best things life has to offer to another. And I am sure you have your group of friends that you believe that to be true about them. Which brings me to my point, which may sound clichéd and corny as fuck...but here it is: We are all connected in one way or another, I know my friends who know their other friends who know their other friends...and so on. If this is the case, you would think that we could stop the petty shit and have some fun without letting any of the things I stated above, impact it for the worse. But the truth is humanity has always been the same in its worst aspects and is ever changing in its best aspects.

In truth, I don't blame most parents and authority figures for being rejective to most types of mature gaming because it is just a too true depiction of what life really can be like at its worst, and most people just like to stay behind their little version of life and pretend the bad parts of the world are far away from them. When in reality it is just around the corner. And because I know that, I have no problem seeing the humor and fun to be had in gaming, its just a shame everybody else takes it so seriously when they should be taking the world around them a hell of a lot more seriously instead.



P.S - Happy Birthday Destructoid. You allow me to express myself to a community that listens and has common interests. And for that I am grateful. Thank you.