I want to start doing this every weekend. Let's take over the front page! "Dtoid Community Weekends." Help me make it happen.
Go create something beautiful. Or awful. Or hilarious. Or insightful. I don't care what. Just go create.
Have I missed something of yours recently? I couldn't be more sorry. Please never hesitate to email me a link; you'd be surprised how many blogs hit the front page just because someone bugged me about them.
"Also, cocks" is gone. The "Fap" button is gone. Chad, Colette, Brad, Samit, Uncle Reg, and every other person and thing you've ever loved is gone. And it's safe to say none of them are coming back.
But Dtoid is not gone. We're right fucking here. There may be some new writers on the front page and new usernames in the comments and blogs, but the heart and soul of this place lives on as long as Yanier Gonzalez is still pushing buttons behind the scenes and sometimes also breaking things but it's OK because we love you boss please don't fire me.
At one point, you were new here and you didn't know anybody. And then eventually you knew everybody. And then either you or everybody you knew left and now there's all these new people and it sucks. I get it. I really do. Things change. Sometimes that's scary. When your favorite commenters, bloggers, or writers leave, something irreplaceable is lost that no amount of new people can ever replace. It sucks. And there's nothing we can do about it.
Or is there? People may come and go, but it's up to those of us who stay behind to adapt and keep this place as fun and active a community full of fun and active people as we can. It's up to us.
So you say you wanna start having fun again? Then fucking start having fun again. The Cblogs are yours. The comments are yours. What's the fucking problem?
There's no denying that this industry is changing. "Maturing," some might say. (I wouldn't.) Yes, serious topics like sex and race are going to be discussed. Yes, people you don't agree with are going to be interviewed. That's just an inevitability as more and more people becoming interested in our hobby, and it's not going to change. But these are still videogames, and they're still meant to be fun. But they're only going to be as fun as we want them to be.
I'm not advocating turning "serious" articles into dumping grounds for your random gifs. Let the people who like talking about such things have their forums; it literally DOES NOT AFFECT YOU THAT SUCH THINGS EXIST. But when a boring or questionable news article gets posted, it's OK to fill it with images of people eating salad. Failblogs are great places to sing Journey songs together. Slow day in the Cblogs? Write a silly blog. Start a silly meme. Potatoes. Mazmar. Whatever. Do fun things. This isn't a license to be a fucking asshole, just a reassurance that neither I nor anyone under my authority will stand in your way of just having a good, lighthearted time.
I don't mod comments or blogs for being off-topic; if I did, this guy would have been banned years ago. I mod comments when the person who wrote them is being a fucking asshole. So don't be a fucking asshole and we'll never treat you like one. It's OK to disagree with people, and it's OK to say as much. But it's not now and never has been OK to treat people like shit, and anyone who misses "the good old days" where they could was never a true Dtoider to begin with.
Anyway, that's all I have to say on the matter. I'm going to go masturbate on the toilet now.
If you're going to PAX this weekend, you owe it to yourself to take the new Mr Destructoid helmet for a spin! This thing is ULTRA light (you seriously have to wear it to believe it) and you will have a BLAST walking around the convention with it!
After seeing the Mega Man Maker (part of our Golden Archives) up on the front page again, it got me thinking: what's your favorite thing Dtoid ever did?
The Dtoid staff and community have come up with some fantastic "stuff" over the past seven years or so, but my personal highlight was probably the "real Dead Island experience" video our old Editor in Chief Nick Chester put together a couple years back.
Don't remember it? Here:
Now, I may be a little bias because of what happens at about the 2:40 mark (hint: that's my kid), but that video was just simple, lighthearted fun, and every time I think about it I smile.
HOLY SHIT PAX IS NEXT WEEK!! We get a lot of questions about avatar adoption around this time every year -- namely, "What the fuck is avatar adoption?!" -- so I've put together a quick FAQ for those of you unfamiliar with this long-standing Dtoid tradition. This literally affects EVERY Dtoider -- yes, even you! -- so please read on to see how you can get involved!
What the fuck is PAX avatar adoption?!
Sadly, not every Dtoider gets to attend PAX. Whether they live too far away, don't have the funds for the trip, or simply can't escape for the weekend, dozens (maybe billions!) of your internet friends will never know the joy of playing videogames in the rain (because Seattle).
For these poor souls, we have the PAX Adopt-an-Avatar program! By harnessing the power of paper and ink, adoptees are able to vicariously enjoy the glory that is PAX no matter what their situation! Their avatars will mingle with Internet celebrities, wrap their thin, papery hands around the hottest new releases and upcoming games, and drown their pulpy livers in drink with the Dtoid staff and community (avatars must be 21-or-older to imbibe alcohol). Pretty neat!
So how does it work? It's pretty simple, really...
I can't make it to PAX. How do I get my avatar adopted?
All you have to do is ask! If you're unable to attend but love the idea of living vicariously through one of your Dtoid compatriots, just post a blog here in the Cblogs or start a thread over in the Forums detailing why yours is an avatar worth adopting! Then, assuming a loving parent-to-be comes along and offers you a new home, you'll provide them with a high-resolution copy of your avatar (something that will look good printed out) and cross your fingers that they'll love you like their own!
The level of involvement and creativity is different for each "parent", but here are some possibilities:
You'll be in a lot of pictures.
This one is pretty much a given. Adopting an avatar is a great excuse for people to bug Internet celebrities for their picture. "Hey, you're famous internet celebrity Jonathan Holmes! Could I take my picture with you? You know... for the avatar?"
You'll see said pictures in a recap blog or forum post.
Again, this one is pretty much a given. Half the fun of adopting an avatar comes with recapping the events of the weekend in a post-PAX post for all of Dtoid to see. (Here's an example of one I particularly enjoyed. Individual results may vary!)
Other things might happen.
WHO KNOWS?! The only guarantee is that everyone involved will have a blast!
I'm going to PAX, and I really want to adopt so-and-so's avatar. What do I do?
Tell them! Just send them a PM and work out the details! Then, once you're both on the same page, simply print out a copy of their avatar and bring it with you to PAX! Take them with you everywhere you go, and try to be as creative as possible... but most of all, HAVE FUN!
And that's all there is to it! If you have any further questions just ask here in the comments. And for those of you unable to attend PAX and want your avatar adopted... WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! Your would-be-parent is waiting!