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Monkey News's blog

8:53 AM on 12.31.2014

PSN tags?

Hello Dtoiders, long time no speak. I have recently aqquired a PS4 so anyone who fanices adding me please do for mega fun sexy time. 



3:26 PM on 11.06.2012

So... I won the Wii U!

Out of the 1000 people upvoted to be entered into the competition, I, somehow, came out on top. And seriously, I'm almost positive some mistake has been made, because I just don't win things (apart from the dance competition i was entered into when I was 6). For example, when I was 14 I was an avid chess player, and participated in many tournaments. During one of these events, I cheated to ensure my progression to the next round by distracting my opponent and moving his king into a place where i could have him in 3-4 moves.

I still lost.

I haven't been a member of this site for what would be considered a long time (just over a year perhaps?), but it seriously is the only place I go to for my gaming news. Mainly due to the fact that I'm incredibly lazy, but also due to the great community and honest opinions. It seriously is the best gaming site around, and i was in no way paid with the Wii U to say these nice things. Honest.

The last Nintendo console i owned was the Gamecube, but the last Nintendo console I loved (and still own) is the N64. So many great memories with that beauty of a machine. I pray for the day they release a new B&K that isn't about building vehicles. But, as rare no longer works for Ninty, it shan't be on the Wii U, which is a massive shame.

But back to the point, I cant wait to get away from the onslaught of FPS that i normally play, and get back to some sexy Mario action. And not to forget ZombiU, it seriously looks and sounds like the zombie game i have been waiting for forever.

So, as a closing statement I would just like to thank Dtoid for gifting me with this, for all the people who upvoted my mostly terrible comments, and a special thank you to our fuzzy faced mod, Mr Andy Dixon, for pestering me enough that i actually looked at my emails and noticed that I'd won!

Oh, and i thought you would at least like to see the mug of the guy you (yes, you) helped to win, so here i am. On the left. With my special looking friend.

Edit: After actually reading the competition rules, I have spotted that I will actually be receiving the cash equivalent, and will have to go out and buy my own Wii U, which i am utterly disgraced by and refuse to do.   read

7:28 AM on 09.26.2012

Borderlands 2 Players ps3

Not so much a blog as a simple message, if anyone has BL2 on ps3 and wants to have many fun adventures add me on MonkeyNews08, as currently i end up getting matched with a bunch of 11 year olds. Thanks!   read

2:27 PM on 03.31.2011

Monkey views : Me vs GAMES ARE IMPORTANT

Recently there has been more and more pressure on the argument of games being art, with no real conclusion. What it seems to come down to, much like most forms of art, is the individual. If i were to be shown around a art gallery, it would be pointless. It wouldn't evoke any type of emotion, while to others a mixture of red and green paint would bring back a distant childhood memory....or something. Anyway im drifting, but what i plan to talk about today is the effect games have on our lives, how they can mold and shape you into the person you are or will become.

See i never took games seriously. They were fun, thats about as deep as it got. As a kid, i was lucky enough to have most consoles, starting from around the age of 5, my first being the genesis, and with that obviously came Sonic. Then, the N64. Then the Ps1. You get the picture. A few weeks ago i was playing dead space 2. Now i hate to bring the tone down here, but once again my parents were arguing, and i was ignoring them. Like i had done for the past 8 years. But, unfortunatly, this time was the nail in the coffin, and they are getting divorced soon.

Now that doesnt worry me, i always expected this to happen. It was just a matter of time. But as i sat there, shooting limbs off necromorphs, it shocked me that i didnt care. I had no urge to get up and try to stop this. My sister and brother were both downstairs pleading with my parents, while i was in my room, completly seperated. I felt like shit, what gives me the right to do this? Then i started to think, looking back on my life and how games had helped me through these times when i was younger. When i could hear them going at it, i would go into my room, turn on my console at the time and become absorbed. I was oblivious to what was happening, i was literally sucked into games. Some may say that i became more detached from reliality, taking escapism to a unhealthy level. Fuck that. How messed would i have been if i was subjected to my parents shit whilst seeing it.....

It made me realise why i had such a love for particular games. Sure, the fact that they were good games helped, but they...without sounding too cliche....were there for me.

Now i dont want this post to turn into a 'aw bad luck man' pile of shit, i want to hear personal stories, people that have been changed or effected by games, in a negative or positive way. Why are games important? You tell me.   read

2:36 PM on 09.23.2010

Monkey Views: Electricity Vs Me

So currently i have been disabled for electricity. The only way im able to use my laptop is by taking it to work with me. I dont look out of place at all, sat there in a building site with a laptop. It honestly makes me question my manhood, while im scooping some gaming news, the 5 men next to me are reading Playboy while spitting on the floor, doing weights and smoking.

But anyway thats not the point of this preety useless blog. I just wanted to talk about how shocking (electric pun no.1) my daily routine has become with the absence of elecricity. Dont ask me why, but im sure working from 5 in the morning till 6 at night, then going home and watching your family play board games from a distance (me and board games dont go) has driven me slightly insane.

Speaking of which, the last 4 days i have had to wake up at stupid o'clock, and attempt to get prepaid for work in the pitch black. So many injuries. I actually fell down the stairs lastnight, and it hurt way more than i remember. But this blog post isnt about personal injuries or the accidental death of my 2 month old kitten, its about what the evil electricians have done to my gaming capabilities. Which is basically crippled them. The only game i have played in the past four days is solataire, and i am terrible at it. Its almost as if i have been unplugged from the gaming world (electric pun no.2). It depresses me evn more that (i think) the new norderlands dlc is out in England today, yet i am unable to persue my love for the game.

Im disconnected from all my online chums and pals, i have had to cram all the destructoid goodness from the last few days in a one hour dinner break. When i am back and fully functioning, i have a idea for a post which has been praying on my mind for a while. But it needs some serious graft put into it. Until then, chow!!!!   read

5:47 PM on 09.15.2010

Monkey Views: Come Over To The Darkside

It never, ever seemed to bother me, since the day i bought my PS3 i was fine with it. I mean to start off with i had a 360. Then another. Then another. Finally it pissed me off so much that i decided to try out sony's black box, and never looked back. It was also the first console i got online (couldnt get the 360 hooked up, dont know why...). Now i really wasnt that bothered that about 98% of my friends who did play games, had a 360. Even those with both always went with the 360. At my tender age of 18, everyone is leaving and saying there fairwells as people head off around the country to different univeristys. Everyone but me.

I mean this story really is just a way of venting how sad i will be when everyone leaves, but the most annoying thing is people will still be connected via Xbox live. No one who is going away owns a ps3. But it just makes me wonder.....why? Why does everyone opt for the 360? What makes it so much better? Having never had xbox live (although i have played on it) i cant slate it and claim that pS3 iZ LoaWds BetTEr, but i mean what does it bring extra that the ps3 doesnt, apart from a 45 price tag? I here people claim that the community is better, that its a smoother experience etc, but i always it worth 45? I dont actually know, but my view from what little i have played is that it isnt. For me, my current job is hardly placing me in a awesome finacial position, and that extra 45 could get me a new game, clothes or a good night out.

So with that in mind i dont see why more people dont play ps3. I mean i have seen the odd major fanboy on this site during my short time....wont mention any names *coughSexualChocolatecough*, but the majority seem to be 360 players. Sure, before the price drop a 360 was the obvious choice, but now ps3's are moderatly priced, and have a slightly better games library than before, i just dont get the view of it. Mabye its just my friends. Mabye it goes wider. What do you think, wonderfull community of destructoid?

By the way, in no way was this artice ment to be bias, troll baiting, flame baiting, racist, sexist, midgitist, hurtfull, spitefull or downright awful

Just come to the darkside. Ill pay you.   read

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