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About Me

Hellos to all strangers who have clicked on to my blog! Name is Jade,like everyone else on Destructoid I love video games, also anime too. My taste in video games varies, I love RPGs,adventure,platformers,RTS and some fighting games. My favorite game of all time is Okami.I would also like to see Threads of Fate 2 made and even Klonoa games, since I had some good memories with those games.Well if you wanna know more about me don't be afraid to ask ^_^!

What else...OH I live in NYC however...I hate living in Queens, but I still love Brooklyn the BEST :D! I was born on July 4th and I've been a gamer since 1994 thanks to my brother <3!I'm currently studying to become a preschool teacher too. Personally there is something about video games I just really love about and I kind of see it like going inside a interactive book that you're playing.

Games I'm currently playing:
Valkyria Chronicles
Mario&Luigi RPG 3
Assassin's Creed 1

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Can't A Gamer Find Love?
MellowBunny | 8:17 AM on 08.04.2009 16 comments


Sigh....it sucks to be single with all your friends in relationships already. Ever since my last relationship I've always wondered if similar interests really matter in a relationship or not. I mean you hear that saying "Opposites attract" and I think that saying sucks personally. My best friends Ryan and Sammi have been dating for months and they always say they don't have much in common, but I think that's bullshit. They have more in common than they think! That's the funny thing about them. I know I shouldn't have a "check list" when it comes to finding a boyfriend, but from past experiences I want to meet someone who has similar interests as me.

My last relationship with my ex-boyfriend was such fail. We dated for a few months last year and everything was fine till he started to criticizing me about playing video games and watching anime. It was more that he had a problem with me playing video games than anything else. He thought playing video games made me more of a tomboy and also the fact of not wearing make-up added to my "tomboyness". Granted I dress pretty normal for a girl and not really in baggy clothing at all. So to me I really didn't see what was wrong with the way I dressed.

So few months later like around the beginning of the last fall semester I broke up with him because I couldn't take the fact that he was just dating me for two reasons: 1. getting me out video games and 2. changing me into more of a girly girl type of person. So after finding out of those were his reasons I pretty much said to him "Go fuck yourself ^__^!" and I never spoke to him after that. I mean why date a person just to change them? If you don't like how the person is then break up with them. Don't try to change something you can't fix. Besides anyone who tries to get me out of gaming is swimming in dangerous waters.

My friends have said to me OVER and OVER that finding a boyfriend who loves video games is really easy. Easy my ass! If anything it's pretty hard to find other gamers and even at my college there aren't many who really are interested in video games. After my last relationship I want to look for someone who is interested in video games like me and understands my love for them. I know it's just a hobby, but it's a hobby I love a lot and grew up with.

I wrote something like this on Kotaku and people were quite helpful in my question ^_^. I would've wrote a question like this on the forums, but I know it would start some long page thread. Overall I'm wondering if common interests really matter in any relationship?



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15 comments | showing # 1 to 15
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Jonathan Holmes's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 10:25
Jonathan Holmes
In my experience, finding someone who relates with your hobbies, especially is it's a "geek" hobby like gaming is pretty important. That goes double if you're under 25, when social categories like "nerd" and "jock" still have some weight.

Some of the happiest couples I know share a love of videogames, or at least, can partial involve themselves with their SO's interest in medium. The only thing I'd be careful of the people that will date you just for your videogames. I've had two different girlfriends who eventually told me that they were more into Animal Crossing than the were into me.

With guys, I'd imagine the risk of that scenario may be even greater.
Deathofthedead's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 10:49
Deathofthedead
When I worked at a game store, all I heard from guys (coworkers, customers, everybody) was how much they'd love to have a gamer girlfriend.

So, my advice: spend some time hanging out at a local game store. Sure, some of the guys there are probably pretty pathetic, but there's bound to be a few good guys who would love the chance to get to know a girl who knows games.
Bulkmailer's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 10:52
Bulkmailer
My bad, seems you've been here long enough to be well aware of groups. Common interest don't really matter, as long as a couple has similar goals in progressing through life in general.
nilcam's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 10:58
nilcam
My wife is a geek. I find that it helps if you date someone who is open to video gaming and tends to gravitate toward geek culture - comics, videogames, anime, technology, etc. It's very important to have a lot in common with your partner. Opposites attract for a short time; eventually, strong differences will affect the relationship. Finding someone with whom you have common interests but is not exactly into the same things is good.
Prince Ghidorah's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 11:25
Prince Ghidorah
I'm in the same situation as Nilcam; my wife is a geek. She kicks my ass at fighting games, the most make-up I've ever seen her wearing is a dab of lipstick, she doesn't dress or act like a girly-girl, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I hate to repeat what your friends have told you over and over, but there are plenty of good-hearted nerdy guys out there whose hearts go pitter-pat at the very thought of a girl who is into geek culture. Trust me, they're out there...you've just got to find the right one. That might not be easy, but the good news is that you did the right thing in kicking that boyfriend of yours to the curb. It may be cliche, but if he didn't appreciate you for the tomboy gamer-girl that you are, then he didn't deserve you. Now that he isn't wasting your time you can go out and find someone who does. Good luck :-)
Primo's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 11:34
Primo
My girlfriend isn't into gaming (we have a lot of other common interests). It can kind of suck at times especially when I'm just in the mood to play a game. She did get kind of in to watching me play Bioshock which was cool.
Samuel Dillinger's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 11:46
Samuel Dillinger
Gaming isnt the only thing you will need to have in common to create and sustain a healthy relationship.

You need to find middle ground and even after you find it, it is incredibly hard to keep it at that level.

Take my advice, because this is the best advice I was given and it worked:

Np body else is going to be happy with you if you are not happy with yourself. My girlfriend and I have different interests when it comes to gaming. She accepts it, but doesnt love it. And I accept shit like Twilight, but I don't love that either.

Still, I love and respect her and you will find that trivial shit like gaming has nothing to do with keeping a healthy relationship. In the end, it is all about compatibility
Tino's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 12:13
Tino
You know, I was singing this exact tune probably 3 months ago and recently struck gold (thanks to Dtoid New York actually.)

Just, keep your eyes open and don't settle. Get something you actually want. And if times get tough and you start to feel sad about being alone, a strong friendships and a group of people to hang out with helps so much.

Be sure to come out to the next Dtoid NY group. Were good people and we will help you forget your worries.
Tino's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 12:15
Tino
Also, a heads up. Next time were getting together is the night of the 21st and during the day of the 22nd.
FatherChesz's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 12:47
FatherChesz
With my ex I always felt we were missing something. She'd try to play video games, but anything beyond Lego Star Wars pretty much ended in disaster. I don't think she really enjoyed any of it, and it's difficult to share an experience when you both aren't really "in" it.

Around these parts, it's pretty tough to find a girl worth a damn, let alone one that gives a damn about games. We're a bit short on arcades and gaming hangouts, and I don't think I've ever seen a girl in GameStop, other than a mom buying her kid some crappy movie game. I'll never give up hope, even after I've given up.
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 13:37
Elsa
... common interests aren't as important as common respect and no desire to change the person. My husband loved to rebuild old cars... I know nothing about cars and have no desire to learn - and while he rebuilt old cars, I had time for gaming.

Common interests help a relationship... but common respect and love for the other person as they are is the basis for a long lasting relationship in my opinion.
CelicaCrazed's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 14:06
CelicaCrazed
Eh don't worry and just try to have fun for now. You can't force love, it'll come naturally. But I'm sure you'll find it ^_^
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 14:33
Sharpless
*gets emo*

*kills self*

...

That is, I can identify. But yeah, come to one of our DtoidNY events and you'll probably be drunk and hooking up in the bathroom in no time. That's a relationship, right?
Tino's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/04/2009 18:21
Tino
Sharpless just because we took advantage of you doesn't mean we will take advantage of everyone else.
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