Though Goombas and Koopa Troopas form the backbone of Bowser's army, in today's world it's obvious that the world's mightiest militaries rely on the strength of their air force.

Enter Lakitu.

Lakitu may not be the first Mario baddie to pop into your head, but he's appeared in far more games than you probably remember, and not always as a villian either. That's why this week's I AM ERROR is celebrating our cloud-riding, Spiny-throwing friend, Lakitu.

Since the time he was a young reptile, Lakitu always seemed to have his head in the clouds. Literally. His strange ability to control the weather landed him a heavy conscription bonus when he was forced into service in the Koopa Troop. He quickly rose through the ranks, and was given command of a regiment of Spinies. Not really, having any military experience, Lakitu decided to use his command of the clouds to launch an aerial assault on the invading plumber, dropping his troops into battle. This proved ineffective though, and Bowser was defeated. Lakitu continued in his role as bombardier until his tour of duty ended and he retired from active duty to take up fishing.

Of course, even in retirement, Lakitu had to keep busy, and fishing wasn't nearly enough to fill his days. One day while cleaning out his basement, he found an old video camera. He called up his brother, and asked him if he would be interested in making a film. In discussing what the subject of their film should be, they finally settled on a documentary about their former nemesis, Mario. They found him just in time to film his entire quest for the Power Stars. The Lakitu Brothers' film, Mario 64: Plumbers Go Wild, won the Golden Tanooki Award for Best Documentary Film at the Mushroom Academy Film Festival that year. The brothers made two more independent films, Warp Pipe Dreams and The Goomba Whisperer, though niether was nearly as successful.



Though his brother stayed in the movie business, Lakitu grew restless, and used his share of the profits to build a go-kart track. The business was wildly successful, and through the help of an anonymous mustachioed business partner, more tracks were built across the Mushroom Kingdom. The Mario Kart empire had been born. In his time running Mario Kart Raceways, Lakitu held numerous competitions, which drew the best kart racers from all over the kingdom. And despite being so profitable, Lakitu insisted on doing all the work at the track himself, from maintaining the tracks to holding the stoplight to start the race and fishing racers out of the water when they crashed.

After a few years, Lakitu felt it was time to move on again. He used his contacts in the sports entertainment industry to get him a job as a referee. Though he began officiating only tennis games, he soon moved to baseball, golf, and even the Olympics.

Lakitu's family is widely influential in the Mushroom Kingdom, owning a variety of key businesses. For example, his brother later followed Lakitu out of the movie business and established Lakitu Travel. His cousin Lakilester (aka, Spike) even fought alongside Mario for a time.

But today we celebrate this single cloud-riding phenomenon; he has brought us all so much, and we appreciate him so little. Let's hear it... for Lakitu! Submit you suggestions for other minor characters that need recognition in the comments.

And now, a video of Lakitu beating Evil Ryu, Evil Ken, and some other dude.



Past Episodes:
I AM ERROR #1: Error