Hi, Nintendo. My Internet name is MaxVest. And I want to let you in on a little secret: I enjoyed Wii Sports. It's true! Sure, I've got your core franchises for Wii like Mario Galaxy, Metroid Prime 3, and Zelda: Twilight Princess. And, although you didn't develop it, I just blew up some zombie heads in Resident Evil 4 for the first time.

But where the devil is Wii Sports 2?


Real leaked logo. Honest.

All those core games? They're great. But do you notice anything about those? There's a lot of single player on that list. Now, I'm not even going to touch your online strategy for Wii so far. When your 3-year-old handheld has a vastly superior online experience to your one-year-old console, something's not quite right. Suffice it to say that sometimes I like social gaming, and your core franchises don't have it yet, player-2-wiimote-star-gathering notwithstanding.

So what are your local multiplayer offerings? WarioWare (thanks for making me unlock multiplayer), Mario Party 8, Big Brain Academy, Wii Sports. Now let's pick the one that most appeals to a room of varied adults. Not so fast, Nintendo! Remember that I'm writing this from an American perspective. And do you know how Americans feel about kawaii? It ranges from mildly pleased to slightly embarrassed. I'm not passing judgment, just relaying information.

Wii Sports also makes some of the best use of the wiimote. Sure, wiimote aiming in MP3 is a nice change of pace... for the 600K North Americans who bought it. That's an 8% attach rate. No prizes for guessing what the attach rate of Wii Sports is in North America. Or for guessing what most Wii ads show people playing.

Apparently, however, making Wii Sports 2 would be too easy. From Earthbound and Mother creator Shigesato Itoi's blog Hobo Nikkan Itoi Shinbun, chronicling his conversations with Nintendo President Satoru Iwata:

Itoi: It's probably the traditional way to release a sequel, but I suppose Nintendo isn't planning to do that. Maybe a sequel may be released sometime in the future, but probably not soon, and probably not by simply adding a couple of new sports.

Iwata: We're not going to take such an easy way, not by including seven new sports in the game since Wii Sports has five. We're not closing our doors to the possibility of a sequel, but it's definitely not coming out soon.

Itoi: The contents will be so predictable if it came out soon.

I realize this is part of your ploy, Nintendo. With the Wii selling out of stock in North America, you're saving this little money-printer for a rainy day when Wii hits a rough patch. When people are paying an average of $650 for a Wii, though, they're going to be dissatisfied with just Wii Sports. And once these casual gamers write Wii off as a poor investment, they might never buy anything for it again.

So get cracking. Deliver on the promise of motion sensing. Third parties seem to be struggling with this, so show them how it's done. And don't forget to show the Canadians some curling love. Think how cute you could make the curling stone! It practically looks like a Square-Enix character already:


Awwwwwwww.....

With Inappropriate Love,
MaxVest

(Because Snaileb did one)