I made this a short while back, but I figured I'd share my thoughts on Resident Evil 5 with you guys for fun, considering it's near release. Enjoy!




Resident Evil 5 has had its fair share of controversy. In addition to Xbox gamers taking issue with its outdated control system, a small fraction gaming community also claims that it is racist. Thought to be racist long ago when it was first revealed that the location of the game was in Africa, angry mobs subsided for about a year with no apparent reason. Recently, Eurogamer has re-ignited the racism controversy in Resident Evil 5. Fear not readers, this is nothing new: Resident Evil has always been racist.



Resident Evil hates Hispanics



Every Hispanic “protagonist” found in the Resident Evil series dies a terrible death. Compound this is the fact that every enemy in Resident Evil 4 is Hispanic. When Leon Kennedy isn’t busy rescuing the American president’s daughter, he’s supporting America’s “hidden agenda”. The enemies, called “Ganados” (racist) hail from Spain, but they sound stereo-typically Mexican. Is this because Capcom didn’t understand the difference between the two nations, or is this the work of an even darker force? If this isn’t Bush-era propaganda, I don’t know what is.



Resident Evil hates animals




What did a wild pack of dogs say when Umbrella corp. injected them with a virus, turning them into rabid zombified versions of their previous selves? Dogs can’t talk: but if they could, they probably wouldn’t like it. These poor defenseless pooches were rounded up one day and turned into killing machines because Capcom felt like it. But Resident Evil doesn’t stop at dog murder; you also must euthanize crows, snakes, worms, and crocodiles. One area of Resident Evil 3 even requires a killing spree in a local Zoo. There hasn’t been this much human-on-dog violence since the un-aired Scooby-Doo episode. Even then, this is probably worse.



Resident Evil hates Religious folk



Practice religion around the protagonists of Resident Evil? You’ll probably end up being blown to bits by a Rocket Launcher. One entire level in Resident Evil 4 is in a monastery: apparently, religion in enclosed spaces makes you hostile. Religious folk also evidently love hording tons of gold and machine guns in their holy haven of death. Japan is a nation known for it’s agnosticism and all around God-less-ness: Coincidence?

Resident Evil? More like Resident Atheists.



Resident Evil hates Germans



Capcom goes out on a limb for this one. Not only is the sole German character in any Resident Evil a villain (didn’t see that one coming), but his name is also just as ridiculous: Krauser. If that name doesn’t invoke World War II-Era hatred, I don’t know what will. Krauser spends the entire game hunting the profilic hero with a knife and a bow. The Japanese are no stranger to making Germans named Krauser maniacally evil (see WolfGang Krauser). Oh; he’s also parasitic. Double entendre, Capcom?



Resident Evil poorly portrays Cyborgs (racist)



Yes, Resident Evil has a cyborg character. Did you know that? Apparently Wesker underwent some “changes” after the first game, and now has super-human abilities much like the Governator’s most popular film character. There aren’t many cyborgs walking the earth these days, and apparently one of the few that exists loves to beat women more than James Brown. Yep, you heard that right. In the above scene, Wesker proceeds to beat Claire into a pulp for no apparent reason. He’s also prone to double crossing, blackmail, and murderous rampages. Albert Wesker: Abusive Cyborg? Or just mis-represented?


Resident Evil hates Women



As mentioned above, most of the main villains in Resident Evil beat women. Many other famous stars have beaten women: James Brown, Ike Turner, and now, Resident Evil 3’s Nemesis. Nemesis stalks Jill Valentine at every turn, and slaps her every time he sees her. In fact, his mission is to kill all STARS Special Forces members, but in actualilty he seems to just like smacking around “the weaker sex”.


Resident Evil hates White People



Finally, Resident Evil hates white people. It was bad enough that the Caucasian Cachaemic Crew were the villains of not only Resident Evil 1, 2 and 3, but they were also recently seen in Resident Evil Zero. In fact, every Resident Evil game but two of them has white villains. Apparently, everyone who lives in a Mansion has to be White, and dress terribly (this is not only racist but economically insensitive).

So there you have it. Resident Evil: Survival Horror? Or Horribly Racist? You decide.


Due to kooky formatting; click the pics below for a better look at them. See you all online in Mercs ;I call Wesker!