Good evening ladies, gentlemen, and miscellaneous undefined variables within human gender and sexuality! I am Luftwaffles. Yes, the name is not strikingly original, but it was my favorite moniker while playing Day of Defeat (a game that was once my religion) back in high school and sort of stuck around like lint on your favorite afghan. The blanket, not the people. I'm no racist. In fact, it was the brave first post of Zombielifecoach that encouraged me to finally blog. I was originally going to title this post: "T-Rex and Jets" hoping to pique the interest of the community, but could not for the life of me decide on whether T-Rex was the proper plural for Tyrannosaurus Rex. Is it like fish? Does one refer to a pack of T-Rex as "look at that group of T-Rex?" Or is it T-Rex's? T-Rex's and Jets failed to maintain the same rhyme scheme. Alas, I digress into the black hole of English language. Continuing on...
Although I may not have realized it years ago, it was perhaps fate that I would come to thoroughly enjoy this website and its inhabitants. Pure lethargy and idleness prevented me from ever registering with any gaming website... ever... but I knew, deep down, that one day I would find the one. I had been aware of Destructoid for some time, but was prompted to investigate further after realizing that Jonathan Holmes wrote a review that actually displayed his intense, personal passion for No More Heroes 2- a game I also loved dearly. His subsequent pieces dissecting the game and exploring its metaphors and allusions solidified my position- this place is the pigs knickers. Destructoid didn't try and pretend to give unbiased, castrated, passionless news editorials and reviews. After reading the opinion pieces by Jim Sterling, I knew that I had found my home. This place has balls. And ovaries. And hormones. And fancy shiny things. Pretty much, Destructiod has got soul. Suddenly, I noticed the kickass mascot. And then it clicked.
Yes. Hell yes. I was in Singapore during a business study abroad with my university and found this robot. This robot was kickass. I had to have a picture with it. If they didn't cut off your hands and cane you for stealing in Singapore, it would have been on my back and hopping fences back to the hotel with lightning speed. We would have drank cheap boxed wine and played Castle Crashers until I had to oil his lovely robotic thumbs. But it was not to be.
Fast forward a year or so, and here I am on Destructoid, a recent college grad, 22 years of age, almost no friends in the area having moved back home from university in North Carolina, searching for meaning and a sense of belonging. Well, maybe not anything that deep. Maybe just a place where the first response to this post won't be "cocks!". Maybe a place full of unique, interesting individuals who have a shared passion for videogames and camaraderie... Maybe a place like Destructoid.