1. In order to be a bad ass, something fucked must happen to you while you were a kid.
Examples:
* Anakin aka Darth Vader: Mom died as a kid, becomes a slave.
* Boba Fett: Dad gets beheaded by muthafuckin [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GTo48iR58VE" target="_blank]Sam Jackson.[/url]
* Luke Skywalker: Lives with his aunt and uncle so obviously mom and dad aren't in the picture. Obi told him that Vader killed his dad. (which is a fucking lie but whatever)
2. The more limbs you get cutoff, the more l33t you will become.
3. Falling in love with a female and being super jealous leads to the dark side, ultimately cementing your role as a bad ass. [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZYQUq3q9HQ" target="_blank](besides the crying like a little bitch...)[/url]
4. No matter what movie he's in, Harrison Ford will always be
Indiana Jones. And I know, Indiana Jones came out after the first Star Wars. Don't give a shit.
5. George Lucas is a money hungry douche because he got talked into making the prequel movies. All he did was fuck up people's childhood. Way to go George, way to go.
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ZOMG SPOILERS!!!! WTF!!
Cause when he first made Star Wars, it WAS called Episode IV: A New Hope. And when he did an acceptance speech he said how he considered all 6 movies to really be just ONE movie...one really long movie.
So surely Harrison Ford is always Han Solo no matter what film he's in.
Also, you fail. Star Wars = win.
Oh God, I just went up 8 hojillion goddamn nerd points.
Now make a Chewie vs. Short Round contest and things'll get interesting.
[cricket noises][odd stares]
Ok, i'll just leave..
Part of the deal he made with the Kaminoans to be the genetic template for the clone army was that he'd get a fuck ton of monies and an unaltered clone for him to raise as a son.