Quick reminder ; I've previously stated that my blogs would be weekly and that I vowed to fulfill JOURNALISM, Well my fellow gamers.. I lied; I am a clever con artist...it is regratable but actually I've been way too busy with my biddings and to be honest , Sassy Bounty hunters propinquity are less than few in my lair nowadays. So inspiration is not to sly either.

Enough rambling pilgrims! A blog draws near!

Since I was a little green monster growing up in my resident Brinstar , way after the advent of Super Metroid and Donkey Kong Country 2 , I've always had a sweet spot in my little reptilian heart for Startegic war games. It is not suprising that two slots in my top ten videogames of all time are occupied by representatives of that genre.

With the clairvoyance of my JOURNALISM I can already hear you say:

SHEEYEAH SON! STARCRAFT IS LAIK TEH BEST SHIET EVAR MAYNE ! ISS LAIK STRAIGHT UP YOUSE BUILD A BASE AND THEEN IS LAIK 30 SECONDS ZERG RUSHZES KEKEKEKKEKEKEK!

Now hold there little fella! The complexity of my love is not satisfied by the shier appeal of space marines or even alien civilizations. I concur that Science Fiction is awesome, have a look at my entire trivia on videogames and you shall find reasoning.



No today , I am here to talk about the best real-time startegy game on this side of Company of Heroes. In my perpetual tradition of clearing things up here's a list of why Men of War performs excellence in it's kind;

- No Ressources (Because they are for pussies)
- Limited ammo and gear (Because superior firepower is for pussies)
- Bad Voice Acting (Because David Hayter's acting is for pussies)
- Russian Made (Because in Soviet Russia pussies wear blue hats............. .. . -_-)
- Direct Control Mechanics (Because automation is for pussies unlike Riker who fuckin' docked the Saucer Section manually!)
- Tiger tanks get raped by Maltildas (Because THIS GAME DOESN'T FUCK AROUND!)
- Destructable environment (Because the French do not need housing)

I have rarely in my life played an entire serie of games capable of implenmenting standards RTS basics while on the other hand giving the player the freedom to do whatever he wants and destroy what ever he wishes on the battlefield. (We all know that freedom is purely american, Althought I am a french-speaking canuck) The perfect blend of many genres are what make Men of War such an enjoyable but somehow underappreciated title, not to mention the threshold installment in the franchise being one of my highly revered games.



Strangely enough the franchise has been kept under your furry noses and commercialized like an utter trainwreck jumping from three publishers in less than five years. Customers should be advised that this outstanding trilogy is available off the capitalist digital distributor leviathan that is Steam for reasonable pricings.



Men of War is the best russian made videogame since Tetris and even if your blockie attitude makes you vacillate, tear down that wall mister Destructoid and give it a warm American tackle. The only thing that can happen to you is full communist endoctrinement during the playthrough.

Long live Premier Zangief and his maszuuuuulz and his chest hair.


You are standing in front of Brinstar Elevator chamber
But you forgot to bring your cheap vodka and funky Anubis Camo.

Shall you redeem yourself to capitalism until next time?