So I'm just a lowly 2-time red ring surviver, but it's threatening a third already, just a month after the last one, I was wondering why Microsoft doesn't institute some type of "Red Ringer Survivor's Club" for us? It could be broken down into tiers based on the amount of grief you've been caused and the higher the tier, the more free loot Microsoft owes you.

1-Time RRoD Survivor:
-1-Month Xbox Live Card
-Xbox 360 stress ball

2-Time RRoD Survivor:
-Free "Platinum Hits" game of your choice
-Xbox 360 Bottle Opener (for drinking away your RRoD related sorrows)
-1-Month Xbox Live Card
-Xbox 360 stress ball

3 Time RRoD Survivor:
-Free MS published game of your choice
-Special Edition RRoD "Red Heart" medal of honor
-"Survivor" hit single ringtone by Destiny's Child
-All of the 2 and 1 time survivor rewards

4+ Time RRoD Survivor:
-You get to personally kick Billy G in the balls
-You get to shine J Allard's head for free (49.99 value!)
-All of the 3, 2, & 1 survivor rewards

Speaking of J Allard, where the fuck is he? One day he's the Howie Mandel of Xbox the next day he's talking about Zune, then he's vanished.

-KnuxSonic