So you've beat all the missions, found all the pigeons and jumps, finished the races and drug trafficking, and talked to all the perverts? Bet that Annihilator feels rather underwhelming after all that, right? Well there are ways to kill time in Liberty City once you've beat the game without resorting to it's terrible excuse for multiplayer (Yeah, I went there). Here's a rundown on some of the shallow and extremely pointless things I tend to do when I'm out strolling in the worst city in America.

1. The Swingset Glitch
I imagine I'm not the first person to blog about this here, and I'm sure as hell not the first to enjoy it. But you try telling me that driving a car into a swingset and being launched halfway across the city isn't, to coin a phrase, fucking awesome. For the minority who haven't tried this, the idea is simple. You get a car, and drive to a swingset, then drive into the metal bars. Some crazy stuff will happen, and for a moment you'll think the world is ending. Alas it just sends your car flying into the air in ways Buzz Lightyear can only dream of. Well, either that or you go flying through the windshield and die instantly. It's like russian roulette... with real Russians!



Here's the location to try it out, I won't ruin the surprise by posting a video. But trust me when I tell you this won't be a one time thing. Soon you'll want to try it with motorbikes (Spoiler alert: You always die. Always), boats and helicopters. Also trying it with friends in freeplay adds to the experience too. Get 4 people in a car and launch yourself across the city. It's still fucking awesome.

2. Hooker Rodeo
There's nothing quite like the Euphoria engine, and in the same respect, nothing like exploiting it for your own pleasure. You can technically do this with civilians, but hookers are far easy to catch. Eventually you'll probably get tired of this one, but it's fun for a while, especially when trying different cars. It's simple really. Go and find a hooker, and when she grabs the door drive off. Hopefully she'll still be grabbing the door handle, clinging on for dear life while you hurtle down the streets of Liberty City. So you have to see how long she holds on for, which can last a few blocks or half the city.

3. Dogfights
Quite possibly the only time the Annihilator is useful (Why they didn't give that thing rockets I'll never know, the minigun is terrible), and it's rather easy to set up. Grab an Annihilator, raise your wanted level (3 stars seems to be the best), and start mowing down helicopters. Bear in mind they will shoot back, unless you take out the gunner. Eventually they'll be so damaged they fly away to escape, but that just makes it more fun. The police in this game are strict enough, and this is the only time I've really had fun taking them out.



4. Free Fall Without A Parachute
I know a lot of people who have complaining about the lack of a parachute in GTAIV. Well at least it makes for some fun, right? The idea of this one is simple. Grab a helicopter, fly as high and fast as you can over the middle of Algonquin, and try and land in the park's lake. Well that's the way I mess around with helicopters, I'm sure there are more. I know some people try to fly through the wires of bridges, although I've never tried it. Trying to dive a few hundred feet into a tiny lake is good enough to me.

5. Cabbie Carmageddon
If there's one thing you can rely on immigrant taxi drivers, it's that they will fight you to the death if you even touch their car. This is especially useful when you feel like leading a few of them to their untimely but equally hilarious death. Simply grab a bat or knife and hit the back windows of a taxi. The driver will get out and follow you to do some brawlin'. Now try and lead him into traffic to see if anyone will run him over (Chances are ridiculously high since everyone drives like a fucking maniac in Liberty City now). The best place to try this is Times Square thanks to the high amount of lanes and taxis. Also hitting multiple cars to get more cabbies run after you is a good way of ensuring some action.



6. Roman's Drive-by Service
While we've already established that cabbie's turn Hulk-like when you peer into their car windows, they become instantly less cool the moment you get in one for a ride and start shooting out the window. It's like they have morals or something. God bless Roman though, even if his drivers are cunts. A great way to kill time is to get him to send you a cab, tell the driver to hurry up and unleash wave after wave of bullets out the window. The driver won't care, and police will have a near-impossible time stopping you. Start from one end of the game, then go to the other and see how many stars you can rack up.

7. Allah Akbar!!
Suicide is cool (According to My Chemical Romance fans anyway). So by proxy blowing everyone around you to smithereens by suicide is fucking awesome. This is something I've carried over from Crackdown (Throwing mines on your car, finding the person you're playing with in co-op then blowing him the fuck up might be the best way to die ever). GTA IV offers a variety of ways, including (But not limited to):

1. Overcooking grenades
2. RPG-icide
3. Car bombs
4. Driving off rooftops
5. Crashing helicopters into buildings

The list goes on, but it's always entertaining, especially if you can take out anyone nearby. Car bombs seem to be the most fun to me. Driving into the security building in Algonquin, getting 4 stars instantly then blowing away the hoard of cops that come over will never get old. Ever.



8. Pushing people
Remember when you played Worms, and to add extra insult to your friends, you'd prod them over the edge? Add 3D, human models and lots of blood, and you've got a winner! Pushing people is one of the most fun things to do since you barely get busted for it. Pushing people down stairs, pushing people infront of cars and trains, pushing people into the water, pushing people into fire. Fair enough, it's not the most glamourous thing to try, but it is very fun and effective. Just wait in a subway and push someone infront of a train, then collect the loot afterward. You will be doing it more and more.

9. Popping Tires (I'm not going to make the reference you want me to make)
Police chases in GTAIV have become a lot less fun now you can see where every cop is on the radar. There are ways around that though, such as using the Faggio as an escape vehicle and watching the slowest police chase in history take place. But I've found popping the tires on your car before shooting the city up a better one. Not only does it make you slower, but it makes the car ridiculously hard to handle. This of course ups the awesome-meter when you do evade the police (I suggest a 3 star minimum to make it interesting), but the chances of that happening are worse than AIDS being cured.

10. Niko Bellic, Stunt Man
OK, this one requires cheats, and it takes a while to set up every time you die (And you will die), but it's still a lot of fun to do. Find a tall building (The Empire State Building works best), get as high as you can, spawn a motorbike, drive off and try not to die. Added bonuses for including flips and firing a gun if you land it. The Getalife building works pretty well too, and is easier to drive off, but the ESB is still my favourite.



A lot of these you can mess around with in party mode, which can make them more fun (Especially the swingset... god I love the swingset). But if you're ever bored with the online aspect or just messing around in single player, it's a good way to burn off some time and waste some ammo/money.