"In the year 2000, gamers will no longer be forced to trudge into EB Games for any title. The interweb will allow every man, woman, and child to buy their and ship their games from home, without even flying their space cars to the space mall."

Let me tell you a tale of triumph:

Recently, a copy of Art of Fighting's anthology caught my eye in an EB Games, and for the attractive price of 20 clams, no less. Unfortunately, the aforementioned location was a problem: I abhor the acrid scent customer service at most EB stores, and I worked at freakin' Disneyland. However, instead of rendering my very soul to EB's cruel embrace, I turned to Amazon and its loving online touch. In less than two minutes, I had Art of Fighting (and Brain Age, woot!) reserved and ordered. I even saved $10 dollars, and there was no shipping charge.

Why can't everything on the planet be like this? I didn't even have to put on pants to get the games I coveted. The progress of future technology can only be measured by how many things I can do in my underwear.

The day that e-stores and digital distribution replace the wicked webs of corporate-driven pawn shops is a day will never come soon enough.