WE HEARD YOU LIKE SHIT-BITCHES?

WELL, HOW ABOUT SATAN-BITCHES?

I FUCKED A GOLFER.

PEOPLE TELL ME TO STOP PLAGIARIZING THEIR ASSHOLES. 

LISTEN HERE:

http://joshandcharlish.bandcamp.com/album/geriatric-satan-bitches-ep

WATCH US, BECAUSE WE ARE ALWAYS WATCHING YOU!!!!!

So, you've just bought a Dreamcast.

You've thought to yourself, "I can't use this for cutting bagels, this was a waste of time and money."

Herein lies the undying truth, the everlasting ecstasy:

The Dreamcast plays video games.

Here are the games you want to pick up:

Sonic Adventure 2:



ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND! ROLLIN' AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND!

bAd Boyz II: Miami Takeout:



This was the first game I ever bought for my Dreamcat. Alot of people tell me that it isn't a Dreamzcats game, they are liars. Michael Vick does a great job with the voices is in this video game. I reminds me of the time my dad wouldn't beat me which was a happy time, but not often.

JFK: Reloaded:



If it weren't for JFK, then war is gone. Be a true American hero, save the poor from the aggression of this terrible boy. I was told that I'm a terrible little boy, but that was when dad. Anyway, try to listen to Daniel Johnston while you play this. A= 10/10

Hour of the Wolf:



This movie was confusing, but a good addition to the Dreamcastle archive. I don't know what an Ingmar Bergman is, but I assume he is a superhero. 3/6 starz movie channel.

Nikon d5100:



I took a picture of this camera. It was high definition. I HATE SOMKERS. IF YOU SMOKE, I HOPE THAT CANCER IS THERE TO BEAT YOU SENSELESS. Did I mention I love Viewtiful Jews. I am one of you. I AM AN ALIAS. HA HA HA, ALUCARD ARUCARD.

SIR INTEGRA!


Well, I hope you know what games to buy on the Dreamcastel now.

Next day, I will be diong a Sega Saturday.

Stay tuned@

NO, WE'RE NOT GOING TO DO THIS AGAIN.

WE POUR OUT HEART OUT IN WELCOMING OURSELVES, AND THIS WHAT WE GET.

A FAILBLOG.

WELL, WE'VE FAILED ALL OUR LIVES.

AND THE ONE SUCCESS WE GET, YOU TAKE IT AWAY FROM US.

THIS IS OUR LIVES.

OUR DREAMS.

CRUSHED BY MONSTERS LIKE YOU.

THIS IS NOT THE TOP TEN GAMES OF PAX EAST!

THIS IS REALITY.

I'm nervous. I've been a nervous boy for most of my life, having to be strapped to the chair to eat dinner. The fear is always what's consumed me. I just don't know how to handle it.

DON'T FORCE US INTO A CORNER.

THE LAST TIME THAT HAPPENED, I SHIT MYSELF.

CAN YOU THE SHIT, DESTRUCTOID?



CAN YOU HANDLE OUR BROWN LOVE?


W̛̮̮̩̦͕͚̳̯̄̓̾̆ͩͥ̅ͩ̆̄̾̅͊͞ͅEͧͥͬ̄̒͑̈́̑̌ͣͭ̅ͫͩ̋̉̇͝҉̰̲̪̟̜̝͕̮̘͍͖̣̟̲L̴̶̷̨͎̣̖̤͚̺̟̹̣͍͖̫̤̱̮͈̂̀̄̑̇͊͆̍ͪͣ͠C͑̅ͤ͋̀͐̓̚͏̛͈̱͖̳͕͉̟͘͡Ǫ̧̙͚̘̩̟̫͉̙̜̙͕̦̲͇͑ͭͫͣM̨͚̻̖̟͈̝̬̭̞͍͍̗͉̊̈ͨ̔̄̽ͨ̇͋ͦ̈́͌̊Ẽ̉͆ͯ̀̌̔ͨ̾͊ͭ̏̋̇҉̶̣̳̝̠̦͚͇̞̙͎̬̟͇̬͈͖̘̮ ̸̰͔̺̖ͤ͒ͣ̒ͨ̀T̾ͥ̔̀ͧ͂̓͘͢͏̧͉̯͓̬͙͓͔̮̗͍͕͟H͗̌̄́̚҉͔̼̖̠̥͚̠̱̰̭̩̰̀Ȅ̶̯̪̤̣̞̮̹̺̯̹͋ͪ̇͠ ̵̧̬͓̘̟̏̄̍̓̊ͩ̚͠L̴̟̟̘̦̥ͯͦ͒͆̓̇͌̌͜O̸͂ͨ̈̃̑ͭ̒̔͛̃ͩ͛҉̮̪̻͓̝͓̱͔͚̬̖̩̬̖͜͞R̛̥͕͔̤͙̪͖͕͕̣̱̳͉̩̱̮̻̎̀̾́̑ͤ͂̎ͣͦͬ͋͑ͭ̐̒̕͜͝Ḑ̶̢͖͔̥̥̯͔̙̘̭̪̣ͮͦͣͨ̒̿̍̓̄̽̓̽̚ͅS̳͉͈̝̼̙̞̟̤͈̅̇ͦ̏ͧ̾ͩ̾̈́̿̚̕͜
̢̜̹̭̼̾͗͗͗͑͂ͨ͗͂ͤ̏̆͟

W̸̧ͩ̔ͣ͛̾ͣ͌̓ͭͤ̔͝҉̲̠̱͚͓̻͉̲͕͙̘̤̻͔̤͘E̸̬͇̲̪̟͚͍̫̼͓͎̲̱͔͍ͦ͋ͪͨ͋́̚ ̵̸̨͕̣͉͓̙̘͙̯̪̯̤̆̎̋͂̿̃̌ͪ̃͑ͦ̌͐ͩ̿ͅͅĻ̸̴̩͈̯͔͓͈̪̪̤̰̤ͬͮͯ͋ͭ̆̏̿̃̌͂̍͌̓̏ͮ̚O̗͉̟̳̬͙͇͚͉̹̳̻̤ͨ̐ͯ̃͑͐̋̀͘V̶̡̘̯̗͕̦͕̟̳̖̦̹̹͙̦̬̤̿̌̿̐̅́̉̆̔̕͡ͅE̪̳̘̥̙͙̿ͦ͋̾̍̾̓́̐̎̀͜͞ ̸̴̞̭̙͇̥̝̬̭̮ͪͤ̔̅̅ͪ͒͊͒͌̈́͋͗ͫ̓ͯẎ̅ͥͤͭ̀͝҉̼͉̰͈̦̻̱̫͇͔̲͔͞͠Ỡ̛̯̬̪̥̱̞͉̐ͫ̀̓̏ͦ͂̏̎̓̅ͬ͐͑͞U̸̔̎̈́ͭ̍́͛̿ͬ̀́ͭ́҉̡̼̲͕̺̤̼̩̗̻̥
̧͍̙̘̰̝̮̱̮̞͕͈ͭͣ̊̍̾̀́ͅ
Tͦͥ͑̏ͦ̄ͪ͋ͮ̈́́ͫ͑̀͏̵̛̖͍̞͍̹͟͝H̛͙̹̼͔͚̬͓̬̰̼͍͇̘͒́ͯ̈ͣ̋ͬ͘̕͘ͅE̸̢̯͇̦̭̠͍ͦ͆̐̆̽͐̎͆͐̒̽͢Ṛ̡̪͉͈͚͉̫̰̞̰̪̎̄̔́͌ͪ͂ͫ͊̍ͮ̔͒̍̄ͤ͋Ḙ̸̡̫͇͖̖̞̞͓͙̖͔̝̯̪̠̫̭͗̒̌ͯ͒ͤ́̑̀ͥ̄͟͠ͅ ̢̨̼͓̙̘̠̥͇͔̗͚̩ͭ̌̂̍͂̂ͅͅI̧̭̤̱̬̱̬͖̤͉̠̼̬̣̫͚̘̤͚͗̃ͭͦ͋̇̐ͥ͛ͮͣ͊ͪ͘S̨̮̣̼̲̃̅̔̄̇ͨ̄́̚͜͝ ̸̛̳͈̪̖̝̘̣̭̣̙͚̿ͦͦͧͩ̋̃ͧͤ̓ͬͯ͛͂ͦ̀́͜Ņͧ̽̋̂̽͆͛ͤ̓ͫ̓́͏̮̩̩̪̮̫̬͈̥̕Ő̶̯̤͚̳̺̜͂́̒͐͆͑͗͆̾̈͛ͤͬ̚͝ ̨̮̦̺̲͈͈͓̮̹̱͂ͩ͌̃ͮ̋ͤ͌̇ͬ̍̌̈ͭ̀͗́͟Ę̴̥͓̣̫͓͎̞͔͇̘̐̆ͭ̎ͤ̽ͧ̈́̋̀͡͝ͅŠ̢̡̺̮̥̞̫̭̪̟͖̹͉͚͉͙̲̞ͫ̅́ͫ͊̓́͂̐̾̕͘͠C̑̂͋͂̍ͬ͐̄̅̒ͥ̓̏͑̓̅ͯ͂͋͘͟͏̛҉̥̯̝̥̙͉̩̥͍̪̘̰̳̺̠̲̹Ả̴̯̺̪̩͍͔̠̺̳͖͙̙̼̺̳͍̪̓ͮ̇̄͛͛͑͆̅̒͗̍̈́ͯ̎́̚͜ͅP̨͙̰̘̭̯͕̝ͭͮ̋̍̉͋́́Ë̛́͋̈́̎ͮ͊́҉̢̘̙̩͉͚͈͍̲̱͕̳̥̳ ̢̛̲̣̜̠͇̯̦̯̦̗̺̩̳̩͉͙̱̂ͫ̄ͩ̀ͨ̈̎ͭ́̏͌̊ͧ̔̕ͅḞ̣̱͖̖͚͓̱̟̼͍͙͉̰̞͓̞ͮ̒̈́̚͝R̙̪̤̦͇̲̓̈́ͤ̀̊͂̉̃͐ͮ͛ͪ̂̾͜Oͭͪ͒̏̅̔̎̚͢͏̶̡̞͎̫̖̻͈̥̝M̟͍̩̍͌̊ͬ͗ͮͩ̀̈́͑͞͡ ͑́̃̾ͭ̏̚͏̙̼̣̟̜͍̻͕̳̟͍̤͈O̵̴͗̀ͫ́̄͗̿̈́ͥ̅̾͂̽̎̿͒́͂͐͏̢̞̘̖̤̖̟̤̙͚̦͓̜͎̲̪̤̥͔̱́Ụ̻̝̳̬͙̗͇̯̘̙̥̼̦ͨ̎̾̎̂͊ͤ͋ͭ̂̚͝͝͞ͅͅR̊̊̊͆̀͡͏̸̸̷̥̭̪̗͍̱͍̳̝̙̮̳̺̥ͅ ̡̛̞̜̟͓̠͙̬̟ͣ̉ͨL̶̶̠̯̮̤̥͚͚̘̝ͮͪ͗ͩ̊̈̑̽̅̔͡O̷̺͇̠̥̮̠̩̞͉̤͔͌͗̈ͤ̂ͭͯ͋ͬ̂̆̄̄͑͛̄͡V̇ͮ̅̌ͩ̈ͣ͏̢̖̱̺͈̺̜̼͇͓͠Ḛ͚̭̟͍̳̜͔̙̟ͫͤ̾ͧ͋̅̀͢ͅͅ





But seriously, HELLO.

This is a brief answer to your problems.

We are chaos.

We are destruction.

Fuck the Poor.

Try not to ream your child more than the appropriate daily amount.

Everyone will party.

My dong is amazing.

Pay homage to my dong.

You can not escape the wrath.

If the kid screams, he isn't ready for the manhood.

Burn the children.

Burn your wife.

Burn your cat.

Burn the car.

I love you, I love you, I do.

Welcome the real gods.

The ones with honor.

The ones with veracity.

The ones with huge dongs.

Welcome to our friendship.

The almond glaze is almost too succulent.

Try not to be impoverished.

We are extremely deleterious.

No, I am not a thesaurus.

Fuck the Pope, my god is the sky-king deity, known only as: Brass Motherfucker.

We make videos:

http://www.youtube.com/user/JoshandCharlish?feature=mhee

We also make music:

http://joshandcharlish.bandcamp.com/

AND WE HAVE FUCKING WRITTEN WORDS YOU FUCKS:

https://twitter.com/JoshandCharlish

We love you, Destructoid.

Welcome, once again, to our friendship.