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Jon Hartley avatar 1:45 AM on 12.17.2008  (server time)
What to Watch in Netflix Instant Queue? Try These... (NVGR)

If you are one of the Xbox 360 owners that have taken advantage of the streaming Netflix titles option that was added with the New Xbox Experience, it may be hard to separate the good titles from the crap. Hell, it may be hard to even find anything that looks remotely interesting, given the relatively limited selection of mostly obscure and older titles. However, if you take a look around, you might find some pretty good stuff. Here's my contribution to your Netflix viewing experience. If you saw anything that was awesome on Instant Queue, let me know and I'll give it a shot as well. Here are a few of the more memorable things I've watched so far that come to mind first:

Talking Heads: Stop Making Sense (1984)

I love 80's music (I should get a free pass here, since I actually *remember* the 80's, for the most part). That's why I gave this Talking Heads concert film a try. I'm a bit ashamed after watching this that I wasn't more aware of how completely and ridiculously awesome the Talking Heads were, as I was only really aware of a few hit songs and the fact that the lead singer was a nutball. Well, I was amused, entertained, confused, and rocked to the very core of my manhood by this kickass concert film. And you will be, too. Unless you're a girl- in which case, change "manhood" to "womanhood".

Why you'll like it-

Cause it's got great music, the antics of the band are highly entertaining and a little fruity, and the film itself (completed with footage from three shows) is widely cited as one of the best concert films ever. The choice to have David Byrne begin on stage by himself with just an acoustic guitar and cassette deck for "Psycho Killer" before adding a member (and parts of the set, which begins in disarray) for each subsequent song is pretty awesome.

But you might not like it if...'re not entertained by crazy stage antics, energetic bra-less backup singers, keyboard players who obviously were doing lines of coke, and a Big Suit (which is exactly what it sounds like). Oh, and if you hate the 80's and music from the decade.

Teeth (2006)

I suppose this could be loosely considered a horror flick, but if we're going to call torture porn "horror", what's the harm? Basically, lemme break it down for ya- a teenage girl has very sharp teeth in her happy area, which will promptly bite anything that doesn't belong down there. The synapsis kind of goes like this:

1. Girl is freaked out by sharp vag teeth, and swears off sex.
2. Unfortunate event happens to her, immediately followed by very unfortunate event happening to a stupid young man.
3. Girl slowly realizes the awesomeness of having vag teeth.
4. Hilarity ensues.

And no, those aren't spoilers, as this is all spelled out even in the movie description. This movie is not high-brow (should I even have to say that?), despite any kind of feminist overtones or messages about women's roles in conventional horror movies that lie beneath. However, it's a pretty fun movie and you won't forget it anytime soon.

Why you'll like it-

Because it's about a girl with sharp teeth in her vagina. Oh, and because the director (Mitchell Lichtenstein) and cast take full advantage of the disgusting yet hilarious awesomeness that can result from such a scenario. There is also some pretty bad (in an entertaining way) acting at parts, and it's got the kid from Nip/Tuck who ended up looking like Michael Jackson by the more recent seasons (though he looks slightly more normal here).

But you might not like it if... don't want anything to do with the events that might transpire when gerkin and toothed beaver collide.

Dead Man's Shoes (2004)

I happened upon this relatively recent British film and gave it a shot based upon the interesting premise. A soldier who is gone away to God Knows Where doing God Knows What comes back to find that his mentally challenged brother has been...treated not so nicely by some local ne'er-do-wells. What does big brother do? He kicks some ass.

Why you'll like it-

The premise is compelling (at least to me), the film has some great moments, and there's a good amount of bloody violence to fall back on if none of that works for you. The performances are pretty good, and you may find that the whole thing sticks with you for a little while. I'm very close with my brother, and though he's not mentally handicapped and has never been messed with by a gang of idiots, the storyline resonated with me.

But you might not like it if... aren't British and you absolutely demand to know what all the characters are saying all the time. (Yeah, crazy, I know) I was wishing that there was a captioning option available a few times, but maybe that's just me. I mean, I could even understand what the hell people were saying on "Deadwood", but I was lost a few times here.

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