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Everything on Wikipedia is literally true
Jim Sterling | 4:40 PM on 09.16.2009 108 comments


For some reason, I have a Wikipedia page. Despite the fact it has numerous issues and has been vandalized countless times, it's managed to stay up for about a year. I do not know why. Anyway, people who think about me and my life more than even I do tend to go on it regularly and write things. Usually they're very boring, very unimaginative insults, but someone has truly outdone themselves today.

The Dtoid tips line got sent a link to the latest edits, and they are truly brilliant. Since Wikipedia will probably take them down before the day is out, I have decided to post them here for posterity and the hope that you will find these literally true facts as entertaining as I found them. Remember, every single one of these is a real fact!

Racism

It is also well know that he is massive racist lying Nazi and many websites on the internet have proof of this activity. (http://digg.com/gaming_news/Could_Destructoid_s_staff_be_racist)

The proof take many forms here is a short list of just some of the things he has done.

FACT: He has stated "Mexicans always ruin everything"

FACT: None of the relatively low amount of money raised went to Mexican children

FACT: None of the money went to children who wanted to play a PC game of there choice so he is racist to any one who touches a PC.

FACT: Jim sterling could not operate a PC with a mouse to save his life making him extremely jealous of all PC game players and there skills he also cant sing so he hates everybody on American idol or anybody with real talent.

FACT: Jim sterling is not funny so he hates anybody who can accomplish humor.

FACT: Jim sterling is dumb enough to by maps on console ports of PC games for much money when then original PC games give them to users for free with many other features

FACT: Jim sterling does tons of things only a stupid console living boy would do it is a lifetime of this activity that lead him to the life of a Nazi and saying “Nein” to many PC gaming children when asked for his charity.

FACT : Jim sterling will play $60 USA currency for games he can get on PC for $30 to $40 us currency

FACT: Jim sterling has never been with in 99 miles of a real PC capable of playing PC games at decent quality so he would not know how horrible looking and playing the console ports of games he is playing are. This makes any review of them he publishes irrelevant useless.

FACT: Jim sterling is homophobic and loves the video games such as shadow complex that support anti homosexual values.

FACT: He played the horrible PAL versions of video console games most of his life and is unable to tell what games look like running correct on NTSC Televisions.

FACT: at the destructoid trip to Cancun he had sexual relation ships for one night with most of the destructoid staff in a hot tub including Chad Concelmo a known homosexual possibly half Asian male. He was so stoned on drugs and alcoholic beverages and remembers nothing .

FACT like all destruction staff he hates everybody especially there readers.

FACT: Jim sterling Idol is Hitler and in the early 1990’s he played wolfenstein 3d on his PC thinking it was a game where Hitler kills all and rises to power by slaughtering millions with his own hands. How ever he was horrified you kill Hitler and Nazi’s in it thus from that day forward he hates PC’s tat run games and any form of technology…. Also bionic commando.

FACT: Jim sterling is not really married to a woman he is living with his sexual partner Chad Concelmo trying to pass “prop 8” and he still hates homosexuals this creates his inner torment deep in his soul.

FACT: Jim sterling is the most hated destructoid staff member and many people public ridicule him on the website.

FACT: Jim sterling was once replaced for a week by a fat monkey in a banana costume and nobody noticed except Chad Concelmo who wondered where his xbox 360 noob buddy went.



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100 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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next 50 comments

garison's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 16:49
garison
Ugh, Jim Sterling is such a gay, and everyone knows that all gays should not be allowed on the internet.
Guyver 0's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 16:52
Guyver 0
wait......... has someone changed the stuff I wrote?
McSnow's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 16:55
McSnow
Gah, the grammar, it hurts!
Dead Movie Star's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 16:57
Dead Movie Star
I never knew you were gay.

Now I do.
seltzermx's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 16:58
seltzermx
Who the fuck is Jim Sterling?
Sean Carey's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:00
Sean Carey
FACT : Haters keep hating, and playas keep playing.
storyr's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:00
storyr
Who the fuck is "destruction" staff...

People fail.
JTHomeslice's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:03
JTHomeslice
"including Chad Concelmo a known homosexual possibly half Asian male."

That's the hardest I've laughed in a while.
shipero's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:03
shipero
Ooh, I love this game. Let me try.

FACT: Jim Sterling has never seen a vagina. However, when given the proper tools, can sculpt a anatomically correct model out of marble.

FACT: Jim Sterling was single-handedly responsible for the My Lai Massacre.
UglyDuck's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:04
UglyDuck
What I love about this is the way that it gradually and subtly gets more grammatically incorrect as the article progresses.
CelicaCrazed's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:05
CelicaCrazed
Jim, I'm guessing you said something bad about computers over the internet. From now on you must post all articles via the Wii's browser.
Primo's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:07
Primo
damn that was very clever
BlaspheMerius's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:10
BlaspheMerius
The intarnet, she haets.
ace of knaves's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:10
ace of knaves
IS CHAD CONCELMO A HALF ASIAN?! Further investigation: WARRANTED
Gibbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:10
Gibbo
To be fair, I think anyone would have a relationship with Chad given the choice.
Usedtabe's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:13
Usedtabe
@Garison: But is he the only gay in the village?
Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:13
Holyetheline
Jim this is the best Wikipedia page ever. Please stay true to these FACTS. <3
Chris Carter's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:14
Chris Carter
I thought Jim Sterling was Luc Bernard.
Naim Master's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:18
Naim Master
I always thought Wardrox was your gay lover... Oh well!
GamesAreArt's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:19
GamesAreArt
"Jim Sterling is a television producer and writer.

A native of Boulder, Colorado, Sterling moved to the West Coast in 1988 to attend Pepperdine University. After graduation, he worked at 20th Century Fox as production assistant. Later he acted, wrote and produced the independent film Gunplay (1994), a dark comedy which became a cult favorite through minimal German distribution.

Following several stints as a researcher and writer's assistant, Sterling worked as a production assistant on the L.A. Law television series (1994). Since then he has collaborated on selected TV-series, including Space: Above and Beyond (1995), Three (1998), L.A. Doctors (1998), The Practice (2001-2002), Law & Order: Criminal Intent (2003-2005), Numb3rs (2005) and The Bronx is Burning (2007)."

I hope you make more movies Jim. But it says nothing about destructoid in this article.
Aaron Mxy Yost's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:23
Aaron Mxy Yost
Oh, so THAT'S the reason for your inner torment deep in your soul.
Lurfadur's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:24
Lurfadur
"sexual relation ships"
The image left in my mind after reading that made me lol.
Sterling Aiayla Lyons's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:25
Sterling Aiayla Lyons
Could we be seeing the rise of the next Chuck Norris!?

Nahh...Though FACT!!!:Jim Sterling did shoot down a world war to plane in Battlefield 1943 just by looking at it and yelling bang at his screen.

Also Fact: Jim Sterling IS bias.
GamesAreArt's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:25
GamesAreArt
I found the actual page, I'd edit it back, but its just too funny.
CitizenErased's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:27
CitizenErased
This stuff is pretty self-evident to be honest.
PappaDukes's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:27
PappaDukes
@GamesAreArt - try looking under "Jim Seterling (Journalist)" but I think "Journalist" is some sort of typo. I'm sure it means to say (King of Video Games.)
mario actually's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:39
mario actually
Now come on, Jim... You wrote that yourself now, didn't ya'? Always looking for ways to promote his racial-sex agenda.
wanderingpixel's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:43
wanderingpixel
FACT: Jim Sterling wanks off to porn at the local library.

Jesus, when did Wikipedia become 4chan.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:50
Jim Sterling
"I hope you make more movies Jim. But it says nothing about destructoid in this article."

The entry is Jim Sterling (Journalist)
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:52
Elsa
Damn... I guess I missed the week when you were replaced by a fat monkey in a banana costume!
Neonie's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:54
Neonie
Haha I think you can totally tell their being sarcastic and wrote it for the lulz.
Trebz's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 17:58
Trebz
This is brilliant. I especially love the Fresh Prince of Bel Air bit in the article. Just stumbling on that and thinking it was serious for about half of a second was hilarious.
Takeshi's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:00
Takeshi
Shipero wins.
DaedHead8's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:01
DaedHead8
I got one.

FACT: Jim Sterling's trademark monocle gives him accurate power read outs of all his enemies. So far, none of them have been over 9000.
Katamaya's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:02
Katamaya
This might be the best blog on Destructoid. Ever.
GamesAreArt's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:06
GamesAreArt
@jim and @pappa Look up "I found the actual page" I had to go through the destructoid page.
Bob Muir's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:18
Bob Muir
I know Jim is seen by many as the "controversial" editor, so I'm not surprised to see these hilarious comments, but why does Chad get roped in so much? Does anyone not like Chad? I just can't see it.
Puppy Licks's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:21
Puppy Licks
This is incredible!
Darren Nakamura's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:44
Darren Nakamura
Man, PC gamers are so angry. Why are they so angry at everybody else? Can't they just enjoy their "superior" system without bothering us about it?
vApathyv's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 18:57
vApathyv
Adolf Sterling huh? Well, seig heil I guess.
DJDuffy 's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 19:39
DJDuffy
Fact: I want to have Jim Sterling's babies!
Eschatos's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 19:46
Eschatos
As a PC gamer, I am ashamed if that shit was said seriously. Fuck that guy.

FACTJim can cure cancer by glaring at the afflicted.
Brian Szabelski's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 20:16
Brian Szabelski
Jim Sterling is like the uncle we all had that our parents told us was awful but he was really cool.

... And he didn't rape us. Physically at least.
Knivy's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 20:18
Knivy
Chad is half asian!! The secret is out!
gatorsax2010's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 21:10
gatorsax2010
Jim Sterling and Destructoid is a prejudice!

Clearly, this was written by some PC loving, Jim-hating homophobe. Who apparently hates Chad, too.
Everyday Legend's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 21:29
Everyday Legend
Dude, you have a Wikipedia page that gets rampant rewrites.

You, good sir, have "made it."
aborto thefetus's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 21:32
aborto thefetus
I like how he accuses you of being a homophobe in one fact and then accuses you of having sex with Chad in another. He also accuses you of being racist and then says chad is half asian like it is a bad thing.

This has to be a joke. If it isn't I have lost all hope for humanity.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/16/2009 21:33
Jim Sterling
The plot thickens:

http://boards.polycount.net/showthread.php?s=94677e6b68aadb72db26304efe700ecc&t=65488&page=4

It's possible that the vandalizing was a result of the Darkest of Days review. Seriously.
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