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Alternate Reviewality: Too Human
Jim Sterling | 8:12 PM on 09.02.2008 61 comments




What can I say about Silicon Knights' masterpiece, Too Human, that hasn't already been said before? From its engaging and enthralling storyline to the kind of gameplay that should have been seen in the medium six years ago, Too Human is an unrelenting triumph that grabs hold of the player and refuses to let go. From the moment you insert the disc into the Xbox 360 to that climactic moment when the end credits roll, you will be little more than a helpless fish caught on the end of a line. The bait? Awesome exposition. The hook? Rock solid gameplay. And the fisherman? Only the greatest mind this unworthy industry has been honored to ever know.

The story behind Too Human is as brilliant as it is fantastic. Taking on the role of Baldur, you are a member of The Aesir, a band of Godlike beings sworn to protect humanity from a race of murderous machines. The sheer genius of Denis Dyack's wonderfully crafted tale that seamlessly blends Norse myth and sci-fi trappings is at times subtly perfect and at others Earth-shatteringly rousing. After experiencing the first chapter of this epic saga in full, I felt ... insignificant. Pathetic, even, to think that I had the sheer nerve to exist in the same world as such effortlessly superb narrative.

If the story is terrific, then the gameplay is impeccable. Using a unique and innovative analog stick combat system, Silicon Knights has redefined in-game action as we know it. Taking down hordes of robotic enemies -- brilliantly given names like goblins and dark elves -- is a blast and so simple to perform, you'll feel like you're doing nothing at all. However, you ARE doing something -- you are taking part ... conspiring, if you will ... in something that will turn the videogames industry on its head. Mark my words, Too Human is the future of gaming, and that makes for a future so bright, you may very well scar your retinas if you look too long into it.

Of particular note is the hauntingly beautiful Valkyrie cutscene that we are privileged to view every time Baldur dies. The way that it runs through the game as a central theme is incredibly poignant and simply gets more interesting, engrossing and stunningly astounding every time you see it. It's so deep and philosophical that sometimes I almost felt like crying -- like throwing the controller to the floor and swiftly following it, crooking the knee and weeping nakedly before the power that is Too Human -- possibly the greatest interactive experience that has ever been created.

This game is everything I wanted and more. No other title has done anything to surpass the accomplishment that is Too Human, and I don't think anything will come close until Silicon Knights bests itself yet again with Too Human 2. If I have one criticism of the game, it's that I know we only have two more sequels in the works. If I had it my way, this franchise would continue forever and ever.

Having closed the book on this chapter of the Too Human sage -- a trilogy set to humble Tolkein himself -- all I can say is thank you. Thank you, Silicon Knights, for changing my life forever, in the most beautiful way possible.

Score: 11 (The best game ever made.)



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50 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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Murumasa123's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 20:43
Murumasa123
LOL at least here you can get out all your aggresion that you cant say in a review.
Pretty professional of you id say Jim.
Murumasa123's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 20:48
Murumasa123
Oh the lower section of the picture needs more of a focal point to draw us into the depth of the forced reality impoessed by the precense of the central character.

I suggest a penis, or perhaps an open cunt Valkyrie though I do understand this is your art.
Puppy Licks's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 20:52
Puppy Licks
You divided by zero didn't you?
Y0j1mb0's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 20:59
Y0j1mb0
The overpowering stench of sarcasm aroused me.
king3vbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:07
king3vbo
<3 indeed
Aaron Mxy Yost's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:10
Aaron Mxy Yost
Oh no, someone opened the portal to Bizarro World!
randombullseye's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:11
randombullseye
"This thing is picking up nothing but sarcasm."

Zen Albatross's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:12
Zen Albatross
Jim, I could read you journalistic derision for hours on end <3
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:16
pendelton21
Fuck you, Jim, for being a sheep and defending Too Human like everyone else!
aborto thefetus's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:17
aborto thefetus
Good thing about this is that none of the front page trolls will read this.
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:17
Sharpless
Where the fuck is Hookah? Bring him in here, maybe this'll shut him up.

I can't wait until 3 Human. (And I keep going to type "hymen" instead of "human." Fuck.)
nebones's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:18
nebones
<3333333
wickdswagger's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:23
wickdswagger
Wow, this is the first review I've read for this game. I thought I'd have more fun smacking my balls with Thor's hammer itself, but this sounds revolutionary to me.

viva la Too Human!
Samit Sarkar's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:23
Samit Sarkar
I love you, Jim Sterling.
Murumasa123's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:24
Murumasa123
If Jim was a real bastard he would draw Hookah into the picture but i doubt he is that mean. Or mabye didnt think of it yet...
Brian Szabelski's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:28
Brian Szabelski
I must buy this now that Sterling approves of it.
Detry's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:32
Detry
I'm hard
TheDreadHawk's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:35
TheDreadHawk
YES. I JUST ORDERED IT!
scorpius's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:45
scorpius
Jim you are the greatest. :-)
falinter's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 21:58
falinter
Jim Sterling reviews are the ONLY reviews I need!
RJG's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 22:35
RJG
I sure do love you, Mr. Jim. If you ever come to Australia, I won't mock your whinging pom-ness.
Maurice Tan's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 22:46
Maurice Tan
They should definitely let you review Two Human.
Bob Muir's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 22:50
Bob Muir
What.
ace of knaves's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 23:14
ace of knaves
Now I truly understand. The title Too Human refers to the reviewer, and his impossible task. For only a higher being could effectively understand and communicate the infinite facets of the game's brilliance.
GohanGVO's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 23:28
GohanGVO
oh outman







(anagram)
Kyousuke Nanbu's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/02/2008 23:40
Kyousuke Nanbu
So rather than take the high road you start a blog acting like a petulant child, very mature, I can see why the D-toid likes you much, you're just like them.
Skribble's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 00:04
Skribble
god dammit, shut the FUCK up kyousuke
Rifter01's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 00:11
Rifter01
What did the flower pot say on the way down..? Oh god, not again!

42/10!!
deanhatescoffee's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 00:12
deanhatescoffee
Jim, you rule.
FlatTopJesus's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 00:28
FlatTopJesus
That's more like it. Though your post gets 2/10.
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 00:46
Sharpless
@Hookah
Jim has written for IGN, bud.
Steel Squirrel's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 02:15
Steel Squirrel
I like humans too!
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 03:15
Sharpless
@Hookah
It was freelance work. One doesn't usually stay with a particular publication, when the work submitted to said publication is freelance work. Because then it wouldn't... be... free... lance... work... anymore...

And nope, not applying for a job. I just defend those that deserve defending, and antagonize those who are being dimwitted, unfair pricks. You're just in the right place at the right time, babycakes. ^_^ Also, you're suggesting that being gay is lame? Hmm, interesting...
Krow's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 03:56
Krow
Wait. Regular Robin is straight? Bizzaro world indeed.
B-Radicate's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 06:39
B-Radicate
Now you're just being an ignorant prick, Hookah.

Go lick Denis Dyack's balls somewhere else. We don't need you around here. You bring nothing to the table.
Torzelan's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 06:58
Torzelan
Oh Jim. How do I manlove thee? Let me count the ways...
Mushman's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 07:03
Mushman
OH SHIT NO


The sarcasm is strong in this one, jedi.
galagabug 's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 08:12
galagabug
LOL. nice, is that screenshot in game? LOOKS MIND BLOWING!
Murumasa123's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 09:08
Murumasa123
Dammit who was tailed by Hookah!
Oh no Jim, Malone said soemthign bad about you in a comment on the internets! Now you may never recover.. you better commit sappuku.
Btw its just a review Hookah which YOU started going on about so stop getting off on people shouting at you and thinking anyone cares what you think. Oh and if you post in the next review or article about this then you really are quite sad.
NotAZombie's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 09:39
NotAZombie
Just ignore Hookah, all he's looking for is attention. Jim already figured this out so just stop replying to him.
KGBrAm's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 10:47
KGBrAm
I don't know what is served by writing this post Jim...I think you are taking this writing gig a little too seriously mate.

I've rarely agreed with your reviews and it's easier to just agree to disagree, I enjoy the writings you put out but man...you have to stop taking this so personally! This post is kinda out of place imo.

<3
Crackpot360's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 15:50
Crackpot360
Huh, 11? Just 11 for the game Jesus himself would actually have bothered to play instead of saving us from sin.
You Sr. Jim are wrongz. WRONGZ because I am write.

Sir If an employee for Silly-cone Knights spits on the floor, that spit gets at least a 20 out of 10. Learn how to score correctly. Good day.
VisMortua's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/03/2008 18:55
VisMortua
Greatest fucking review ever. How would it be said? 11 old ladies punched in the face, 11 chocobos ridden, 11 best weeks ever/slurpees, or in how you should have said it Jim, 11 straight ejaculations.
Quest's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/04/2008 07:22
Quest
too human rulez .... what a great game ... i enjoy it so much :D
syrionus's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/04/2008 19:13
syrionus
See Jim "The Haterade" Sterling, this is why you are not taken seriously. You pollute the internet with random ignorant thoughts. You believe because you have a position on a subject, that everyone else who doesn't it wrong. Your opinions are not facts.

Most of the comments are from puppets too. Can anyone think for themselves? It looks like Denis is right.
Variable Gear's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/04/2008 20:10
Variable Gear
Too Human is actually pretty fun. It's not as fun as this review seems to indicate, but it's fun.
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