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Ah observation from an observant observationist
Jim Sterling \| 12:09 PM on 05.14.2008	53 comments

On the one hand, you have people bagging on Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts because it's a totally different approach to the formula and completely shakes up the original gameplay.

On the other hand, you have people bagging on Gears of War 2 because it's not taking a totally different approach to the formula and gives us more of the original gameplay.

I have run these findings through my scientific test-o-meter robot (built out of science):

Here are the results, which I think you will agree are dramatic findings indeed:

I hope this has been informative. Thank you very much.

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48 comments | showing # 1 to 48

blehman

Hmmmmmm...*strokes beard*...fascinating observation there Jim. Yes, given the opportunity, most people will bitch about anything.

taumpytears

You need to trademark cuntbiscuit.

Kryptinite

Agreed.

Also, I wonder what cuntbiscuits taste like.

bmdubya

See my comment on this story.
Comments

Chocobo Knight

Shirts need to be made!

Butmac

Who the fuck is Jim Sterling?

king3vbo

Hmm... I guess I just like to bitch about everything

Neonie

It all makes sense now.

njsykora

I bitch about Banjo because I love the franchise and don't want to see it dicked up the spout for the sake of innovation.

blehman

Actually now that I think about it, I'll bitch about your blog title. It's too short and there isn't enough alliteration in it. It should read "An Astute Observation from an Astutely Observant Observationalist". For shame.

wardrox

I'll be honest, I cant find any flaw in your logic.

mix

I'll have my biscuit toasted and buttered with strawberry jam please.

MaxVest

But what if... what if there are TWO SEPARATE GROUPS OF PEOPLE WHO CANNOT BE SIMULTANEOUSLY SATISFIED??? Science help us all.

Also, my default position on anything is opposition.

gotdurnrite

Everyone's a Cuntbiscuit It's that a song? If not it needs to be.

bmdubya

@ njskyora: But what if Rare showed us video and it was exactly like the N64 versions with better graphics. Would you be happy that they kept it the same, or would you bitch that it is the same game with hi-res graphics?

Rockvillian

Man I had to dust off my Ponderin' Bot� to verify your research

Brian Keljore

That scientific piece of wonderment should see a doctor, as blood in your urine is a serious sign that something is wrong. Maybe it was something it scienced.

BlackSheep

so...

the answer of who the fuck is jim sterling is:

cuntbiscuit?

Rifter01

The internetz seem to bring out the douchiest (or in terms of something wheat or biscuit-like, doughiest) in folks. I'm still pondering which is a more furry-friendly game, Animal Crossing or Banjo-Kazooie. On one hand, I think AC deff.. But, it isn't actually very fur-themed. I dunno I'm so con-fur-sed lolol

DaTgUy

LMAO, I just spit coffee on my computer

Brian Szabelski

Cuntbiscuits - Part of a nutritious breakfast!

Ocified-Xboxer

Jim, because this actually makes sense, you should run. Run far, and run as fast as a portly British video game journalist can...You should know better than to make sense on the internet. I'll call when it is safe to come out.

Ocified-Xboxer

And I would like to add that while I enjoy the word cuntbiscuit a great deal, I'm not Jimpressed by it.

Dynamic Sheep

Science has created the ultimate breakfast creation... CUNT BISCUITS! Harnessing the power of the sun in a chip is child's play when compared to the awesome that is cunt biscuits!

Droll

That's how we do things in MURICA.
When they change the fundemental gamplay:travesty.
When they keep the gameplay the same: insipid.
We can have our cake and masterbate into it too!
MmmmmUrica!

Sharpless

I'm going to be an asshole and write a serious response. Don't you think it's entirely possible for one game to need to stick closer to formula, while another would do better to shake things up? I don't give a damn about Banjo-Kazooie (there, I said it) but I have no problem with Gears sticking closer to formula. But there are certainly games that need new stuff.

I'm just saying, while people ARE cuntbiscuits who complain about everything, these complaints aren't necessarily illegitimate in this case.

PetiePal

Where does he get those wonderful toys...

-D-

I could go for some cuntbiscuits and gravy, now that you mention it.

McSnow

Complaining about complaining?
Have I accidentally stumbled into Wardrox's blog?

Knivy

Really? Everyone? I thought it was only me! Thanks for cheering me up Jim :).

@Rocky
You and your mechanical army :P

bottled dark

at least im consistent.
I hate the new Banjo-Kazooie idea, want the new gears, and cant wait for Pokemon Platinum.

Consistency!

big filth

Mr. Jimmles, you know I agree with this wholeheartedly since I basically made that comment with the same example in an earlier post of yours. Well done fine sir.

blehman

I like how noone has observed the typo in the title. There's no "h" in an.

Y0j1mb0

Fascinating.

Jim Sterling

blehman: You don't know it's an "an." I mean be saying "Ah, observation," in revelation.

YOU DO NOT KNOW!

blehman

LOL, true.

kawitchate

@Jim

B-K came out years ago and the platformer is dying as a genre so i think people just wanted more of the same there. also, it's more of a "childhood" game (even though it didn't come out THAT long ago) and people want their childhood game sequels/remakes to be rather the same as the original.

GoW2 just came out a year and a half ago. there are tons of shooter clones on the market just like it. i see no reason why people wouldn't call for a little innovation, a little change.

Bob Muir

Hypothetically, where can I buy these cuntbiscuits?

ArrestedDeveloper

I'm Arrested Developer and I approved this message.

Velt

i want one of those robots so bad...

BFeld13

Confused...

MatCD

I give it a chance if the vehicle building is optional (IE, there's an auto-build option)

Samit Sarkar

You�ll soon find cuntbiscuits at your local supermarket, made by Nabisco.

itemforty

zombiekiller13

People who complain about a game changing + People complaining about a game not changing = EA's approach to each year's Madden game...ignore both sides and do whatever the fuck you want. Seems to be working out well for them.

Or, on the other hand, take Castlevania...people wanted something new, they got 3D Castlevanias. They then complained about that, they got 2D Castlevanias again. And the world rejoiced.

Also, cuntbiscuits is totally going into my vocabulary, right next to 'fucktard' and 'jizz-gullet'.

flaming burrito

heh he said cuntbiscuit

balth

I concur with my esteemed colleague and his tried-and-true empirical evidence and scientific deductions.

Also,

AgentMOO

*snake* What's this - a groinal tubing? In a military base?

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