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JLanphear's blog

2:42 AM on 08.25.2009

Why I truly love Destructoid.

Fuck this meme.

For cereal.

Getting me all choked up and reminiscing.

Nevermind, it's actually kind of nice to reminisce and think of the several reasons that I truly love Destructoid. The biggest reason that I love Destructoid actually hearkens back to the very first time I had ever heard of the minuscule video game blog.

I was browsing the massive plethora of video game blogs that I ran through (I had yet to decide on one), when a story caught my eye on Kotaku. This happened long, long ago. The story was linked to a blog here on Destructoid, in which one of the sites community members, a contest winner, had made a video of himself unboxing his contest prize. The prize happened to be a gigantic box of crap, containing loose demo discs, controllers, and just an overall mix of everything that could possibly fit in the box.

"This is amazing," I thought to myself. "What kind of professional blog would send their contest winners this crap?" That's when I decided to look around further. I went to the home page and just wandered for hours. Looking through the stories, realizing more and more as I read, that this place was different. There was an air of obscurity about Destructoid that could not be ignored. From then on, I visited Destructoid practically every day. Slowly but surely stopping my visitation of other various gaming blogs, yet still retaining my identification as a lurker of Destructoid. Afraid to register in fear of being ridiculed for perhaps not being. . . strange enough for the crowd. Or knowledgeable enough for the group of hardcore gamers whose knowledge seemed to all but obliterate my own.

Then one day, in the year 2006, I decided to register. I signed up, and of course felt no different. Except that I now had a name. I had a face (so to speak). I had a voice.

I began to comment on a few stories here and there. Only those that I knew my voice wouldn't sound like that of a moronic 12-year old wishing to seem smarter. But as I continued browsing, my love for the community grew. Everyone on Destructoid had the stench of un-professionalism about them, and it was gorgeous. Destructoid was the only serious video game blog on the internet, that didn't take itself seriously.

Early on in my Destructoid career, I felt that I gained a slight reputation for being a contest winner. Generally winning those that required photoshop work. Of course, since I rarely said anything, I couldn't have possibly gained a reputation, but I was proud of myself nonetheless.

After a while, I stopped commenting. Never posted on the forums. Never did anything. Until a few months ago. When I just decided that I would completely fit in here. That I was born to be here. That on the internet, this place wasn't just some obscure video game blog that attracted the knowledgeable, and the badass. That it was THE video game blog.

Sorry about not having pictures or anything, and make such a long blog. But I felt this meme required, and inspired, more spoken word, than anything. *tear*
</longblog>   read

3:55 PM on 07.11.2009

Final Fantasy Gaiden: 4 Warriors of Light Gameplay


Yeah, so gameplay of Final Fantasy Gaiden: 4 Warriors of Light is online, and it is beautiful. I'm actually really excited for this game as it looks like it's going to be incredible, and yet another step up for the capabilities of the DSi, at least in my opinion. I know there are those here on Destructoid not too keen on the game, but I respectfully disagree.

For those that are actually anticipating this game, what do you think of the gameplay so far? (Just to be clear, it's not the top of my list though, that goes to Soul Silver)

[via Tiny Cartridge   read

9:53 PM on 07.05.2009

Monthly GET: Swag Haul Win.

So, this month I really didn't get very many games as I was completely fucked from every possible angle by my wonderful bank that couldn't possibly be Bank of America. After $400 in fees, games quickly became scarce prey for myself.

However, I endured and was still able to come away with a few goodies. Especially in part due to the AWESOME Anime Expo that yielded many, many goodies in its furry-loving wake.

For the Xbox 360 this month, I pretty much got jack shit as far as selection goes, but as far as awesomeness goes, BlazBlue made sure to help me out. I got the Limited Edition (just like everyone else I hope) and can proudly say that not only do I absolutely love the game, but I adore Taokaka. Oh yeah. . . I said it. . .

For the original Xbox I snatched up Dead or Alive: Xtreme Beach Volleyball, and the ever-awesome Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance. Thus increasing my Metal Gear Solid collection more, as that is the point. I've played them all but seem to own very few of them for some strange fucking reason. I would like to point out that I bought BOTH of these games, for $8. ;)

For the Playstation 2, I grabbed Unlimited SaGa for $4.00 and also managed to get my hands on another Metal Gear Solid game, Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater. I've played through it with my friend, Aaron, but never owned the game to try to get my hands on all the cool shit, well. . . now's the time.

And definitely the biggest category this month is without a doubt the video game swag category, as thanks to AX I managed to get my hands on tons of fucking awesome swag.

Starting at the bottom and going from right to left: The long cloth is a Taokaka cloth/towel thing that I couldn't resist having. The BlazBlue artbook is directly above that. The blue squares are actually Puchi BlazBlue folders that were given with the AX Bundle for BlazBlue, and the bag above them is the incredibly hefty canvas bag that it all came in. Next to the bag is an autographed print from Evangelion 1.0 (autographed by the new voices of Rei, and Eva 01), I know it's not video game related but it's still awesome. Directly next to and under that is a freakin awesome Japanese advertisement for the King of Fighters '98 Ultimate Match. In the upper left corner is a Disgaea 2 DANGER Sticker (AWESOME!) and a Disgaea 2 Trading Figure, as well as Neo Steam cellphone strap (I was also given a Neo Steam poster, and t-shirt) from Atlus. Underneath those is a mint in-box Cyborg Ninja figure from McFarlane's first MGS run of action figures, and last but not least, underneath that, is a RIDICULOUSLY awesome Japanese-style Prinny fan that the NIS America booth was giving with each purchase.

So, just as I said, games: not too many this month. But swag. . . Jesus. I came across a pretty fair share thanks to the glory that is the convention. :)   read

3:14 PM on 06.17.2009

Another New Tingle Advertisement in Famitsu

Tiny Cartridge posted a scan of the latest advertisement for the new Tingle game that is apparently in the works for the Nintendo DS.

The text on the advertisement translates to "Ah!" and there's a teaser site for the game now as well. The teaser site has three features. One of them is some creepy tarot card mini game or something, another is what appears to be some sort of e-mail thing (likely to confess your undying love to someone in the creepiest fucking way possible), and the last one is a TV with the date June 18th on it. Obviously, we'll get a trailer for the game tomorrow.

I'm personally a fan of Tingle. His other games have been fun, and it's nice to see that his strangely unique character is appreciated in some form over at Nintendo. This one better not be a goddamn Club Nintendo game again though, or I will be pissed.   read

4:54 PM on 05.30.2009

Everyone Else Has: E309 Predictions

It would seem that the big topic among the community blogs as of late has been the creation of everyone's own Electronic Entertainment Expo predictions. Some of them have been serious, and a couple quite accurate as of late. Others, were created just for a laugh, with the hopes and dreams of their creators tucked neatly inside their pocket (Jet Set Radio Online *shivers with delight*).

E3 is the event for gamers. We've all dreamt of attending this place. Dreams of going there and meeting the creators of these items that stole away our childhood. A few short years ago, it seemed that those dreams would never come again when E3 was downsized to an industry-only event, but here we are. Back to where we started with the convention to rule all conventions now seated atop its rightful pedestal.

Just as it should be, many things have changed since the last public E3 occurred. The positions of our favorite companies have completely switched around. It's been quite a ride, and it will be interesting to see how the show affects the standings of the big three companies this year.


Nintendo is a giant among giants right now, with its practical standing leading the pack of vicious and rabid wolves now known as "casual gamers". However, in making this change, they've generally alienated those that got them where they are. The "hardcore gamer". The player that sits down and plays Nintendo's long-winded epic adventures, and always lays in wait for the next installment. I wish I could say that they'll make up for that this year but I honestly don't believe it to be true. We'll undoubtedly see more Zelda: Spirit Tracks at E3, which is a wonderful appetizer. But, it's highly unlikely we'll see a major Mario or Zelda announcement this year, unless it's some sort of Mario sports game, which could very well happen. Also expect to see a bit of Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Winter Games show up in the press conference as well.

They'll likely announce a few more key WiiWare titles, and if we're lucky we'll also get a peek at a few worthwhile DSiWare offerings. Preferably we'll get some WarioWare: Made in Ore over here, as well as some Higurashi Puzzle Katamari Damacy. Given the success and critical fare that the Art Style series of games have been receiving it's likely we'll see at least one more of those on the shelf as well.


Expect Microsoft to have a huge show this year. I have no doubt we'll get word on Final Fantasy XIII, and Microsoft will probably push the shit out of it at their keynote. The amount of games that the 360 has coming this year is massive, so they'll likely be showing many games we already know about. There's also an incredibly slim possibility that we may have a Crackdown 2 announcement given the release of the premium theme (don't count on it though).

I expect Xbox Primetime to be the biggest item on the agenda at this years show for Microsoft. The service has already garnered incredible amounts of attention, and with the U.S. beta of 1 vs. 100 going Live this Monday, there's going to be plenty to say about it. I also expect to hear something regarding Netflix on Xbox Live as well, since it seems Microsoft always has something up their sleeve in regards to video on the 360.

As far as games go, the biggest push of the show will be Halo 3: ODST, where they will probably reveal a new trailer, as well as gameplay. Also look for a quick "shoutout" to Alan Wake, which we still have yet to really see anything of. There will without a doubt also be news on "The Ballad of Gay Tony", the second DLC pack for Grand Theft Auto IV. Mass Effect 2 will also no doubt make an appearance in the keynote. Lastly, they will more than likely push the Gears of War 2: All Fronts collection, in an attempt to sell the rest of us the action shooter.


This show is without a doubt one of the most important shows in the history of the Playstation brand. The Playstation 3 was lagging incredibly far behind at first, but has slowly been gaining speed, and they have to capitalize on that momentum. Which I expect them to do. Sony is going to have a huge show on all fronts not only displaying several key titles, but unveiled the new PSP Go! which we have already seen (and I believe to be quite bland).

On the PSP front, the PSP Go, will be the big deal, and will likely be a large part of the keynote, along with a few major titles to go along with it. One of which will be a new Metal Gear title, as well as the long fabled Gran Turismo PSP finally being unveiled.

For the Playstation 3, expect there to be MORE Final Fantasy XIII news, making it the most pushed game of the entire show. There will also no doubt be Uncharted 2 on the topic list, as well as more MAG-related news. I also expect to see the "Substance" version of Metal Gear Solid 4 make a short appearance as well. With any luck, we might also get to see a sliver of Katamari Damacy TRIBUTE as well, though I wouldn't bet on it too much. Home will also get some attention with news on a few new spaces as well as the alternate reality game, Xi. Finally, the Playstation Network will get a massive push with news of several important PSN classics being added, as well as a couple major PSN games announced.

So, clearly E3 is going to be an important show for everyone, us included. Now, these are just predictions so, some of them could be completely wrong, others have already been confirmed by leaks and press releases, so take some of it with a grain of salt. So, what do you think?   read

10:59 PM on 05.24.2009

Monthly GET: It's Been a LONG While Edition

Well Gentleman, and Ladies, it has been a long ass time since I posted on Destructoid. I've been practicing my lurking in the high up mountains of the Andes, focusing my skills of not saying anything for what seems like years, and I feel that my training has reached its peak physical condition. Therefore, I believe it's time I start posting again, even though I rarely posted to begin with.

One of my favorite features I've seen around here are the GET features where people show off what they've purchased lately, and I would like to join this crowd! :D However, I'm a poor man, and to try to avoid a lack of complete fail blog on my part, I'm gonna hold off and only post this once a month so that my posts can tend to be worthwhile and meaningful. :)

So, lets begin! Round 1!

For 360, I finally picked up a copy of Dead Rising seeing as how the sequel is being released soon (eventually?) and I figure I should at least beat the first one before playing the second. I also picked up a copy of Mirrors Edge which I scored from Game Play on Venice Blvd. (thanks DtoidLA for the suggestion!) for a mere $18 after tax! Muahaha! Lastly, I picked up Raiden Fighters Aces, which is probably one of the best deals on the 360, as it only costs $20 and provides plenty of vertical-shooter fun. I discovered a demo of it on the Japanese Live Marketplace, decided to try it out, and immediately ran out and bought it upon discovering it was released in America.

For PS2, I had a bit of a better haul seeing as it was all used, and generally inexpensive, but well worth it. I picked up Metal Gear Solid 2, which was shocking to find as the box is in near MINT condition, along with the game. Final Fantasy XII, non-greatest hits, near mint. Samurai Legend Musashi, awesome game and well worth the small change it cost. I also picked up ChoroQ which is an amusingly fun racing game from Atlus, as well as Persona 3, though sadly the P3 is not the limited edition version with the artbook.

A few months back, my DS Lite was stolen (along with my Gyakuten Saiban wrist strap T_T) right out of my room, along with my copy of The World Ends With You, so I haven't bought any DS games for the last several months. But late last month I picked up a DSi, and am rather happy with it to be honest. I'm finally able to buy more games for it, and Professor Layton (not pictured) was my first purchase. My immediate second purchase was Apollo Justice (not pictured), and lastly, my third and most recent DS purchase is the Limited Edition of DokiDoki Majo Shinpan! 2 DUO. It's a pretty fun game, though not being able to understand Japanese TOO well makes it rather difficult to play. You can see more pictures of the Limited Edition of that over at my Tomopop Blog.

Finally, also on my trip to Game Play and Spin Fusion on Venice Blvd. I purchased the Japanese version of Space Channel 5 for the Sega Dreamcast, as well as a MINT and working Dreamcast VMU. The VMU, if you can believe it, only cost me $2! TWO DOLLARS! I was drawn to the Space Channel 5 by the incredibly sparkly manual in the front, and just couldn't help myself.

Well, that's my first Monthly GET post here at Destructoid. Hope you enjoyed it.

On another note, as I have been gone a VERY long time from the postings of Destructoid, perhaps an introduction is due for those of you who don't know me, which I imagine is quite a few of you. I'm JLanphear, but my real is Josh. I've been a member of Destructoid for just over 2 years, and proudly say that they're the only gaming site I truly support. I currently live in Los Angeles, CA and attend school for Graphic Design. I'm a longtime gamer, and have been gaming for most of my life, since my first NES, which my mom bought me at a garage sale when I was young. I play pretty much every type of game, and welcome suggestions from all angles. My Xbox Live is PhearL3SS for those of who want to play. :)

Well, that's it for me. That's all I've got. . . what a text heavy post. Haha. Hope you didn't fall asleep reading it! :D

Also, cocks.   read

10:45 PM on 02.24.2008

New Destructoid is NEW and AWESOME!

I must say guys, the new DTOID looks fan-fucking-tastic! I'll probably avoid Fall of Liberty but
goddamn this place looks HAWT!

This is probably the nicest I have EVER seen this place, even better than Bioshock. And
Bioshock was fucking sweet. Well done to the crew of Destructoid. :)   read

8:54 PM on 02.18.2008

OMG, on WWE...

So, I was watching WWE RAW like literally 20 seconds ago, and there was a big ass
Destructoid robot sign in the crowd. You should be able to see it as its around in the area
where the camera tends to congregate mostly, showing the majority of the ring.

It's badass. And an awesome representation of how amazing Destructoid is. A sign about a
gaming website at a "Sports" event. Check it out. :O   read

1:54 AM on 08.21.2007

Costume Crashers!: The most Awesome costume EVAR.

It takes someone of massive lose to not respect the creator of this epic costume. It's masterly crafted exterior is a thing of beauty of a glorious testament to the awesome game that Castle Crashers will be. It's awesome that a simple looking game like this is garnering so much attention. Especially in a world where Halo, Gears of War, and Bioshock rule.* It goes to show how dedicated us gamers truly are. We respect a game for what its made of. Not how much hype it has behind it.

You can check out a full gallery of the costume HERE.

*NOTE - Bioshock FTW. lol.   read

7:35 AM on 08.19.2007

Limited Edition!: JLanphear Community Blog

As I'm sure the entirety of the internet knows at this point, Destructoid is holding a HUGE contest, with the prize being the brand spankin' new PSTriple 80GB Motorstorm Bundle. And of course, as I am NOT the proud owner of a Playstation 3, I shall try my damnedest to get one of these sleek black powerhouses. I'm going to start this round of the contest* by proclaiming to the community of Destructoid that I revamped my seckzeh community blog to get ahead of the game here! Of course, thousands of other members will be flocking to try to win, forcing the end result to be thousands of seizure inducing pieces of crap that only count as entries because the slightest resemblance of our bloodthirsty hero is there.

As you can see, I, on the other hand, have stepped up the game in the hopes of gaining the upper hand, by recreating the scene found in the artwork using my banner, and About Me sections of my community blog. Of course, I won't get any extra ballots for this wonderful work of awesomeness, but at least I'll look cooler than the noobs who are only here in the hopes of winning the Grand Prize.

Anyways, let me know what you guys think of my new Limited Edition look! :D

*NOTE: This contest is NOT round-based. It was only a figure of speech and I do not know anything you don't know. Or do I?   read

6:52 PM on 08.09.2007

Dtoid looks f'ing sweet right now...

Srsly guys...the whole Bioshock look is fucking amazing. Nice job with it. It makes Dtoid look so fuckin ominous. I LOVE IT.

The way you guys even put detail into the menu is awesome, really brings out the look.

Also, I need to update my blog more. Like make it look sweet or some blog   read

4:41 PM on 06.05.2007

VROOOOM! Destructoid pwns Forza 2 and its roads

Well, in the Forza 2 custom paintjob post, I stated that I would be making a Destructoid Forza 2 paintjob. And, because I'm a man of my word, I have. This is pushing about 600 total layers, and is about 6-7 hours worth of work.

I would like to be sure that you guys know, the positioning for everything is not going to be perfect. I was at a friends house when I made this last night and the TV I was using wasn't the greatest thing. It was a 24" blurry crap-o-vision but I did my best.

Hope you guys like it!


Click each link for the appropriate image of the car. Maybe next time there will be unappropriate images of the car. :O   read

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