That was a gun in his pocket and he is not happy to see you.
I'm going to talk about the entire game meaning that... spoilers. There will be spoilers. Not that I think most people will care given its been over a month since the game came out meaning that people in need of a murder fix are likely shooting people up in Farcry 3 or some other game.
Let me just say this very plainly and very directly. Hitman absolution has major issues with human sexuality. Even though the story takes itself seriously and has a major focus on its characters. I cannot enjoy the story/character aspect of it especially with how against sex the entire experience is. What do I mean by that well keep reading and hopefully I’ll explain well enough. Or you'll write angry comments. Either way that's more attention, supposedly a good thing.
People as a whole are operating under curtain wants, desires problems exct...
And while the character of 47 obviously has problems to deal with there's something lacking within him that turns him into such an inhuman character. Its not that he's a player insert, that helps but it goes farther then that. 47 even more directly does not have any sex drive or intimacy. He's a cold lifeless killing machine who displays no emotion, and while its great for making a player insert that can do any and all sorts of horrible things and remain in character. That does not make a character you can relate to.
The closest I can think of is the end of Blood money. The character of Diana wakes him up from a drug induced coma with a kiss. Maybe there's more but that's the only thing I can remember that involved any actual human intimacy with 47 from the games ive played(please comment if you can think of more.
The closest and rather as its depicted wrongest moment between Diana and 47 in absolution is the assassination of her during the first mission. The devs for some reason decided to have Diana in the shower showing off how vulnerable and sexy she is right before you gun her down in the shower. This too to me is at least some sort of hint that at least as far as 47 goes he may have some kind of feeling for Diana its also probably the only human moment I can remotely think of in the actual game with him. (mabye the hallway with Victoria) Too bad the devs didn't actually flesh him out.
The various mistakes he makes could have been explained away as him having to deal with emotions of a sort. Its ridicules to me that you can perfectly complete a segment in absolution only to have your character do something increasingly stupid. 47 steps into several obvious traps thought the game and yet is supposed to be the best assassin in the world. Either a prefect assassin or a flawed human being a character can't be both.
Instead he's just 47 throughout the entire game.
Ok so you have a mostly sexless main character. In comparison the vast majority of the cast are sexual deviants. Which is used to emphasis how horrible they are as people. Lets go over a good majority of the charecter and list their sexual deviance’s and the few that aren't.
Sadist and possible necrophiliac.
Evidance for such.
If you lose while trying to kill him he'll say that he's going to rape 47s corpse if this is just supposed ot be an insult that still turns it into a negative since his mind went there.
When he dies he says “Why do I have wood. Meaning that he's taken sexual pleasure from the exchange.
In the mission to kill her If you wait until she goes into her panic room then fallow her inside she'll strip before pulling two guns from her back to kill you.
The Sherrif of hope engages in S&M Practices with his lover. These are played for comedic effect. Both get guned down in rather pathedic situations. Clive after getting shot in the leg and his lover after being used as a double for Victoria who the villain just kills for no good reason.
Benjamin Alexander Travis
While not displaying any overt sexual deviant. He's the guy who made the Saints AKA the dominatrix nuns you kill in the game. So i'll just put down that he has some warped fetishes.
This is a weird on to me because like 47 they don't show off any kind of interest in sex. The closest thing to any human interaction is getting excited at the prospect of killing a legend like 47. During this cinematic it seems as if Travis (whos calling them) is interrupting some sort of S&M fetish scene that some old business man paid them to do. This turn out to be false and they quickly kill the man with a knife to the head. I still have no idea why they bothered to kidnap him and take his cloths off. Then again I have no idea the kind of person who would agree to dress up as dominatrix nuns. What little charecterization that is given to them is expunged by two random Hitmen in the first level you kill them in. They have just as much depth as 47 IE Not a lot.
She plays the role of the innocent gril in the game which 47 tries to pertect from becoming a hitman like he was. He fails at this and she murders a good 10 odd guards by the end of the game. Way to protect her innocence 47. If it sounds like i'm not focusing on her its because she's nothing but a innocent mcguffin.
The only thing he's interested in is money or guns..actually what the hell was he after? I guess he's whatever the devs need to further the plot.
This is the one case on the major character on the villians side where there's not much I can say. She's just a secretary other then dressing slightly sexy there isn't really anything aobut her other then she wan't a career and thinks ill of her boss. Ironicly we get more of her then Victoria and myself I felt bad that she stuck around such a obviously losing scenario towards the end of the game. So i'll put her in the better developed then most of the cast rating. Not that she's particularly strong. Everyone else just feels cartoony for lack of a better word.
Get's called limp dick by his own dad
While he has had 2 wifes is completely motivated by Money (He's willing to piss of a large assassin organization for 10 million when he has billions) or sadistic violence. He only seemed to get off when he murdered a house maid and framed 47 for it.
I just have trouble wrapping my head around a universe where not only is everyone rather stupid. But also any remote sexual interest is somehow beholden only to those who are evil. Meanwhile the main cast of people feel rather distant, I don't entirely think its just that far as I can tell they have no sex drive. They have relatively speaking lives that you cannot relate too. And as much as a series like uncharted you could say has character with unrelated lives at least it had human from its main cast that you could relate to. Even if Drake does kill more people then 47 arguably making him the bigger Psycho. There's just something that at least feels human about him.
Other random bits I noticed in Absolution
Why does 47 being framed for the murder of a house maid even matter. He murders people for a living. Even with all the silly things the game did they never bothered to clear him of the one murder he didn't do in the game.
I don't remember seeing Diana's face before but she always seemed to be older to me.
During the shaving Lenny mission the Corrupt cops of Hope are depicted as watching porn
Lenny Has books on how to pick up chicks.
On of your targets loves to blow up pigs with landmines. Not much I can think of with sex there it's just odd.
Post Article awards
Most annoying character
goes to Blake Dexter
for that stupid cowboy hat.
goes to the Saints
for dressing up as dominatrix’s
I'm sure there's some ritch house wives who were trying to reenact 50 Shades of Grey but couldn't due to the Saints buying all the high quality leather
Words I never want to hear in a game again
goes to 'Limp Dick
' and 'I got wood
Overall Hitman get's 50 thousandths of a second to get seen through your costume
of A Beaver Costume read