(First half is for Castle Crashers the next half is for Colette)



Fuck you. Okay maybe that's a little blunt but you are a prick. I do have to commend you on a brilliant scheme though. Convincing everyone you would provide some of the best online co op was impressive. You see though I enjoy justice but I also enjoy seeing scum pull off their little plans. Maybe that's why I find it so boring in video games when the good guys prevail. Anyway you are probably the worst things I ever spent $15 on. Not only did you not let me enjoy you with my other friends online you also (FFFFFFFFFFFFF) deleted my save file. All those hours I put into you were wasted. All that legit level grinding was for nothing.

You broke me that day. Before that dreadful incident I kept convincing myself that you were worth something. I told myself that everyone who was bitching about you were just trying to stir up shit. It never once crossed my mind that they were right. Though your gameplay was fun you were nothing more than hyped up buggy game. Your art style inspired me to start drawing again. Your music was like a gay orgy in my ear and everyone was coming. You were amazing for the first week. Every time I would start you up however I would ask myself if it was update tiams nao plz. But no....it never was. I had to deal. If I was lucky I would get to enjoy 30 minutes of you with a few of my friends. Alas hyped game I say fuck off....actually I'll probably replay you again some time. But you will always be a disappointment in my eyes. Also Mr. Paladin you have lost my trust and I will now wait before I purchase any of your games.

This is the best review for the game (go to 13:55)



Ms. Colette Bennett how are you? Good...good. Um....you were wrong. I recall in some Podtoid or RetroforceGo! episode some time ago you told everyone to STFU. I believe you said something along the lines of stop bitching and just play the single player. Now back then I would have agreed with you. But now it seems I have to point out how wrong you were. You see when a game promises something for your money it better deliver. If a new Rhythm Tengoku game came out wouldn't you be pissed if the game had terrible audio? See it's the same thing. For you to tell everyone to shut the fuck up is very very insulting. I know that Destructoid and Dan Paladin bro fist all the tiam but honestly. If the game has a broken component that many people bought the game for don't tell everyone to stop bitching when it doesn't fucking work.

I normally don't like to cause controversy (;D) but this has been on my mind every since I lost my game save. I finally accepted that Castle Crashers was a disappointment and was a waste of my money. I mean the patch that's suppose to fix all this hasn't even been mentioned in months. In the end we should really just blame ourselves. Though the gameplay, art, and music were stellar we ultimately purchased this game so we could enjoy it with our friends just like Left 4 Dead and numerous other titles. We bought the hype even after hearing how dreadful the online was. This doesn't mean we shouldn't hold The Behemoth accountable though. Their main selling point was not found in the finish product and I find it disappointing that many reviewers and gamers just brushed this off. It doesn't matter if you're Eternity's Child or Castle Crashers if you're broken in some way you should be held accountable or avoided entirely.


BTW I HAS NO REAL FWENDS