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It all began on a snowy Sunday morning. The cold chill had sent frost crystals growing up the window panes, a cold that could only be broken by the burning warmth of our loins. Then we made love . . .

Ummm . . . no. I've been gaming since Atari 2600. I moved on to Nintendo and one of my favorite consoles ever - NEC TurboGrafx 16. Ys I&II were my gateway games, followed by Final Fantasy which cemented myself, for life, as a gamer.

I went to college and started to grow into a real person, accepting responsibility and acquiring debt. My gaming habits diminished until the Xbox 360 came out, and then I was completely rejuvenated and dove back in. I have always been fascinated by innovation and the progression of technology; it's my religion, I believe in it.

I bought a PS3 when it was released and it served as a massive paper-weight for a period of time. But 2009 really showed off the consoles potential. Before I knew it I was playing almost exclusively on the PS3 and I was the first of my friends to not renew their XBL Gold Membership. I love gaming and I am very eager to jump into all of Sony's 2011 exclusives.
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This is an attempt to connect with my fellow game and tech enthusiasts through a means in which I am not entirely comfortable. Over the past few years most of my once valuable ties, relationships I grew and cultivated over time with care and patience, friends whom I have loved and cared for deeply, all have languished and withered on the tenuous vines of my apathy. This is a page in my life, do I turn that page? Do I let the past die and forgo the indignation of humility or humiliation; do I attempt to retie the loosening knots and just accept the frayed ends?

I am turning the page. It's a burden at once lifted, and yet a dark cloud will loom forever in the back of my mind. I am moving on. I want something less real, possibly manufactured? A synthesized state of being, a material from outer-space, one that is impossibly durable and flexible and void of emotion. This is what I will wear over my cold skin.

Welcome to my imaginary life.

To start off, I love Ponies and all things cute, I have never harmed or let there be harmed another living entity whether that be a person or a Ginger. And if I get hungry I just may eat you. I love my PS3, it has become my platform of choice, which was not always the case. I have a 360. I also have a PC and an iMac, neither of which I game on. Some of my favorite topics are poking fun at Little Cliffy B's diminutive stature, as well as trying to give objective opinions on games that I buy and play. I also tend to be less than objective when it comes to speculating upon things I know little about. It's all rather unconvincing and muddled, largely because I mumble. But I try, and I have heard that trying is important, but when all I do is expose myself as being inept, trying can be highly overrated.

Enough about me, for now . . .

Recently Todd Howard and Bethesda have made a lot of news with Skyrim (who comes up with these names). A continuation of the hugely popular Elder Scrolls series. As many of you know these games have been powered by what has become an embattled technology, Gamebryo. Bethesda developed games using this engine have gained notoriety for being 'bugged out'. But it is a new day and we have a new game, Skyrim, said to be powered by a completely new technology, developed in-house. Thats when I thought - wow, I'm pretty sure Todd Howard gave an interview where he stated that this new engine was built upon existing tech. So here is a statement made by Todd Howard during a Q&A with Eurogamer.com on 16 August, 2010.


Eurogamer: Is it fair to say then that it's based on existing technology?

Todd Howard: The technology is ours and it is inspired by the technology we have. We have a lot of it. But that's our starting point - the Fallout 3 tech. It started with Morrowind, we went to Oblivion, we did a lot between Oblivion and Fallout 3 because now we had final hardware - with Oblivion we had six months on final hardware, so Fallout 3 technically does a lot more than Oblivion. The new stuff is an even bigger jump from that.

Maybe I'm wrong but this doesn't seem to be the same song that is being played by all the gaming sites, the one where Todd keeps singing that it's all brand new tech. I think Bethesda is trying to distance themselves from Gamebryo. I think the backlash to the bugs may have caught up with them and they want you to believe that Skyrim is new,new,new!

After Fallout: New Vegas, I am far less likely to buy another Bethesda game, unless it has id stamped on it. I suffered through Fallout 3, because I couldn't put it down. But I became vary dismayed at the fact that they actually fixed most of the bugs, yes, fixed! Why the fuck not do this before you release the game, why treat the public as your personal Beta testers? So surely (don't call me surely) New Vegas would be a streamlined affair, with all the time and work that had gone into the Gamebryo engine. Umm no, Bethesda once again released a completely bug ridden game to the public, many of the bugs being identical to those previously fixed in Fallout 3, with the promise of a comprehensive fix in the future. These practices are unscrupulous and unacceptable. Fallout 3 was given a pass by the media and the public because the game was/is a masterpiece, but Fallout: New Vegas will always be known as the mediocre follow-up to 2008's GOTY.

So when Todd Howard speaks, I listen. When he says new engine, I listen. And when Bethesda releases Skyrim, I will be playing something else, maybe.



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