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Glowbear avatar 10:15 AM on 01.03.2013  (server time)
Hitman Absolution Review: (non-boob centric edition)

Reviewing this game is unusual for me as I've never played any of the other titles in this series and haven't expressed any interest in it at all. I know who Agent 47 is and the trademarks of the game. I also know what this is referencing and find it hilarious.

The copy of the game isn't even mine; I borrowed if of a younger relative to play as I've completed my own games at the moment. But despite the lackluster feelings towards the series, I had to admit I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed it.

The basic plotline without spilling too many beans, is Agent 47 is sent to kill an ex member of the agency, but then things get complicated and next thing you know our baldy murdering anti-hero takes a young lady into his custody and tries to protect her from several forces whilst trying to get to the bottom of the overall conspiracy that's afoot. You'll be taken to a host of locations that all have variety in their design, from a nunnery to a crumbling quarry.

I've read in some other reviews that the plot isn't that fantastic and while it certainly isn't going to rival other story driven games, it isn't that bad a plot at all. The voice acting is executed quite well, the graphics are decent and one section of Part I of the game is very reminiscent of Sleeping Dogs in its feel.

This is the entire design of the level, yes

You have a few options with regards to executing your targets and completing missions. The most satisfying and reward in terms of points, are obviously those done with stealth and scripted interaction. You can rig a car to blow up or poison someone’s food for example. Give the array of challenges to run through and methods of eliminating enemies, I was disappointed in how often, due to contrariness or rushing to complete the game I used my gun. But the game does reward you with a sense of accomplishment and being a true assassin via points/achievements and the scenes that pair with the executions in such a manner that I definitely want to replay the game.

A lot of the pre-launch advertising that accompanied this game focused on the raunchier aspects of the game. Or asspects amirite? The Saints aka the scantily clad gun loving nuns appear quite late on in the game and are disappointingly no different from any enemy you encounter. They're not really hard to take out and have no specialties. This isn't a spoiler to be honest. Especially given how little a role they play when they were emphasised so much. When your main targets are fat gang bosses, you don't mind them not putting up a fight but these ladies are suppose to be badass and yet their demise can be optionally met by a bald man dressed as a scarecrow with some wire.

Even she's confused

The game is also somewhat frustrating and disappointing in the area of being spotted. It occurs at such a flippant rate and they can see you from obscure blind sighted angles. This would make a Purist style of game play quite irritating I can imagine and based on that alone I wouldn't be too excited about my second play through being play on that difficulty and trying my best to limit any gun usage.
It's been mentioned before, but the premise of being easily detected in a disguise by someone in a similar one is completely ridiculous. Surely being in a similar disguise would only increase your evasiveness. But no, I also noticed that if I were to take out a lone guard out of sight, that sometimes an alarm would be raised and even then by changing into their outfit, my disguise would be registered as blown, despite no one being in the area. It's just a glitch of nuisance really, especially if you want to infiltrate a heavily guarded zone and perform true assassin kills.

Still these nuisances are annoying, but not that detrimental to the overall game. I did write about the silliness that is the stripper boob design in the nightclub scene, but thankfully I didn't encounter that too much again, so I'm assuming that the developers were just um...having a laugh?

I can't really judge if the game is the best in the series, but personally I'd have a hard time believing a vast majority of fans who enjoy the previous entries, won't find this one a lot of fun and a steady addition. Given that I am essentially a newbie to the Hitman franchise, I rate this game quite highly, though I'm not sure if I would at this moment in time be psyched enough to play older games.
Still Hitman Absolution is an entertaining, well executed game that has some flaws that induce eye rolling and low mutterings, but it's still worth picking up and playing, possibly several times over.


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