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Glowbear avatar 6:26 AM on 12.03.2012  (server time)
Guilt and Murderbus.

Oh games.

I hate when inanimate objects and activities cause a rush of guilt in you. Don't you? How often have you strolled down the street and then just a wary glance from a traffic light, causes untold degradation to your confidence. I mean here I am spilling my heart out in a blog about gaming and the guilt I feel because of how little of that I've been doing. Worse than guilt of non gaming, is the guilt that goes with gaming for the sake of it.

Now and again if I'm in the company of gamers (whether I know them or not), they'll all be playing some sort of game on various devices, ranging from phones, to Gameboys and Ipads. This will be a consistent activity en route from destination A to B and will occur during dull transport rides or even queuing for a slice of pizza.

What I find amusing is when people play games in a queue to go ... play games. It makes me think "wow now they love gaming, they're gamers", then I think to myself "well hang on now Glowbear Fairchild the 4th, you're a gamer, you love games. Yeah in the past few years you don't really play them on the move as much but come on girl, mhhmmm"

I canít help but wonder sometimes if the majority of people I see in these upright gaming positions are playing games because they genuinely want to, have an addiction or itís purely a means of time killing. See to me, given that I am several centuries old, I canít help but equate this sometimes, not always, merely now and again, to when people are in the company of others and have their earphones in, listening to music. Depending on situation, closeness of friendship and planet alignments, for me itís just not the done thing at all.

For me when youíre with friends, unless thereís some unspoken agreement, the continuation of listening to your music player (yeah I call it that because dammit we donít all have Apple products!) or the implanting of earphones randomly just seems kinda rude. First of all do you need to listen to music that badly for the 10 minutes it takes you and your friend to walk to the shop to pick up a regular lunch supply of sandwich fillers and high volume wine? Will it actually cause your body harm to detract yourself from gizmoís and gadgets to simply walk and talk?
Now for a lot of people theyíll argue that itís not a big deal or even with music blaring in their ears they can hold a conversation with whoever theyíre with. Uh huhÖ

When it comes to other distractions, it gets a little bit trickier. When your eyes are actually needed to focus on something in your hand, rather than whatís in front of you or the people youíre with, many foibles can arise. Walking into objects, not paying attention to your friends or reversing the focus, getting frustrated with the game because you died again and hurling the device at a bus which angers the bus and sends it into an insane flurried detour towards an orphanage. Think before you press start.

Or yíknow press all the buttons while you have a chance I DONíT CARE!!

So in terms of etiquette when it comes to mobile gaming yeah itís fine, yeah thatís the point of being able to game on the move, but I donít think any gaming system was ever meant to encourage actually Ďmovingí whilst playing and I donít quite get why when in the company of others for short bursts where most people would converse, someone decides to get their game on. Weíre going to Tescoís buddy, not a coach tour of Europe.

But back to the actual guilt, yes that lingers still. For me personally I think the reason I donít always get as much gaming done is purely down to location. When Iím at home where my family are, clearly missing me every second because WHO WOULDNíT, I have the comfort of a nice sized TV, set up in a position that means I wonít creak my neck into disability and as not much really happens in Ireland, bar online bovine dating getting a new lease of life, I game quite a lot. When Iím in the UK (which over the past few years is where I am for the majority of the time) yeah I have a TV and my Xbox ect. But there are more distractions. I always favour company and activities of a social nature more so than staying in doing what I always do and can with ease. So even if someone wants a cup of tea in the kitchen, Iím there.

I suppose in reality this dilemma that pursues me internally is only a recent one, but still it makes me feel like Iím letting the gamer in me (called Emilio) down, which is even more guilt based because thatís a big part of me, Emilio is girthy.
I also think that one of the reasons I have dips in gaming is due to just the titles that come out. The last time I went full steam was when Mass Effect 3 came and I played Skyrim quite a lot as well. Iíve completed quite a few games this year, but in some cases I think thereís a difference in beating a game and playing a game. There were consistent replays of various games as well, but I mean I have Dishonoured now and havenít played nearly as much of it as I would have on any other given occasion. Whatís wrong with me?

Can such a thing occur as overdosing on gaming? Is it possible that submerging deeply into a hobby and giving so much of your time to video games can desensitize you to the enjoyment of playing them? In terms of activities we enjoy for the most part Iíd say no. I mean if that were truthful, then I would not want to consume alcohol for a few months. NOT LIKELY IS IT?
Maybe these days more of us have more time on our hands, even with the added necessities of jobs and studies.

The thing is Iíd like to play more games, but obviously I go through big bouts of sheer laziness. Thereís no excuse really, itís simple enough. But we can still love something and spend a lot of time on it, but take a break or admit weíre simply not in the mood right? I love films and watching them, but there can be extended periods of time where Iím not in the mood to watch one, regardless of what type, I simply have no interest. I think in some regards and to a lesser extent the same applies to gaming.

This random occurring law happens in other areas too. Yeah weíve all had a laugh at a meme/funny video or song, but when you keep repeating it in a short amount of time itís not funny anymore and I just want some alone time to read or chill. We all like those moments, I feel. But while there are similarities in the notions such examples imply itís not that big of a deal. Unless youíre someone who loves to correct youíre and your all the time, especially in casual conversations. No one cares, except you and thatís sad and guilt should be firmly applied.

Needless to say I go home for Christmas so obviously Iíll be making up for all time missed gaming, but still while Iím here, with games I often furrow my manly brows and feel bad. I feel like Iím wasting something or losing that gamer titles. HA!

Maybe I should go play some games right now.

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