Flixist Awards 2011: Worst Movie on flixist

WTF is Destructoid? Read this first! Got news? email us

create an account | login

Home Buy & Sell Wii U PS Vita 360 PS3 Wii PC 3DS PSP Reviews Videos Blogs Forums Fight

Genki-JAM's blog

RSS

Contact

About Me

edit

My calling card

My Crappy Artz

AIM: GenkiKatchum100

Gamer Profile

edit

3DS friend code:
Steam: Genki_JAM
Battle:
PSN: GenkiJAM
Mii:
Gamertag: GenkiJAM

Following (19)

edit

Around the community:

Bloggers Wanted: Training

Your complete guide to Destructoid

Ninja Assassin SUPER AWESOME COMIC REVIEW!!
Genki-JAM \| 6:59 PM on 11.27.2009	18 comments

This is a summary of the entire Ninja Assassin movie...

NINJA ASSASSIN!!!!!!

Interesting flashback

Girl: Ninjas EXIST!

Guy: LOL no thay don't!

Ninja: Yeah, we do.

Interesting flashback

Guy: OMG.

Interesting flashback

Guy: NINJAS! NINJAS EVERYWHERE! OH NO! SHOOT THEM ALL AND RUUUUUNNNNNN!!!!!

Interesting flashback

Ninja: *sigh*

THE END.

2/5 stars. I saw what it was trying to do, but it didn't work. Lame story should could have been so much more. Mildly entertaining choreography completely ruined by too-hokey CG blood that GLOWS IN THE DARK WTF. Seriously, this movie is very meh. If you're desperate to see it at all, rent it later (or maybe come to ShiMuNi in a couple weeks?).

Attached photos:

Is this post awesome? Vote it up!

Those who have fapped: Guncannon

Post a comment! You can also post a photo below:

Comment with Facebook

Click connect and comment instantly!

Comment with Dtoid

New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds

16 comments | showing # 1 to 16

JohZho

Shimuni plz!

Daxelman

Blood that glows in the dark?

Sir, you are horribly biased, this should have gotten at least 4 and a half stars.

Genki-JAM

Glows in the dark as in it was so bright red that even in dark sets the blood is unaffected by lighting.

Webnet

It was a fun dumb action movie. I have never seen a kung fu movie with Ninja's that didn't have a silly story with lackluster writing and cliche action movie plot twists. However, Ninja Assasin revamped the formula by doing what was expected, giving me bloody, violent, and excitig action. From the parkour scene in the "secret interpol Ninja holding facility" to the Dojo fight full of dismemberment and blood spurting, the movie was overall good fun... Not mentally stimulating or the best action film of all time but fun, violent, bloody fun.

Genki-JAM

I've seen better fun dumb action movies, though. That's the point. I totally saw what they were trying to accomplish with the movie, but I feel that it just didn't work. For instance, I LOVE Crank and that movie is just stupid fun. I LOVE 2012 and that movie is 90s cheese up the waazoo. Ninja Assassin just didn't capture it the way it could have. Even with its stupid story. Also, when it has the Wachowski Bros. name on it, I usually expect something awesome. Like Speed Racer. That was AWESOME and hokey and whatnot.

Genki-JAM

For the record, though, I think the movie will make a good ShiMuNi movi more than anything.

Also, what do you mean they revamped the formula by doing what was expected? That's the exact OPPOSITE of revamping something. Also, the gory action would have been immensely more enjoyable if they had merely tones down the cartooniness of the way the blood looked. It could have at LEAST blended into the environment more. It just didn't work.

Guncannon

Ninja Assassin? More like Ninja Ass: Ass In...

JohZho

Ninja Assassin's creed 2

Kraid

Needs moar Shinobi IMO.

Xzyliac

I hate it just based on the title alone. Ninja Assassin? I thought ninjas by nature were assassins! It's redundant!

Excel-2011

@Xzyliac:
Not all of them were. The title was chosen for clarification.

Daxelman

Isn't he assassinating the Ninjas?

Gameboi

I got the chance to see this yesterday, and it totally melted my face off. I winced a couple of times at how hardcore the violence was (leave your little ones at home!), but boy oh boy... Ninja Assassin delivered the goods.

Nonstop action. I wasn't looking for the next "Gone With The Wind" when I walked into the theater. I just wanted to be entertained -- and I was. Go see it peeps!

Crunshiii

well at least this looks better than that King of Fighters...

SephirothX

You said you loved 2012... your validity is now void.

Occams electric toothbrush

Meh. Ill just watch it on TBS at 3 am and save my money.

Comment with Facebook

Click connect and comment instantly!

Comment with Dtoid

New? SIGN UP - it takes 5 seconds

Comments policy

Destructoid is an open discussion community. You don't need to "audition" to post a comment - just speak your mind. We respect differing opinions on the site, so have at it. Be smart, funny, insightful, clueless, or cute -- but back it up with substance. Keep your cool, keep it fun. We only ask that you act respectfully and above all: don't be a troll and ruin it for everyone else. Don't bring down gamers or we'll, you know, gently shoot you in the face and stuff you into a flaming mailbox. Each comment is your opportuntity to make this community awesomer. Is that even a word?

Avoiding the banhammer only requires common sense: spamming, trolling, racism, NSFW stuff, and other forms of sucking will not be tolerated. If anyone is griefing please report abuse. Be good. Don't suck!

All editorial content, including blogs, comments, and forums written by our community, are protected by a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing requiring attribution. Destructoid aka ModernMethod is an independently-run company forged by our childhood love of video games and adulthood hatred mainstream video game press.

Living the dream since March 16, 2006