I'm in the middle of a summer creative writing class over at Butte U this summer. Take a look at the first part of my writing and tell me what you guys think and if you like it, I'll post more over the next few weeks.
The Beardstroker Part I
Jim had topped off his gas tank back in Spokane. It was a long way from home. It was probably a good 7 hours before the nearest gas station and he needed to make sure he could make it through the mountains.
Driving through Idaho and through to South Dakota had taken a lot more work than originally anticipated. There was a lot of traffic, snow, and icy conditions to deal with. As Jim proceeded on his journey, he'd spent the last few days just letting himself go. He'd even started growing out a beard.
Jim drove off the highway onto a rest stop. He needed to stretch his legs for a bit. It was certainly odd that there'd be a freak snowstorm in early September, but this was wearing him out. 12 hours of backup through Wyoming and he couldn't handle it anymore.
Pulling off of the highway Jim immediately bailed on the car and proceeded into the mens room. He walked up to the urinal and started to do his business. He stretched, rubbing his chest to try and put some warmth back as the cold started to set in.
As he was finishing up, he stopped to shake and he heard the door open. The cold made him wince slightly. He zipped up and turned to face the new person in the bathroom.
"Name's Ronaldo. You look like you need a friend."
"What? No. I gotta go," replied Jim. Jim tried to brush past Ronaldo, but met resistance. Their eyes briefly met, Jim saw an amazingly tangled and brushy mess of facial hair spilling out from Ronaldo's chin. And then at that moment, Ronaldo allowed Jim to pass.
Jim reached for the door and he heard Ronaldo speak, "Nice beard. Catch ya later..."
Jim stopped, then shook it off. He got back in the car, started the engine and got back on the road.
Looks like poor dear Snaileb got sent on the wrong flight! Now our dear Destructoider is making his snail trails through some places that I've only dreamed about! I don't really know much about Friday Night Fights, but I heard it's FAAAAABULOUUUS!
As per the usual, the sexy chaps across the pond have offered their haloes to you! I know, you're expecting a ghey joke or funny link. GET REAL! Since there's been some new mods that will apparently summon the Nintendo laywers from the depths of hell, the PS3 people will exploit it as much as possible. Have fun, bring back pictures! Did I forget to mention Rock Band? Stay Alive is going to be played alot, and Power-Glove has got you covered.
If you haven't signed up for the Call of Duty 4 tournament, you only have little time left! Hurry and make your way there, and email Destructoidfnf@gmail.com for details.
How does this thing work again...? I need a real man to help me out.
Snaileb - Snaileb (I'm joining a Brawl match sometime, but at 10PM EST it's COD4) Wardrox - Wardrox (Hosting Halo 3) power-glove - POWER GLOVE (Hosting Rock Band)
Burnout Paradise: Any takes? VROOM VROOM.
Condenmed 2 : Hobo Wars: I heard the Multiplayer was bad. Why is it even up here?
Gears of War: Gears will be hosted at 12PM, EST. Just send Snaileb a message! (Yes, still)
Call of Duty 4: P0WER-GLOVE has been an excellent host these past couple of
months, and his continuing contribution is above me. For epic times, find this group of dtoiders. If he doesn't finish with Rock Band in time, see Snaileb!
Rock Band or Guitar Hero III: Does in fact need more Cowbell. I just downloaded
the Classic Rock track too! Bad assery. See Power-glove.
Team Fortress 2: If you prefer the gimped 360 version over the PC, we got you covered.
Halo 3: Teabagging Edition. If you haven't played with Vexed Alex, you're missing out! HEADSHOT!
Bomberman Live: If anyone wants to get a game going, DO IT. Just let us know! :p
The PSTriple crowd have got their plans laid out, and this section is pertaining to what
games they usually play.
Unreal Tournament 3: Yojimbo is now head chancelor of your PS3 activities, and
you can usually find him hosting this.
COD4: Once done with UT3, it's time for some running & gunning.
Burnout Paradise: Not in the mood to shoot people in the face? Then why not use a
Warhawk: Whether on foot, in a jeep, in a tank or in a Warhawk death is but a
Smash Brothers Brawl: Taken quite a while hasn't it? Yes, we've had ALOT of fun messing around with this game. With so many options to take advantage of, you have no excuse!
I suppose the easiest way to join IRC is through java based chatroom, it's old but easy. Make sure you have a bluetooth headset. Just type in :
There is no password to actually access the server, but the Social lounge does require a password, which is "ftw" without quotes of course. Make sure you have a bluetooth headset. If you need a "how to" guide, these lovely Destructicans have your answer. Go
here if you have questions.
Don't have Ventrilo?
Get it at http://ventrilo.com/download.php
Use your 360
I've done this twice and it works every time. Just turn on your 360, join a free XBLA game
(Aegis Wings, Yaris) and voila! Simple, right? Just dont forget that your controller may die.
Team Fortress 2: Custom Maps TF2 server information
We thank you for your continued support of FNF and hope to see you there tonight.
Join us for a game of AMMO at 11PM ET. The game is a free download at http://agentmoo.com/AMMO, and the game will be running on the server Megamoo. Thanks to all those who voted for the new character in my game; this MOOnday Jim Sterling will be playable in my game.
Okay, here's what happened. Me and a few bois from the coal mine were over at Mary's for Cosmo Night. Cosmo Night is basically, one of the photographers from Tiger Beat comes out from his ranch and takes pics of us in glam poses and there's $3 ucallits and $2 cosmos all night long. Anyway, I was on my 6th-7th (?) Cosmo when I was approached by this really femmy looking guy. He said his name was Leslie.
Mary's on Sinatra Night
Anyway, we start talking about life and expectations. I told Leslie that I'm looking to settle down and find a partner that I can spend time with and grow old with and he tells me the same.
We head back to my place and talk some more, drink some more... start making out...
And next thing I know, we had sex. It was really awkward. But I was so drunk I didn't really notice anything different.
It wasn't until the next morning that I realized that Leslie was a girl.
I ran out of my place screaming. She was gone by the time I got home.
She sent me a message on myspace asking me what was wrong, I froze up and deleted my entire OS X installation to get rid of the message from her.
I didn't communicate with her for a month or two...
Yesterday night I was at Mary's again for "End of Hibernation" night and Leslie was there with someone else.
Our local chapter
But I noticed that something was different about Leslie. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, at the time, but I think I figured it out.
I think she's pregnant. I mean, I thought she was a man, and I know that two men having sex with each other, they can't get pregnant, but I thought she was a man at the time. Oh god... What do I do?
I'm a hypocrite and a flip flopper. But I think Hillary's going to address the issues that concern me most.
Like where to buy fabulous outfits and decent hair care products on a budget while in the midst of a recession.
And unlike other candidates, she's promised she won't pull out until the job's done. Good for her. If I wanted that mess on my hands by her pulling out too early, I'll ask for it. Don't just assume that I would want it that way.
In any case, I present to you my convincing argument for voting for Hillary in 2008.
So, she's basically going to win this thing.
And Larry, go screw yourself. I got your voice mail last night and you can laugh at me all you want but it still doesn't change the fact that you think sparkling white wine is champagne.
What a lame-o.
I found this. I think she's a hoot.
I only wish I could be as fabulous as her. I mean, she has a REAL phone in her car. Not some fancy pants bluetooth headset phone. A REAL PHONE.
I take serious issue with trusting the presidency of the United States to certain parties. It's not a decision I take lightly. The powers that be in Washington set forth to putting out presidential candidates WAY before the general election. So, over the last 18 months or so, I've been looking over who I'm planning on voting for come November. I was still on the fence about this issue for the last month or so, but a recent discovery today has led me to decide to endorse John McCain for President.
I have other valid reasons for backing McCain as well.
I found out that my last BF, Lawrence, was a Log Cabin Republican.
Based upon that information, I've decided that I am aligning myself with the ideals that this represents, if only so I can get Lawrence to continue returning my phone calls.
LARRY! CALL ME BACK BABY!
I'm sorry I lied to you about being a virgin. I should've told you the truth.
Normally, you'd think seeing a guy like me do this on the first date would impress most gay men, but apparently not.
Larry, please forgive me. Call me back. Please. I'm sorry.