Most everyone who has CoD4 knows about the ridiculous "Mile High Club" achievement, where you have to get through the airplane epilogue on veteran in less than a minute.

I spent the two days this week trying to get this insanely hard (for me) achievement. It took about 60 runs for me to get it. After I beat it I went on youtube to see how other folks have done it. This is where the shaming starts.

p3rvypri3st (who gets huge props for an awesome name... because I'm Catholic and it's funny) has a video up in which he blows through the level in 35.5 seconds. I think to myself, "Wow self. That put us to fucking shame. It took us almost the whole minute."

Then I check out this guy's other videos. Cries of "No Fucking Way" followed the viewing of this video, where he beats his previous best with 28.6 seconds:


It only gets more amazing from there. Just to prove that I had no clue how far people could take this, he does the following face meltingly awesome runs:

Using ONLY flashbangs and the knife:


Using ONLY FLASHBANGS (Are you fucking kidding me? I call shenanigans!):


And finally, using JUST the pistol with NO FLASHBANGS! (WHAAAAAAAT!?!?!?):


This has to have been one of the coolest displays of awesomeness I've seen in gaming. Knowing how hard it was to beat with all weapons and no self imposed limitations makes this all the more impressive to me. I shudder to think how many runs this guy had to make to get these vids. This was just too cool not to share.

There has been a lot of love around here for Zack and Wiki: Quest for Barbaros' Treasure, but a few of us (namely me) had not yet picked it up, probably because we're cheapskates.

I just ordered it today, and the price is good enough that even if you're on food stamps, you should buy it. Over at Family Video, Zack and Wiki is running at a modest $27.64. Use the coupon code NEWMEM5F if this is your first time shopping at FV to get $5 off, and use the $0.99 shipping option, and you pay a total of $23.63 for this amazing game. FV doesn't charge tax unless you live in NJ, but if you live in NJ, you've got way more problems than paying $2 in tax.

So get off your lazy ass and buy this game. (Better late than never, right guys?)

Oh, and Applebees sucks, except for their Asian Crispy Chicken Salad. I could drink that dressing.

This video shows what one industrious Call of Duty 4 PC player, Zak1234000, was able to do with just a week or so of time with IW's mod tools. Replace the air strike with a GoW Hammer of Dawn-style Ion Cannon, and you have much fapping.

It's things like this that make me wish that MS would unclench their virtual ass cheeks a bit on their proprietary DLC lockdown. Sorry 360 owners, but we'll never see this on our beloved space heater. It's almost enough to make me pick up a copy of CoD4 for the PC. Almost, but not quite, since I still have to find a way to pay for Condemned 2.

The official Condemned 2: Bloodshot website is now live. Check it out here.

If this game is anywhere near as good a the first Condemned, I will go ahead and forgive Sega for all of the Sonic dribble over the last ten years. Exploding babies and environmental kills = happy Fuzzy.

The site has your standard sections; Game Info, Media, Characters, Attacks, Downloads, and the always important Pre-Order Option. Characters, Attacks, and Downloads are "coming soon". Why would you make an official site live without having the content set? Maybe this is just one of those "delayed rollout to increase anticipation" scenarios.

Appealing to all of your cheaper natures, the lowest price that I have found for this game is at Family Video for $57.68. Has anyone found a lower price anywhere else?

The sequel to Monolith's criminally underrated 360 launch title Condemned: Criminal Origins has been given an official release date. Condemned 2: Bloodshot will be released on March 11th in the US, and might be released in Europe on March 14th (with Europe, you never know).

In a press release, Sega revealed a bit more information about Bloodshot's multiplayer offerings. There will be four modes available, Deathmatch, Team Deathmatch, Crime Scene, and Bum Rush. Bum Rush is a survival gametype where one team tries to stay alive for a predetermined amount of time, while Crime Scene has multiple rounds in which one team tries to collect and analyze evidence, while the other team tries to hide and protect the evidence (using murder I would assume).

Other than the terrible subtitle (Bloodshot? Really?) I am squealing with glee right now. This game doesn't even need multiplayer to get my monies, as I was a hardcore fan of the original (I still play it). So what do you think dtoiders? Anyone else getting a chubby right now?

All I've heard about since Crysis was announced was that it is the system killer. That you have to have a monster rig to run the bastard. I'm here to tell you, that it isn't true (at least unless you want it to look better than your vision after a seventh Irish Car Bomb).

To test this monster, I downloaded the single player demo (took forever) and installed it (took longer than forever).

Here are the official minimum system specs for Crysis:

CPU: Intel Pentium 4 2.8 GHz (3.2 GHz for Vista), Intel Core 2.0 GHz (2.2 GHz for Vista), AMD Athlon 2800+ (3200+ for Vista) or better
RAM: 1GB (1.5GB on Windows Vista)
Video Card: NVIDIA GeForce 6800 GT, ATI Radeon 9800 Pro (Radeon X800 Pro for Vista) or better
VRAM: 256MB of Graphics Memory
Storage: 12GB
Sound Card: DirectX 9.0c Compatible
ODD: DVD-ROM
OS: Microsoft Windows XP or Vista
DirectX: DX9.0c or DX10

And here are the systems specs for my laptop, which is a Toshiba Satellite A215:

CPU: AMD Turion 64 X2 Mobile Technology TL-58 1.9 Ghz
RAM: 2.4GB DDR2 PC25300 667 SDRAM
Video Card: ATI Radeon X1200
VRAM: I have no clue.
Storage: 160GB HD
Sound Card: I'm sure it may be possibly Direct x 9.0c Compatible
ODD: DVD-ROM
OS: Windows Vista Home Premium
DirectX: DX10 (I guess, since it upgraded my DX when it installed)


I was shocked when it actually ran. It had to be set at the minimum settings, and with no frills or shaders, but I'll be damned if it didn't run. It ran at a fairly smooth framerate, I'd say somewhere in the range of 20-30fps, and was reasonably playable, except for the fact that I forgot my external mouse today, and laptop touchpads were not made for FPSs.

In conclusion, Crysis on my computer looks like the best shooter that was never published on the N64.