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About
Gamer, Musician, Artist.



A gamer has gotta game, other then that, this is where I spend most of my time:
http://funkzillabot.tumblr.com/
http://www.gamerztech.com

Gamer sites:
http://raptr.com/funkzillabot
http://kotaku.com/profile/jamBot/
http://www.giantbomb.com/profile/jambot/

Others sites:
http://www.twitter.com/funkzillaBOT
http://www.flickr.com/photos/crlake/
http://www.youtube.com/crlake
http://www.viddler.com/funkzillabot
http://www.twitpic.com/funkzilabot


The Ground Rules. 0_0

Do NOT expect “Loyalty” to one game console over another. Let's just get that out of the way right now, because I don’t want to hear it. I own all three current generation consoles, plus some older systems and handhelds. The only loyalty I have is to myself, family and my very close friends. That’s how it will always be. However, I do have gaming loyalties to certain franchises. That I will own up too. And my viewpoints about them are pretty solid. (example: Zelda, Final Fantasy, Mass Effect, etc.)

Do NOT ask me anything stupid, like “What’s the point of this?” What is the point of anything? What is the point of breathing in and out? This and any other similar statements translate to “I’m bored, and I just feel like picking a fight, instead of doing something worth while for myself, so I’m going to shit on someone else.” Well, save that up for your mom.

Do NOT flame bait. You can if you want to, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I will answer you.

Do NOT assume. For the obvious reason of not looking like a stupid fool. If you are confused about a statement, my way of writing, or just want to know a view point of mine THEN ASK ME! It’s as simple as that, no need to make things more complicated. We’re only talking about video game and not world peace.

Do NOT re-write or email me some LONG WINDED explanation about how I got “it” wrong and your version is "right". Seriously, don't! Again, I don’t want to hear it. That’s why I’m now writing “stories” and not “articles”, I SUCK at writing articles, and I KNOW that. Writing personal stories from a first perpective, is what I do best. If some of the basic information that I've written, is wrong I wouldn’t be that surprised. I do my best to check the fact before hand, now, but I'm only human and may not catch everything. I may view the things in a sort of “Camille-o-Vision", which makes the story or situation seem 10 timer then it actually was. Which is is why I’m good at writing stories.

Do NOT remind me about capitalization. I know, that's the way I write. So suck it up and don't whine about it. If you really want to complain about something so trivial then start your own blog page, it's free.

I am a reasonable person, so if you’re cool with me, then I’ll be cool with you. If you just trolled over to be a dick.... like I stated above, save that up for your mom. We’re here to talk about a subject we all love, so let’s try to have some class.
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Again, oh so many [Spoiler Warnings].... I finished the game (hooray and yay for me), but just like Titus from FF10, “this is my story”, and it's one that is very strange indeed. The ending that I received left me with a bit of a mystery. So I’m thinking that my game play variables may have had something to do with the results I got.



To start with;
- I was using the Xbox360.
- I can tell you that I didn't sign-up with EA's online Cerberus (whatever), at all.
- I didn't download the free armor that you get when I pre-ordered the game.
So to start with, none of those things were present, as I played through ME2. I do believe there was a patch update, but that was automatically installed when I turned the Xbox on to play the second day (Feb 28th, 2010).

Why didn't I download.... X, Y, Z? Well, I wasn't trying to avoid it purposely. It just sort of happened that way. Like everything in my life, I 'did' mean to get around to it, but I just tore through the game and the next thing I knew, it was over. So, what where my choices? Who did I sleep with? And what happened at the end of my story? Drum roll please....



- I played Shepard as a man.
- I imported him over from Mass Effect 1.
- Jack Shepard.
- Soldier Class.
- Face and body type, I kept all the same. (Why would I changes this? He's hot.)
- Level 49.

Also: In the last game:
- I went for Liara, the Asari.
- I sent Ashley on the suicide mission.
- I didn't rescue the Council. (I will explain this later.)
- I didn't shot Rex.



Game starts. Now as I explained in part 1, Shepard starts off pretty down graded at the beginning of this game, and that status doesn't really get much better. So, winning and saving the galaxy doesn't automatically bring you back to some glorious hero statues. No. Because of the location of the enemy ship and the cover-up by the new HUMAN run Citadel Council nobody will know whether you'll lived or died. However, they’d know instantly if you failed.

For a love interest.... it sure the hell wasn't Miranda. No f*king way, and if there was a renegade option to smack her in her lying mouth I would have done it. (*read part 3 for my views on this subject)

I seriously considered pursuing Tali, because she's pretty cool. But having to make-out in space suits was just a little too weird for me. Next on the list was Jacob, but there is no "gay" option in this game as a man. So I went with Jack, who really isn't as bad as all that. What happened to her was pretty f*ked up, and you have to do what you have to do to survive. Yes, she has a big mouth, quite violent, and angry (kindred spirit really), but she's NOT a liar (unlike Miranda). Jack is putting it all out there, so what you see is what you get. If you dig a little deeper you can see that she's still a scared kid who wants to put all that mess behind her, so you gotta respect that at least.



Ironically, both Miranda and Jack are very similar in what they both went through in order to have such strong biotic powers. The only difference is that one came from money and the other was an orphan, or torn away from her mother at a very young age. Both women were not able to live normal lives, and they both were mentally and physically abused. Making a kid go though that much plastic surgery is kinda f*ked-up, which is why Miranda may look like a plastic "Barbie Doll". But out of the two of them, Jack is actually less fucked up then Miranda. As strange as that sounds.

(Oh yeah... and I DID sleep with Kelly, the pretty red haired girl. You know, the flirty secretary chick? I was being so bad. I just wanted to flirt with her, and I wanted to see "Commander Hottie" flirt with her. I didn't think she'd go for it. Oops. Jack didn't seem to care about that. To Jack; someone who is being nice to her and not an asshole, is consider foreplay in Jack's world. She seemed to be cool with it.)



Anyway, continuing. I had gotten everyone’s loyalty, except Miranda, which at that point I did not care what happened to her. We had gotten through the Omega 4 Relay, to attack the collector ship. After a long, exciting cut scene. Jacob volunteered to unlock the doors on the collector ship. I wanted to send Miranda. That way if something happened, I could prune the dead weight. But of course there was no option to send her. So I sent Jacob, because he volunteered. He got the job done, but Jacob was killed during fight as we tried to escape. Shot through the head, he died instantly. I was upset about that. I liked him. Better then the girls really.

Once we found the Normandy's missing crew members I made sure to send Tali back to the ship, despite Miranda's cold hearted suggestion that we should just leave the injured crew members to die, or worse, let them fend for themselves. Wow. Just, wow honey *rolls-eyes*. Anyway, I sent Tali with them for 2 reasons; I didn't want Tali to get hurt, and I knew she'd get the crew back safely to the ship.



I took with me for the final battle the Asari Justcar, because she was the most powerful Biotic user, and Grunt, because he's a Krogen, and straight up crazy. The people I left under Garrus's Leadership were;
- Jack
- The Salarian Doctor
- The Assassin
- Legion the Geth robot
- Miranda.

We pretty much cleaned house. When it came time to make a decision about whether or not to blow-up this technology, once it became clear what the Illusive Man was actually after, I told him to get stuffed. "I'm blowing this place up, because NO ONE should have this technology.... especially not YOU".

Everything happened so fast, the bomb was going off and we still had to get out of there. I had ordered everyone back to the ship. "Get back on board the Normandy, and the 3 of us will catch up behind you. Move out!" As we come running around the bend from the teams last know position I see that they're all gone. I also turn to see Miranda lying on the ground dead. "Um... OK." Well, I'm not exactly crying a river, but how exactly did she end up dead? "Did one of YOU's shoot her? Was she getting on somebody else’s nerves, besides mine?" Well... can sort out who shot Miranda once we're back on the ship and out of danger.

With the rest of the team back on board, we take off. Enemy ship destroyed. Galaxy saved once again. After an ugly screaming, ‘fuck you’, conversation with the Illusive Man, mostly me telling him that, "I'm not your lapdog anymore so piss off, and I'm stealing your ship.... sucks to be you.... haha!"

So at the end of this, I am left with all the Cerberus people dead. On the run from a very Mad Illusive Man, who I'm sure is not going to just sit back and watch me joy ride around the galaxy in HIS stolen ship. He was paying the bills so I have NO WAY of paying the crew, paying for fuel or food. And I'm sure he's not too happy about Miranda being dead, and no one owning up to who actually shot her.



My first conclusion was, Jack shot Miranda. I mean, they were such good friends and all. (sarcasm) Calling her 'bitch' every 5 minutes was just Jack's loving term of endearment. Next, I thought maybe it was ‘The Assassin’. Maybe Miranda said something that pissed everyone off, as she often does. The Assassin is so quick, he could have easily killed her without anyone being aware of it. Nobody liked her. Jacob was the only one who did. With Jacob gone, the rest of them had no reason to stop the Assassin, or said a word about it, and they haven't.

I talked to every single person, twice, and they all acted like we never went on the mission. It could have been the Illusive Man, but why would he do that? That was his girl, she was with him since age of 15. Without Miranda, The Illusive Man would have no way of keeping tabs on me. His snitch would be gone.

So... who shot Miranda? It's a mystery. A small one, since no one will own up to it.
Photo Photo Photo








To start with, unbelievable [Spoiler Warnings] up the butt. I wrote this in response to one of the videos I made in order to show my friends what this game was about, and why I was going on about it. That's when I realized that this was turning into a novel. So, I decided to make a Note/BlogPost and get it all out of my system.



First, let me say that this is a damn good game. I mean, from the second the game started up, they threw you into this bizarre situation. They completely changed control system, with no warning or warm-up. A fire fight with an unknown alien race, ship on fire, crew jumping into escape pods, and Shepard DEAD. I really had NO idea what the fuck was going?

The very next scene was a dude waking-up on an operating table, and then shooting my way out of a hospital. With only this woman’s (Miranda) word to go on about what's happening. That is, until you run into Jacob, who is the only one with any convictions at all.

Problem 1. For some reason, BioWare decided that their already complicated Xbox control scheme from the last game wasn't complicated enough and changed it without ANY warning at all.

Problem 2. Once you've come to realize that Shepard no longer has that cushy title of “Specter” anymore. So instead of him swanking around the galaxy like Hero king on high, and sleeping with chicks. NOW you start the game off as just some bum.

This makes everything and everyones reaction to you much different, and the game much harder. I guess I really didn’t realize that Shepard was getting special treatment from the the words, "I'm a Specter". Because now, people treat you like, "Oh... yeah... that was you? I though you were dead? So, anyway what do you want?", or my favorite, "Oh... it's YOU human, what do YOU and your 'kind' need now that you haven't already taken?" Damn.

I actually had an attitude about these changes in the "story" for about 3 days. Why? Well, because now -- he's not the “hero” any more. Now he's just some guy. And 'I' don't play a freaking 96 hour RPG to play as "SOME GUY". I play video games to be a person who's larger then life, someone who's noble, trustworthy, dependable, acts with honor. Who swoops in and saves the day. Someone who's........ JESUS. Not just "some guy". Ahhhh....! I'm already a "some guy" in real life, and there's nothing special about that. I'm just some bum, like all the other bums on the planet Earth, and where's the fun in that?


Anyway, the clown that you work for, and you DO work for him, is an untrustworthy prick, with a frightening history behind his company’s name. So, no matter how hard you try to go BACK to the Citadel and get yourself re-instated in the military and/or as "Specter". They said, NO WAY! They were "polite" about it of course, but... they didn't want to touch me with a 10 foot pole while I was 'involved' with Cerberus.

They didn't even want me in the room. I no longer had access to the pristine and upper crust sections of the Citadel. I was only allowed access to my Human Embassy Representative, and that's it! Then I was quickly escorted back down to the slummy sections of the Citadel, the only place where they would allow a 'Cerberus' Ship to dock; along with the other pirates, mercenaries, and shady business men. (What... A... Fall...!)

And the insults didn’t end there. Oh, no. My old ship mates that survived the accident, and my former commanding officer wouldn't speak to me anymore --- and called me a "TRAITOR"! (The hero of the mother-fucking galaxy, branded as a Traitor.)


After awhile, it really just sounded stupid and a little pathetic, to repeatedly say that "I don't work for Cerberus", when I CLEARLY do. I'm taking money from them, and they are paying me after every mission. They paid for a brand new ship to be built. They paid to bring you back from the DEAD. So the whole ----- you owe us ---- is pretty damn clear. And let’s not forget that I have my own personal bitch... I mean snitch on board ship. Tracking and reporting back every freaking thing that I do to the scariest 'mofo' ever, who STILL has yet to make his motive clear on what he "really wants" from you. Yeah... Shepard is hardly in a position of "being a hero", more like the position of "being the lap dog".
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Orson Scott Card didn't write "Shadow Complex". Peter David (who worked for Marvel Comics), did. However, Orson Scott Card is most diffenitly taking the credit. The game story is based around Card's Book called "Empire". But all the events from the game are taking place BEFORE Card's story even begins. Orson Scott Card has added NOTHING towards the development of this game.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shadow_Complex

However, that doesn't mean the Orson Scott Card isn't receiving a royalty check, because he probably is. "Chair Games", used his Main Character's name and the background plot of American Nazi or whatevers trying to start a New Civil War with in the United States. The part about the 2 hikers getting lost and accidently stumbling into this mess, the day of the Ameri-Nazi's were going to attack -- that was Star Trek writer Peter David. And that's the story that they actually used for the game.

As for Orson Scott Card's personal view points. Which he, himself, should be ashamed of but I know he's not. We can't control what he thinks. But what we can control, is what he does. And he has NO RIGHT mouthing off and telling others how they should live. As long as a person is NOT committing crimes, or causes bodily harm to another. It really is NON OF YOUR BUSINESS.

Unless of course -- it really IS your business... and that's part of the problem. Mmmmm... Maybe? Most people, who have problem with Gays or Gay Rights, don't ever carry things this far, and toward such an extreme view. So then I have to so and wonder, that he maybe "Protesting a little TOO much", and may in fact be hiding or covering up some what. Mmmmm.... Maybe? Well, I seen Orson Scott Card's Behind the scenes interview, and all I have to say is, "You sir may need a flash light to find your way to the front of the closet door, because the only one who is fooled by your behavior is YOU".

It says in the United States Constitution, that we ALL have the RIGHT to "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness". No where in there does it say, "you have the right to be act like complete douche-bag, and purposely hold back others, because YOU DON'T agree with them". If you are a United States Citizen, then you have the RIGHT to live as you chose. That is YOUR RIGHT as a Law abiding TAX PAYER. It really is as simple as that.