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About
Hello there, my name is Alpha.
Now. Many mysterious things can happen when you encounter an elephant. It may decide to take you on a trip to another planet, which is dangerous because we don't know what kind of food they eat on other planets. If you were allergic to it all you'd probably die very quickly. Of course, you could try to eat the inhabitants of that planet but they'd probably try to kill you for that so maybe that isn't a good idea either.

A good way to get rid of unwanted slices of bread is to toast them. I like to call this "Toasted Bread" or "Toast" for short. Many people toast bread so it's not my invention but it's not something which gets talked about often enough and so I thought I'd write a book on it.
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PSN ID:Flanx17
Steam ID:NoxLycanth
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Hello my tempting teacups of tenacity.
I've come back from the dark corner of my bedroom to bring you the opportunity to talk with the community about things! What have you been doing lately? What have you been playing? Did that girl next door finally send you those nudes? Don't keep it to yourself, discuss!

Because my life is very uninteresting I don't have much to share but I'll see what I can do.

On the PC I am....
Finishing Resident Evil 6! I've been playing this game for a good 20-something hours now which is suprising, I didn't think I was gonna get that much time out of it. It can be a frustrating little fur tail sometimes but overall its quite fun. I've only got Ada booty  Wong's campaign to finish now. OH AND HELENAS SISTER.



Can we take a moment to speak on how disturbingly sexy this zombie is?
I mean you get the pleasure of fapping to fighting this TWICE. 
Too bad the bloody game doesn't let you pause.

On the PS3...
I'm playing BlazBlue again. Not really because I want to but more because I haven't played any acfade fighter in a while and the hype for the new Guilty Gear is RISING. I cant wait for it, I think I'm gonna stick to good ol' Chipp although Sin Kiske does look rather fun, so does the odd gal in the long dress. I never stick with one character for long so I'll probably jump around until I find the main.

Here's a new video if you haven't seen it yet

In the realm of the real world...

I started going to the gym. I got a friend coming along with me. The guy lost a heapload of weight over the last year. He got really tired of being lethargic and heavy and so he decided to do something about it. Now he's real happy with his body and I thought I needed some of that in my life. So I'm going along too. Maybe I'll be as sexy as Andy Dixon in a few years time.
Related image:

That's it from me, what's everyone else been doing?

(oh and here's something funny http://www.gofundme.com/hksruc)
^ Yes that is me. This is a joke campaign im running, I am going on holiday but I don't think I look too attractive in a hat tbh.

 

 









Anyone who uploads a picture of them eating slices of cucumber will recieve a slice of birthday cake.

Unlike Destructoid competitions, no matter where you are in the world I will send you cake.

I'll be 20 years old, does that make me too old to marry Andy Dixon? I heard he likes them young.

Remember to PM your address so I knew where to send the cake...otherwise the postman will eat it and he's already kinda fat.

Did you know this website is about video games?

I've never had a girlfriend.

What makes pineapple taste so damn good?

I started going to the gym a week and a half a go. Squatting 40kg. 5 sets of 5. Soon I'll big enough to build a house for me and Andy Dixon to raise our children.

Here's a random image link

http://i.imgur.com/IzdiTC6.jpg









Earlier today, Destructoid person-thingy Darren Nakamura stated that he had not yet eaten and would probably eat a bowl of Rice Chex.
I have proof, an cropped screencap of my screen at the time, 13:00.

At the same time, I was speaking upon the dreadful fact that the USA plans to use the Hulu satellite to destroy all monsters whales living in the area around Australia. I though that these two comments apearing within such a short time frame was suspicious and so I did some researching... The results are disgusting, so prepare yourselves.

1. Darren Nakamura lives in Arizona.
Arizona is the name of a drink.
The green tea flavour has blue packaging.
The sea is blue.
Whales live in the sea.
[Evidence towards Darren killing the whales pt.1]

2. Darren Nakamura's Linked In states that he..
Is a Agricultural Chemist II at Arizona Department of Agriculture.
Chemists make chemicals.
Chemicals leak into the sea due to incorrect disposal methods.
There's a 91.305% chance that Darren has disposed something in his life, at least once.
Chemicals in the sea have killed Aquatic life before.
Whales are aquatic life.
[Evidence towards Darren killing the whales pt.2]

3. Darren Nakamura's Facebook profile pic is a cartoon of him holding a dog.



Look at the state of this dog.
The dog has two different colour eyes.
One of the eyes are blue.
The sea is blue.
The dog is an animal.
Whales are animals.
[Evidence towards Darren killing the whales pt.3]

4. I searched "Darren Whales" into google and I got...
A picture of Darren underwater, finding the right spot to aim the satelites laser beams.


5. I've never heard of Rice Chex.
Let's assume this is some sort of whale killing code. We break "Rice Chex" into letters and assign a number to each of these letters, the number being their place in the alpha bet. If we add up the sum of "Rice Chex" we get 74. Australia has 9 letters in it. Dividing 74 by 9 gives us 8.2 if rounded.

Season 4, Episode 6 of Grey's Anatomy is rated 8.2 on IMDb.
Grey's Anotomy?
Name of a whale found near Australia...?

Mesoplodon grayi — Gray's Beaked Whale.

 

DARREN NAKAMURA IS PLANNING TO KILL THE AUSTRALIAN WHALES WITH THE HULU SATELITE, CONFIRMED.

 

 

 

 

 

Photo








Hello my beautiful little dragon-rabbit hybrids.
I've come to ask a question...
What have you all been doing lately? What have you been playing? What have you been playing with? Did you get consent to cut that apple?
If you've clicked on the link and you are viewing this blog, you have to leave a reply or I'll have a party with all your favourite foods but only invite your mother.

I shall start this magnificent conversation with words. Big ones.

On the PC I've been playing Evil Residents 6. It's a game about a load of guys who go out and party one night but then drink too much of "Occams Electric Special Brew". They then begin to walk around moaning, looking for their car keys and it's your job to shoot their heads off so you can help them find their parking space.
I can't believe Capcom made this game, it's great. You smoke weed (or as they call it, green herbs *wink wink*) and f*ck bitches. Maybe. I haven't got to that chapter yet.

My only problem is that it's not scary. The bit that made me jump the most so far is when a fridge turned on in the first of the Justin Beiber missions.
Oh yeah, Justin is in this game. But they call him Leon? Must be a translation error.
This game really pushes my gaming limits, there are all sorts of handicaps put in place to make it harder! Some examples are not being able to walk in a straight line and entering a sexual relationship with the floor everytime you get shot. Exciting!

Once I finish this I'm going to play Evil Residents Revelate Sean. I might do a "Let's Play", I have recording software and a sexy voice. Ready the lube.

On my Vita I've been playing
Ninja Guy Then Simga, Plus....
But it never says what is being added...plus what? The suspense, it's great! 

This game is about a young man who accidentally walks into an old mans house while following love letters posted on the walls of the local playground. Obviously it's a trap, and the old man's grandsons multiply their bodies making a mini army. This mini army come after you for no apparent reason and they HURT. It's a good thing there's a lot of liquid meth around to heal you up. I swear, these kids just don't stop and when you try to hit them back  they just block! When you beat them they pee themselves (it's censored though, the game calls it "essence" in an attempt reduce the embarrasment) and by absorbing the pee you can charge your special moves faster. Weird Fetish. 

Once you finally get to the old man, you tickle his beard but then are disturbed mid action when a purple haird girl comes in an explains that the disgrace she has brought upon her family has made someone steal some sort of black dragon sword (innuendos galore)! So you put on some pyjamas, fight a man on a horse and take a flight on a Zepplin! That's how far I've gotten so far anyway.

SO, what have you been doing?

EXTRA: HERE'S A RANDOM PHOTOSHOP.

 

 

 

 









Dudes, look at this mini gate!

Its playing Soul Sacrifice Delta on my Vita. A gate with a good taste in games?

GAMERGATE CONFIRMED.

Finally, I understand what everyone is talking about.

(failblog, here I come!)

Photo Photo







FlanxLycanth
6:51 AM on 09.10.2014

ITS A THING GODDAMNIT ITS A THING ITS HERE LOOK AT IT, IT EXISTS I DONT CARE IT HASN'T BEEN POSTED ON THE SITE YET AND I NEED TO EXPRESS MY LEVELS OF FEELS LOOK AT IT, ITS SO BLOODY MAJESTIC ITS LIKE SOMETHING YOU WOULD SEE ON THE SIDE OF AN ICE CREAM CONTAINER OR A PET THAT THE QUEEN WOULD HAVE I NEED THIS GAME IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW ITS ALMOST LIKE OXYGEN EXCEPT LESS INVISIBLE.

 

I BROKE THE BLOG EDITOR.