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C-Blog Fan Fiction Chapter 9: Class - Destructoid




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I've been working on developing video games for a few years now. I put up a blog on here to share what I hope will be sensible and interesting articles about game design. The "Fame Design" name came to me when I thought, "I want to be famous for only one thing: video games".

At the moment I'm developing new games in Flash. So I expect to share experiences in being an indie game developer. I often find myself wondering if I should be working in Flash, HTML5, XNA, or the iPhone/iPad SDK. Time will tell.
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I'm particularly proud of this episode. I don't have internet right now because I just moved. I had to make sure I collected the right info at work and take it home with me to get this done. Special thanks to Kahla for the art!

James, Beyamor, and Elsa reached the outskirts of Greenvale. Upon arriving the truck they were using sputtered to a halt. The gas needle was on empty so they looked around Greenvale for some fuel that they could use. They checked restaurants and old gas stations for resources but they had all been looted. There were people here now looting and claiming ownership of property.

“We’ll have to go on foot from now on.” James said.

“Are we going anywhere in particular?” Beyamor asked. “I know you have a plan for meeting up with Andy Dixon’s daughter, but do you have a plan to find the cannibalistic murderer?”

“Now that you mention it, I do have somewhat of a plan.” James said confidently. “Leave everything to me.”

“Hold on boys.” Elsa said. “I have some things to do while I’m here. I’m going to go get some food and post some more messages. I’ll meet you here later. By then, you guys better have a plan.”

James pulled out a coin from his pocket and held it up between his fingers. One side showed heads, and one showed tails. The coin looked ancient and was made of solid gold. Beyamor thought it seemed likely that James got it from Hugh.

“This… will decide our path.” James said slowly. “One side is heads which will take us to Bright Falls. The other side takes us west to Ravenholm. No one really goes to Ravenholm anymore, but it’s the perfect place to hide a criminal. On the other hand, the smartest killers can hide in plain sight. So maybe Bright Falls isn’t so bad of a choice. Either way, the coin decides.”

“Fine, I’ll be back later.” Elsa said walking away.

“Flip it.” Beyamor said.

James flicked his thumb, shooting the coin into the air. A dull ping sound came from the coin and lasted a moment as it flew upwards. Beyamor had never heard the strange dull sound of a gold coin before. It was a flatter and heavier sound than silver, nickel, or copper. When it hit the ground it rolled around for a few seconds and came to a stop.

“Heads.” James said.

“Bright Falls it is.” Beyamor’s eyes lit on fire. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”

“It works every time. Don’t worry so much.” James smiled.

“You know,” Beyamor took a deep breath. “When we find this guy I’m going to kill him. You know that right?”

“That’s your deal.” James said, disappointed. “But you should just think about playing it safe. Don’t jump the gun. This guy is most likely more than you could handle yourself. Don’t split the party, if you know what I mean.”

“I can handle him, trust me.” Beyamor looked away to the clouds.

“Can’t say I didn’t warn you.” James raised an eyebrow at Beyamor.

Both of them walked around a bit more finding some food to eat and a place to rest. They found some black berries on a fence near a residential area. The berries were perfectly ripe so they picked a bunch of them and carried them in their shirts over to where the abandoned markets were. There were people around, and someone was causing a scene.

A man in the middle of a crowd of people spun around and stomped on the soil. He yelled at the villagers, pointing his fists at people in some sort of bizarre attack. Some people ran away holding their asses while some stayed and tried to tackle him, to no avail.

Again the man spun around and slammed his foot on the ground. He flung his hands forwards in some sort of quasi kung-fu type motion. James expected a fireball. But, all that was seen were people dropping and grabbing their asses, moaning in pain. A few people around him squirmed on the ground yelling, “No!” And they repeated this again and again as if they wanted to reverse the process.

“We should help them.” James’s berries dropped.

“Sure, uh… What do we do?” Beyamor said.

“Just fucking tackle him I guess!” James said starting to run.

“Ahhhh!!!” Beyamor let out a war cry.

They both got the attention of the strange man and Beyamor was attacked first. The man jumped and turned his body around in mid-air and landed with a thud.

"With my rings powered, you become deflowered!" The man said activating his power.

Beyamor felt something shoot up into his bum. The pain was instant, mentally and physically. He dropped, shocked that something seemed to have entered his poop shoot. “Things are supposed to come out of there.” Beyamor thought. “Not go in.” Something the size of a baseball bat came to mind. James backed up a little and looked at Beyamor, wondering just what was happening.

“It’s telekinetic rape!” Beyamor clenched. “Aaaghh!”

James turned back to the telekinetic rapist and could only think of how he was next. His eyes dilated big and shiny and cartoony, praying that nothing would go near his bum. The man struck another pose, did some fake kung-fu move, and, like a spinning bottle, faced James.



“I… AM… DIMMUJED!!!” He screamed.

From out of the shadows another man jumped in to help. James only saw the blur out of his peripheral vision. Two objects hurtled towards Dimmujed at break neck speed. James waited for a possible insertion and closed his eyes.



The objects hit Dimmujed in the face and then quickly the commotion stopped. He now sported a top hat and a mustache. Dimmujed fumbled around, startled and confused. He found himself wanting to climb a tree. He climbed towards a faint sound he was hearing. He thought it might be a cat meowing.

He found the source of the noise, and sure enough it was a baby kitten. Never before had Dimmujed felt the urge to save a kitten that was stuck in a tree. He climbed down with the kitten and walked towards everyone, petting the animal.

“I just saved this cat!” Dimmujed said, disoriented. “I’m going to turn over a new leaf! Now, I will only use my powers for good! NOW, I will only rape bad people!”

Dimmujed put the kitten on the ground softly and walked away with his chin held high.



“Who are you?” James said, looking towards the man with a bag full of top hats and moustaches. He also had a top hat and there was a long moustache awkwardly taped over his own full goatee.

“My name is Kraid.” He said. “Fear not. I have changed his alignment. He will not be hurting innocent people anymore.”

“Changed… His alignment?” James said.

“My ass!” Beyamor said.

“Yes,” Kraid said plainly. “He is no longer evil.”

“Like, he’s now good?” James asked.

“No, my friend…” Kraid said. “He is now classy.”

James stared in awe of Kraid. A light seemed to shine down on him as he stood there watching Dimmujed leave.

“Why are you here, if I may ask?” Kraid said.

“We’re looking for someone. A killer.” James said.

“Let me guess. You are looking for the man who was responsible for the Greenvale massacre.” Kraid hypothesized. “I volunteer to help.”

“We could use it.” James said.

“Consider me part of your team.” Kraid said.

“What the hell happened to you guys?” Elsa said, looking at all of the victimized people.
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