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FAILCAST avatar 4:13 PM on 03.20.2008  (server time)
Failcast Episode 5 Beta: The Ark of Ceark

Some things are changing with Failcast. Little things, like a toddler growing his teeth in. And then chewing up your furniture, so you have to smack the dumbass to teach him a lesson. But don't try to smack us. We will fuck you up.

Then Child Services gets called in, and instead of the kid getting protected by the State, you end up pleading with them to take the kid away for your sake. No one believes that a kid could be the abusive half of a relationship, and while they make a half-hearted report, you know nothing is going to get resolved. So you have to live every day in fear, wondering when the next attack will come. Before you know it, you've chained yourself to the shed in the backyard, a circle of red paint framing your naked body, waiting for Gardamax, Lord of Madness, to impale you with a crimson spear forged from salmon.

Don't fuck with us.

Also, don't fuck with Ceark, because he's pretty cool too, and our guest for not only this preview of episode 5, but episode 5 itself. In this installment, we discuss art, cblog recaps, how awesome Ceark is, and his amazing Destructoid comic. Not surprisingly, we praise him for doing God's work.

As always, if you want to contribute to Failcast in some form, our email is [email protected], so drop us a line if you want to be on the show, contribute an audio clip, or link us to something totally fail/win. We're not picky.

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