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Hey robots, I'm Excremento, but you cool and old skool Dtoiders know that already, this is merely for the N00BS. I've been a videogamer for as long as I can remember. I have well over 27 years of video game experience that I rely on daily, and a near encyclopedic memory of gaming starting with the Commodore 64 and ending with whatever is the current hotness.

I've got my own blog at MediaWhoreNetwork that I try to write on when I'm not too busy...and just recently have decided to come back to do a few Community Blogs here on Dtoid now that most failbloggers don't exist anymore. I'm still here fellas (and ladies) updating as often as I can for all of your enjoyment.

Any of you out there who wish to chat it up with ol Ex can do so at:

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A Cast of Thousands - Gregg The Grim Reaper
Excremento | 8:20 PM on 07.08.2008 12 comments




Death, the one inevitability that we all must face. The one absolute to each of our lives, that is unless you're a character in a video game, then death is as avoidable as most common STDs (Protip: look for open sores to avoid Herpes), or steaming piles of dog poo on the sidewalk.

Fortunately, the brilliant minds at Rare decided to put a nice spin on death by giving him a face, name, and perfectly suited attitude for his job. I'm talking about Gregg...Gregg The Grim Reaper...ya know from Conker's Bad Fur Day. For the first good couple of hours playing Conker I had managed to not die. But as the game progressed, the difficulty started to get more...well...difficult, and death was inevitable. Once I finally bit the dust while fighting the HayBot at the bottom of the barn, I was treated to a nice cutscene where you hear a menacing voice calling out to your character. "Conker, Conker, Conker, Yes you boy, You're Dead, You are dead. Dead as a Dodo. Deader than a.." it is then you see one of my favorite video game characters of all time, Gregg the Grim Reaper.



He is one of the few characters in the whole world of Conker the Squirrel that has no issue giving Conker a taste of his own medicine in the form of being a smarmy cunt. In the short introduction between the two characters you get to know more about what its like to die as a video game squirrel than you'd probably care to know.

Now he may not seem like much of a character, but the few times that he does pop up in the game are more than enough to get a feel for the character, especially his disdain for his job that resonates so closely to my own opinion of work. Let's not forget his hate of cats. He bloody hates cats. For the longest time, I as well didn't have any love for the normal house cat.

Not only is Gregg's appearance something that I could never have anticipated, he's also damn funny to boot. I mean, just look at him, he's a diminutive Grim Reaper with a gold tooth! Every single time that i was treated to a scene featuring Gregg, I knew that I was in for a treat.

It might seem strange to be able to identify so easily with a auxiliary character that only has about 5-6 minutes of actual time in the game, but for that moment of time in my life I was Gregg The Grim Reaper. Not that I enjoyed killing people or even slaying cats, but the disdain that he has for his job and all of the smart-assed people he has to deal on a daily basis made him an endearing character that I hope gets his own title one of these days.

The Great Mighty Poo, King Ooga Booga, The Weasels, and the Bee King & Queen were great, but nowhere close to being as funny as Gregg was in the brief times he was featured in the game. Below, I was lucky enough to find a collection of all of his appearances in the game. It's sad to think that he's only in the game for a little over 4 minutes. Oh well, he's still one of my favorite assholes in recent gaming history.



I really don't know if it is the British accents or what, but to this day Conker's Bad Fur Day remains one of my favorite games because of the excellent dialog that each character is given. There is such a variety of individual characters represented in the game, it's hard to believe that the voice acting cast was so small.

I'm not sure how many people picked up Conker's Bad Fur Day on the Nintendo 64 or the remade/censored version that came out on the Xbox as Conker: Live & Reloaded, but I honestly think that it is incumbent on you as a gamer to spend a good couple of nights running through the crazy, platforming, adult oriented world that Rare so skillfully crafted.

Maybe Rare will see the error of their ways in the future and actually decide to take a chance on us adult gamers again...yeah right, fat chance, we all know that we're doomed for more sequels to Viva Pinata and a version of Banjo Kazooie that doesn't seem quite true to the original. Oh well, at least I can game happy because I own both versions and even take the time to play them all the way through every once in a while, its seriously that good of a game.



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10 comments | showing # 1 to 10
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nebones's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2008 20:42
nebones
I enjoyed reading that.
randombullseye's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2008 20:44
randombullseye
My favorite scene with him is when he's killing the catfish. I remember that because its right before the first zombie scene. He gives you the shotgun if I recall correctly. Oh I see its in that video. Classic. Nothing more, nothing less.

For me, my favorite Conker character has to be the unwilling hero himself. He's got the best lines and is the most surprising. Remember hearing about the twelve tales of Conker? Yet another platformer with an animal hero. But then someone shifted gears and we got a hilarious M-rated parody of platformer and most other games. They parodied the matrix before it became the thing to do. And that ending is the most brilliant ending ever!

Such an unappreciated game Conkers Bad Fur Day was. One of only a handful of great N64 games. If you somehow missed this game, find it and play it. The 360 version looks pretty and has the difficulty toned down, but the original N64 cart has a certain charm to its aesthetic.
Simmons 2pt0's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2008 21:03
Simmons 2pt0
Need a true Conker sequel imo.
Aaron Mxy Yost's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2008 21:19
Aaron Mxy Yost
Excellent! I need to replay this game, I have the n64 cart around somewhere...
F Whipple's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2008 22:06
F Whipple
Steaming piles of dog poo are not that avoidable. Whether it's a nice looking girl across the street who catches my fancy or some random beast of a dog popping out to make your life hell.
nintendoll's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2008 22:07
nintendoll
Death is a popular theme this month, haha.

I never personally played it but I watched my friend play through the 64 version. Never saw Gregg though.
lucashoal's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2008 23:08
lucashoal
I dno, he seems kinda poncy.

(Conker reference is awesome)

I just tried playing it again the other day...and I hate how my tv isnt bright enough for everything to show D:
Conrad Zimmerman's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/09/2008 01:16
Conrad Zimmerman
Conker is one of the four or five games I have for my N64 and the reason I bought one. Gregg was one of my most favorite bits.
king3vbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/09/2008 10:35
king3vbo
Anything Conker is win. Conker is one of my favorite games for my N64
Cowzilla3's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/09/2008 11:29
Cowzilla3
I love Conker so much. Wish they'd make a good sequel.
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