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It's my birthday!
Eschatos | 5:50 PM on 02.14.2009 14 comments


It's been a while. About a year I'd say. Now it's been almost two years since I joined Dtoid. So much awesome shit has happened since then. I've made tons of cool friends and almost met Mr. Destructoid.(damn you work) Thanks to all you terrible people at Destructoid for making it an awesome one. Here's to another year of awesome vidjagaming.


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Mercenaries 2 Lulz
Eschatos | 11:06 PM on 12.20.2008 11 comments


Mercenaries 2 had more than its share of problems, but at least they know how to poke fun at themselves.


Bigger

For some context this mission appears fairly early on as part of the UP missions. You have to escort a UP executive as he destroys a bunch of documents. If you kill him yourself he says this line.

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A cast of thousands: Gordon Freeman
Eschatos | 12:40 PM on 07.11.2008 6 comments


This might seem a little bit unorthodox. Some would say "How is Gordon Freeman an awesome character? He doesn't even talk!" To this I will simply reply with a "Fuck you and get out of my house".


Our lord and saviour

Gordon Freeman is me. He shares my joy of smashing crates, my hatred of headcrabs, and my desire to show Alyx my crowbar. I don't mean to say that Half Life 2 is my biography. What I do mean is that Gordon is a blank slate. There is a reason Gordon doesn't talk, and it's not because Valve is too cheap to hire a good voice actor. Every time I play Half Life I superimpose myself onto Gordon. He may not say a word, but I do.


Evidence he does exist

Because of Gordon Freeman, Half Life 2 is the most immersive game I have ever played. I still remember the first time I played through it. I rushed home from school with my new copy and played until 2 am. I'm surprised I didn't bring a crowbar to school the next day.

Gordon Freeman may not have the best personality. Hell, he doesn't have any personality, but he's mine. And that's what matters.


Person pictured may or may not be me.

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G-Man can Dance!
Eschatos | 5:27 PM on 05.05.2008 8 comments


A lovely little video showing the dangers of mixing motion-capture technology and Half Life.

I advise you to not try this in game.




Spotted on kotaku

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Not my Turning Point gaming rig
Eschatos | 8:15 PM on 04.05.2008 6 comments


Behold! The machine of machines! My computer! It's a nice gaming machine, but it's starting to fall behind the curve. A brand new machine would make me very happy. I might even donate the old one to someone else who needs a good gaming platform.



View the guitar of awesomeness, the big daddy with the bigger sword, and the ultimate Dtoid wallpaper.



A closeup, for those inclined. Wires, phone, CDs.

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More Wonderful Ads!
Eschatos | 9:33 PM on 03.23.2008 14 comments


You guys know how much I looooooooove interesting ads, so of course I couldn't resist posting this:



To be honest, I really preferred the ads for dead hookers.

At least this time I got around to copying the link:

http://rm.yieldmanager.com/click,tQcAANeZAAAf3QoAosADAAAAAAAAAAwAAgABFwIABgOPs
wAADQ4AABqoBQAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIoT50cAAAAA,,http%3A%2F%2Fwww.
destructoid.com%2Felephant%2Ftemplates%2F728x90.phtml%3Fpage_id%3Dhomepage,

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about me

Games I'm playing now:

Earthbound
Gears of War
Kingdom of Loathing
Dwarf Fortress
Titan Quest
Team Fortress 2
Morrowind
Arcanum
GTA: Vice City

Favorite Video Game Characters:

Boyd (Psychonauts)
Sheogorath (Oblivion: The Shivering Isles)
Sander Cohen (Bioshock)




Proud owner of the word Lepengedaric™.

Anyone who trades lulz for candy deserves neither lulz nor candy. -- Me


And,according to Whiteboy/EternalDeathSlayer:

Destructoids Official Bringer of Comment Lulz


 Mii friend code:
matt57488@aol.com

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