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About me:



I am El Dango, the pretzel-fueled bossfighter of the North. I post jokes, gif, songs and silly Photoshopped images on the front page, although sometimes I do want to have a bit of discussion, usually about game design, which interests me a lot.

Here's a fave game list, everyone else have them (alphabetical order):

Ape Escape
Batman: Arkham City
Beyond Good & Evil
Doom
Octodad: Dadliest Catch
Oddworld: Abe's Exoddus
Pacman Championship Edition DX
QWOP
Rayman Legends
Shadow of the Colossus
Sonic 2
Tekken 3
Tetris
Wario Land 2

(NOTE: I'm only putting one game per franchise now, for variety's sake. Some choices that I really truly love have therefore been removed. Doesn't mean that I love them any less.)

I also strongly enjoy games and series like Zelda, Burnout, Mario, Sly Cooper, Ratchet & Clank, InFamous, Jak & Daxter, GTA, Saints Row, Counter Strike, Splinter Cell, Tomb Raider, Worms, Roller Coaster Tycoon and Metal Gearrr, as well as tons of indie games like Limbo, Mutant Mudds and Guacamelee. I don't have these at the absolute top though, great as they might be. If I did, this list would be crazy long, and I prefer to keep it short and personal.

Platformers are my favourite genre, followed by third-person action adventures. I do enjoy a wide variety of genres though, with the only ones I tend to dislike being RPGs and, to some extend, RTSs (go ahead and pronounce that last one). I'm usually open to action games of any kind.

( ͡ಠ ͜ʖ ͡ಠ)

A visual representation of other things I enjoy:

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El Dango
8:49 AM on 03.19.2015

Last year, around the time that I started my current life as a young, unemployed hobo, I decided to use more of my spare time writing blogs on Destructoid. It seemed like an ideal way to spend some of the massive amounts of free time I was starting to gain, between applying for any open position I could find. I wanted to write about something fun, something gaming related that I really enjoyed, and in the end, I decided to write about awesome boss fights, through a blog titled Boss Fight Appreciation Zone (BFAZ). The first of the series was, I believe, the first of my blogs that was actually getting somewhat popular, and it inspired me to keep going, while making me want to make each iteration look better than the last. Five blogs were written in the series, with one being a "bonus round". It gained some steam, then lost some again, but people seemed to really enjoy the series overall. It's what finally made me feel like I was "inside" the community, like I was a real contributor, who could make a genuine impression on people on the other side of the planet.

Saying that, it might seem weird to some folks that I haven't any of these in 2015. There are a couple of reasons for that, and I'd like to ask and answer a couple of questions related to all of this.

Is BFAZ dead!?

Not entirely, no. In fact, I'm currently working on one, and has been so for a while. It's another bonus round, one mainly featuring a certain egg-shaped super villain who I'm sure you're all familiar with. However, after this one, I may call it quits. See, these blogs take a long time to make. Not only do I have to make gifs for each boss, but tons of other little images as well, not to mention that it all has to fit together and, to be honest, for one blog, the effort isn't entirely worth it. Blogs die, and are only rarely brought up again, so spending all that time making them pretty and detailed seems a bit silly. I still want to make good looking blogs, but the way BFAZ has evolved is very demanding and overly ambitious, and changing it back to basics would just feel cheap, to me at least. 

Aside from that, it was a very community driven series, and the last blog didn't gather that much feedback, so continuing with a Round 5 would be difficult. There's always a risk to be run with stuff like that, and I got way too confident with it. People probably got a bit exhausted by it, and understandably lost interest.

Will there be another series to replace it?

Maybe, I'd say a 40% chance. Doing a series is a lot of work compared to unrelated blogs, and the only idea I currently have for one is something I'd call 'The Naughty Bits', which would be a complete rip-off of Ben Davis' Experience Points series, and probably way worse too. So yeah, while it's certainly possible, it's not on my priority list.

Will the 'Into the Desert' blog be finished?

Fuck no, it's dead!

Sorry to the handful of people who voted for it, I appreciate your enthusiasm a bunch, but that blog was turning into a boring load of shit very quickly. It's not that I can't write an entire blog about deserts in video games, it's that I can't possibly write a good one. You know, one that won't put people to sleep. 

Seriously, here's the gist of it: Deserts in real life are kinda boring, so some video games make them look interesting and give you means of transportation in order to make them more fun to traverse, while still trying to make them feel vast and open ended. That's pretty much it. Can you imagine that being stretched into an entire blog? God damn, that would be painful to read through.

Here's a blogging tip: Don't tell people about your blog ideas! I have a ton of unfinished blogs lying around, all of them coming from me changing my mind and/or losing interest. Losing interest especially is a red flag, and ignoring this flag will make for an extemely dull blog. You can't make people care if you don't care yourself.

What's the point of this blog, then?

A little bit of closure, mostly, just in case some of you out there have been wondering. That, and I wanted an excuse to show you the stupid photoshop I've made. It would never be relevant anywhere, so here you go.

That's all folks! Treat yourselves well, and be sure to have a nice day. :)

Bye!









 

Hello Destructoid, and welcome to a very special blog!

Writing about interactive entertainment is a lot of fun, and it's something that I intend to do more in the future. However, sometimes you need to take liberties with what you're given if you really want to express yourself in a way that truly matters, and nothings in this world matters more than food. Because, you know, we need that in order to live. Yet, while the consumption of food used to be nothing but an act of survival, we, as a species, have come as far as to turn it into an event, an activity, and even an art form!

I've always had a lot of appreciation for good food, but recently, I feel like it's been stronger than ever. Ironically, I've often been called a picky eater, and yeah, I suppose it's true, but when I do like a dish, I really like it. It actually fits in rather well with my taste in other things, such as video games, or any other media.

What I'm writing here is essentially a top seven of my favourite dishes ever, although it's only really the last one that fits into any sort of 'order' (and you might already know what that one is). The number doesn't mean anything, it just happens to be the number of favourite dishes I could come up with. No reason to make a blog like this all that long.

 

Speaking of long...

This is probably one of the first things I learned how to make, and the first thing that made me wanna learn how to cook. It took a while for me to actually get there, but this was a brilliant beginning. I've always been down for some spaghetti, and I always manage to empty my plate, no matter how big it is. Like, seriously, I've managed to eat some pretty grotesquely huge portions of spaghetti in the past, which you'd think would be impossible considering what a small dude I am. Where does it all go?

Of course, the main attraction here is the sauce. I like mine a little spicy, and I usually add a bit of extra oregano to it. Sometimes I even add some fresh tomatoes myself. It's also really important to me that the meat:sauce ratio is maintained, so that it won't get too messy and/or flavourless. Balance is important!

Parmesan cheese is also a must for me, though I've come to understand that this is something many people would rather avoid, which I've never understood. Granted, I usually add plenty of it (don't judge me, it goes bad quickly), which would understandably turn some folks off, but even a little bit makes such a huge, positive difference. But, okay, I have my own toppings and spices that I dislike, which would probably make others think I'm weird too, so it's okay. We all have our little things that make us want to chicken out.

 

Speaking of chicken...

Fucknuggets!

Sorry, I mean fuck nuggets! Don't get me wrong, I like chicken nuggets, but if they think they will ever rule the Fried Chicken Kingdom, they better prepared to get deported ASAP! Tenders tend the throne here, bitch!

Holy cock, what a surreal scenario! All that was just a way for me to say that chicken tenders are awesome and delicious, and my second (SPOILERS) favourite way of being served chicken in any fashion. This is despite the fact that I like chicken in pretty much every way.

Fried chicken tenders are basically the perfect mix of good meat and oily crunchyness, two things that are far too rarely seen together. In my experience, most fried food is junk, but I've never had tenders that disappointed. Then again, I've never had them that often, so there are probably plenty of places that mess them up, despite how easy it is to fry chicken. Seriously, I've tried it myself a couple of times, and it really doesn't take much to at least make it decent.

Then again, there's always been something fishy about the way some of the, uh... "less admirable" eating establishments serve their fried chicken. Pretty sure some of it is even worse for you than you might think.

 

Speaking of fishy...

My grandfather was a fisherman, and what an impact he left on me. He's been dead for almost 13 years now, but I'll never forget the stories he would tell and the pictures he would show me of all the fish he and his crew would manage to catch. He was a great guy, and probably part of the reason why I love fish fillets as much as I do.

Cook it on a pan and serve it to me with a slice of lemon, as well as some fries or bread to the side, and I'll be a happy man. Unlike everything else on here, however, I personally prefer having this for lunch rather than dinner. It's just 'light' enough, you know? It never makes me too full, but it gets the job done, and that's what I consider the best kind of lunch.

I also like different sorts of fish, but cod has always been my go-to fish. That's normal, right? Everyone has a go-to fish, right? Make sure to write about your go-to fish in the comments below, I wanna know what it is. You all have one, don't try to hide it, I'm not crazy! You're crazy! Tell me everything about your go-to fish! Don't wrap the truth in the blanket of comfort, it's time for it to come to the surface! Like a fucking fish!

 

Speaking of wraps...

This is where things start to get spicy. There isn't a lot food in this world more satisfying to eat than a succesfully wrapped tortilla full of hot, cheesy, meaty, tounge-roasting goodness. It's one of life's most simple pleasures.

FUN FACT: I couldn't find any images of a tortilla wrap that looked even remotely like the ones I make. Way too many veggies, not enough cheese, meat and hot chili peppers, AKA the three main ingredients in a Dango Wrap™. I just came up with that name on the fly, what do you think?

"Do you wish vengeance upon your own tongue, and do you happen to utterly despise your asshole!? Well, we got just the treat for you! Introducing the Dango Wrap™, a cheesy, spicy mess that will burn you from both sides! Go grab one today!"

Sometimes I do add a bit of cucumber though, so my recipe is a bit mixed. Variety is the spice of life, even when actual spice is hugely involved.

 

Speaking of mixed...

Here's a little something that will wok your socks off!

This is almost as much an experience as it is a tasty meal. I've only had this at one place (just down the street from where I live, which opened a couple of years ago), but I've eaten it a bunch of times, and it's always a total joy!

See, the way it works is that you get to pick from a large variety of meats, vegetables, noodles and other stuff, then take your plate to le chef, who then gets to work his magic in front of you (while you get to pick the sauce that you want). Remember to seperate the meat from everything else, though, as it needs to be cooked first, before the other stuff is added. Don't make le chef sad. Be responsible.

Oh, but even after the show is over, you get a seriously tasty meal. An unstoppable hurricane of flavour is the only proper way I can describe it, especially if you really vary your ingredients. They got squid rings at my place, and they come fully recommended. Squid is so weirdly delicious. It's chewy, but entirely worth it, and adding a few squid rings really make a difference with this dish, being a perfect complement to the more ordinary beef/pork/chicken combo.

A plate of mixed goodness like this is always guaranteed to leave me satisfied with everything in life.

 

Speaking of goodness...

Boyoboyoboy! It was only a matter of time before this timeless classic made its debut.

How do I even begin? You've had this, you know what the big deal is. We all do! It's a steak, it's not rocket science! It's not some kind of uniquely aquired taste. It's the world's most accessible piece of meat.

Of course, there is only one proper way to cook it, which is on a grill! Sure, other ways may lead to acceptable results, but only in case of weather related emergency situations (if the sun isn't shining). If you can grill it, that's how you gotta do it! Always look out for them while doing so, too. You don't leave a steak on the grill, you watch over it like a concerned mother, making sure your little kid doesn't get sunburnt. Overcooking a steak is nothing less than a tragedy, and no one should ever do that! I know that some people say they prefer their steaks well done, but some people also claim that the pyramids were built by aliens, so I think the conclusion we can make here is that some people can be a bit silly at times, and that we probably shouldn't listen to them.

There are several different types of cuts when it comes to steaks, and I would probably get a lot more street cred with the cooks if I picked and stuck with one, but I honestly like the variety. T-bones, for example, are pretty fantastic, but they are also a lot more trouble to prepare and cook, and I'm glad it's not all we got.

 

Speaking of grilling and Summer and all that is good in this world...

Yes, it's time for the thing that you could already see in that little 'things I like' collage I've made.

Whoever came up with this is the biggest genius the world has ever seen! Holy fuckleberry, I love me some ribs! Mmmmh mmmh mhh! Everything from the consistency, to the flavour, to the slightly rough nature of the actual eating process, is absolutely perfect to me. Gotta get your fingers dirty, people! That's how nature made you! 

I could always eat ribs. It doesn't matter how sick or tired I am, there's nothing in this world that can stop me from accepting such a heavenly meal. I must have this every Summer, otherwise I would stop functioning. As with the previous entry, this belongs entirely on a grill. There just has to be a certain amount of smoke in there in order for it to be just perfect! Furthermore, the sauce should be applied in a way that makes it be absorbed by the meat. Don't drown it in sauce, that's just overkill. Some restaurants do that, and it sucks! Make it a thin but substantial layer that adds flavour to the meat, without ever overdoing it. I've even made my own sauce a couple of times, often to surprisingly good results. The beautiful thing about barbecue sauce is that there are so many ways to make it, and you can find tons of recipes online. One day, I'm planning on coming up with my own unique one. I'll probably make it slightly spicy.

But please, don't give me any of that "McRib" crap. Everyone who's ever called that thing a living legend should be ashamed of themselves. McDonald's is not quality, it's junk, and you should get your rib fix somewhere else. Ribs being treated as some sort of junk food is a gigantic insult to everything I stand for, and it's a trend that I very much wish to see the end of.

 

Speaking of end...









Merry Christmas everyone, or at least you'd think it was, seeing as this is a super late Secret Santa related blog that I probably could've easily written ages ago. It's a task that's been hanging over my head for a while now, and though I admittedly haven't finished the game in question, I do think it's about time that I at least shared my impressions so far.

Cannibal Steven is a clever dude. Instead of assuming that we'd actually have it be a Secret Santa arrangement and buying something early on (which was my approach), he waited until his victim giftee was revealed before he made his choice, allowing him to pick something much more personal. Noting my open enjoyment of the Tomb Raider games, he decided to introduce me to a series of rather similar games in form of the Legacy of Kain Collection.

Getting a sizable collection of games rather than one is obviously pretty exciting, and I am very grateful. That said, figuring out where to start turned out to be really difficult. I knew that blasting through all of them was gonna be too much for me, so I decided to pick one. My first choice was Blood Omen 2: Legacy of Kain, but that one crashed pretty early on, so I decided to go with something else. My second choice, the one that I finally stuck with, was Legacy of Kain: Defiance.

What made my choice of starting point so hard is the fact that this franchise is not exactly straight forward when it comes to the way each title is named. I'd actually argue that it gives Rambo a run for its money in this regard. As you can see, the actual position of the Legacy of Kain title varies from game to game, and the fact that there seems to be two mini-series doesn't help at all. I still have no idea what the core difference between Blood Omen and Soul Reaver is, but I did eventually learn that Defiance is apparently the latests game in the franchise (aside from some MMO thing), so there's plenty for me to be confused about.

There's this channel on YouTube that tries to explain video game lore in a minute. I checked out their Legacy of Kain video, hoping to get a better understanding of what was going on in the story, but it only vaguely helped. In the comments, people were talking about all the lore that had been left out of the video, which didn't even have time to touch on one of the main playable characters. Regardless, what I did figure out through the game is that the legendary Tony Jay once voiced a giant tentacle monster, which is actually pretty fucking awesome! The Elder God, I believe it was called, and damn if that isn't a title fitting of Mr. Jay himself. 10/10 for the casting, Kane.

When it comes to the gameplay, I've found it pretty enjoyable so far. First thing I did in the game was trying to get used to the controls, and I had to change the controls around a whole lot before that would ever have a chance of happening. There are a lot of functions in this game, and it's not always clear what all of them do, so it's definitely been taking some experimentation.

Defiance has you switching between two characters, Kain and Raziel, who both have their own sets of abilities. Kain is a vampire, but I'm not sure what Raziel is. 'Zombie' seems to be the most fitting term. You use these two to kick some ass, explore some environment and solve a couple puzzles along the way. It's definitely Tomb Raider-esque, if notably more combat heavy, and with a lot less climbing involved.

One really cool feature, to me, would be the automatic camera angles. They may not always be that helpful during combat, but I still like them. Full camera control has understandably become a standard over the years, but I wish it was more divisive. I also enjoy stuff like ICO and the early Metal Gear Solids for their perspective, because it makes the games feel more simple and streamlined, which can definitely be a positive. That, and it can be a helpful tool for showing off the environment in the best way possible. Games trying to be 'cinematic' doesn't usually appeal that much to me, but if they do it like that, I certainly can't complain.

The combat in this game is unusual, but I mean that in a good way. You have your regular sword attacks, but then you also have telekinesis, which sends enemies flying. I don't think you ever have to do that, but not doing it would be madness, because it makes everything way more fun. Flinging an enemy into a wall never stops being satisfying, and the fact that you can even do it from a distance is pretty fantastic. Add the finishing moves, where Kain/Raziel sucks out an enemy's blood/soul, and you get a combat system that does a decent job carrying a large portion of the game. It's not like Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, where combat is clumsily inserted everywhere, despite not having that much to offer. Here, it serves as a nice break from the exploration and platforming, rather than getting in the way of it.

Of course, I also have to mention the environments, which was one of the biggest pleasant surprises to me. They look really, really good. Obviously, there some areas that look very pixelated, but it's more about the art direction than it is the graphical power itself. You get a lot of tunnels and tight spaces that you have to run through, but once it opens up, it shows off some huge, detailed, beautiful areas, suddenly giving you a much better idea of where you are and where you're going. I like that because it makes every area feel very grounded. You know you're in a big place, but you don't really feel it unless you spend a lot of time there, getting to explore every little dirty hole you come across.

Overall, I guess my biggest problem is that a lot of things, even simple functions, are just a bit too tricky to get the hang of. At one point I spent a lot of time with Kain in a tiny room, having nowhere else to go, as I had to light some torches in a particular order using a new power that was pretty difficult to aim. I also still find myself having trouble remembering all about Raziel's realm shifting, and I frequently forget which sword of his that I have to use. As much as I appreciate that the game wants to challenge me, I do wish it would let me get the hang of its mechanics a little easier.

During this piece, I've made a couple of comparisons to other games, but one that sticks with me as being more fitting than any other is Darksiders. Pretty much everything from the character designs, to the mythology, to the silly little glide that you can do, it all pretty much fits. More specifically, I'd say that it is to Tomb Raider what Darksiders is to Zelda. I think that sums it up pretty decently.

Before I end this, I'd like to pont out how weird Raziel looks. He might be a hideous zombie-like creature, but I gotta say, he's got some really good hair! I can't help but imagine him in his apartment, spending hours in front of the mirror each morning before going "Bleh, doesn't get better than this, time to slay some demons and vampire hunters and whatever else I come across".

Do I recommend this game, then? Well, yeah, for the same reason I'd recommend Darksiders. It's just a fun third person action game that may not be that original, but which certainly manages to scratch that particular itch. I'm definitely going to play it to completion, and chances are I'll probably check the other games out as well.

BALANCE EMBLEM!

 









HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOU MOTHER FU

*ahem*

Happy 9th Anniversary, Destructoid!

While I haven't even been around for half as much time, it certainly feels like an online home to me. Lots of good times have been had, both in the front page comments and in the blogs, and it's exciting to me that we're getting close to the big 10! One whole decade of also cocks!

To celebrate, I'm gonna be doing OpiumHertz's "challenge" of writing about the nine Dtoid members who have left the biggest impression on me. There are tons of competition here, and many worthy members have been left out. You absolutely should not be sad if you're not on the list, because there are very few members on here that I've ever had a problem with, and chances are I still think you're the absolute tits!

Note that a lot of these "awards" are earned due to people showing themselves as much more than abstract avatars wrapped in internet memes and culture (which is still a bit too rare these days), and as real life people with varying tastes and complex personalities. Be yourself, is what I'm trying to say. :)

 

Let's start off with the top dawg of anything community related on this site, Dr. Dixon himself! His enthusiasm is indestructible, and his efforts have made it so that the blogging space has become my favourite aspect of Destructoid overall. Even when I have nothing to write, I've become so attached to the Cblogs that I check them pretty much every day. 

Andy's posts are ones that I always look forward to, regardless of whether it's a silly dick joke or the announcement of a cool new event or feature. I just straight up really dig the guy, and I'm glad he's in the position that he's in. Really, how could you not like a guy who gives you a thumbs up with every post?

Mr. Andy Dixon is the hero Destructoid deserves, and the one it needs, so it's all pretty neat.

Even though this guy pre-ripped off my title, I can't deny he's left an impression. For one, I adore his username. It's very fitting for a gaming site, but in an unusually clever way, one that certainly beats the cliché of [game character]+[age/random number] that people still use. Aside from that, his God Hand blog also inspired me to step up my image game when it comes to blogging, seeing as that one was made entirely with images, allowing for a lot of creative freedom. He also hosts the 'You can't say that' competitions, which, aside from being a lot of fun, also let me know that auto-playing Soundcloud songs is a thing you can put into your blog, as you have probably found out by now.

Aside from all that stuff, though, Luck is a swell guy. Very friendly, positive and funny, and his latest blog is all the evidence you need for this.

I was Luckrequired's Secret Santa last year, and that's one chimney I couldn't be happier to climb down!

Captain Kittenbeard belongs on everyone's list, honestly. While a lot of thing initially attracted me to this site back in late 2011, Occams is what made me stay. That's right, if any of you don't like me, you can blame this guy for making me not want to leave. Here's why:

What I first saw in Occams was a person with a weird username saying weird things. That's all well and good, and not the first time I've encountered this, but what I eventually started to notice was his popularity. His uniqueness didn't turn people off, but rather, it attracted them to him. That's unusual, and it made me happy to see, because that's a sign of a good community. Occams' comments are almost always original, unpredictable and hilarious, and even the more basic ones are very positively loaded. I have this image of him being like a wise man, with his calm and eccentric behavior being almost inspirational. He's certainly one of the nicest and wittiest people I've encountered online.

Also he has like a million bands, which is awesome!

I originally got into reading about video games through stuff like top 10s, comparison pieces and other kinds of fun little articles and videos. Sadly, it seems like gaming media has drifted a little bit away from that kind of thing, which I don't understand. It's fun, and it often makes for a surprisingly good read/watch, so I think it has plenty of reason to exist. Thankfully, Ben Davis (formerly known as bbain) has done plenty to bring it back, and I very much appreciate it. He has done a lot of top 10 lists already, and is currently doing a series called Experience Points, in which he simply talks about his favourite parts of certain games.

Experience Points is, in my honest opinion, one of the best things to come to the front page in a long time. It's the kind of content that every gaming site benefits from, and Dtoid certainly does. Ben has always had a very positive influence on this site, and ever since he became part of the staff, it's only gotten better.

I feel like I don't even have to mention how friendly he is, either. It's kind of been a recurring theme on this list.

The first big impression Luna left on me was her Crash Bandicoot 3 blog (which also makes my music choice somewhat relevant). It was a really entertaining read, and had a lot of images too, if not as many as Luck's blog on the same subject. That said, she is just as much of an inspiration when it comes to the visual aspect of my own blogs, as she puts a lot of care and effort into hers, to great results. I've come to really appreciate blogs and articles that have a distinct look to them, as they are usually the ones that I remember the most.

Since then, Luna went on to arrange the Secret Santa event last year, which was awesome, even if it wasn't so secret. We were also supposed to write about our experiences with each game, but that's taking a while. Regardless, it was a great initiative, and I'd love to do something similar this year. Events like these really tie the community together, and it has convinced me that Luna is a valuable addition to it.

Before Benny Disco tragically passed away from a severe case of explosive diarrhea, he was a very active and wildly entertaining member of our lovely community, who always seemed to have an equal amount of funny jokes and genuinely intelligent discussion. 

Okay, so he didn't actually die from his own poop, but I rarely see him these days. Maybe I'm looking in the wrong places, and he's "secretly" been around all along, but I kinda miss him. See, the reason why he really deserves a mention like this is that his absence is extremely notable to me. He just has too much going for him, so he can't exactly go quietly into the night. Maybe he launched himself from a catapult, in an attempt to get a high score. Seems like we'll never know.

In any case, there's no doubt that Sir Disco is truly the most amazing frog who's ever graced our site.

This is a difficult one, because I can't really put my finger on exactly why this guy has left such a big impression on me. I think it has to do with him saying and doing a lot of small things rather than a handful of larger ones, yet it all adds up to the same amount. I'm not really in the mood to do the math right now. All I know is that my instincts say "pick this guy", and I'm choosing to trust them.

What I can talk about is his username, and how proud I am of myself for remembering the second L in 'scholarly'. That seems to be a common mistake, but I am done with it! No longer shall I make that particular typo! There are plenty of others to make, and I barely havr tiem for tehm alll as id.

No but seriously, this dude is swanky as fuck, and you should all follow him on Twitter!

<3

He makes a lot of puns, and once had a show about food. That's two things guaranteed to get my blessing right away. I love puns and food!

I like Steven Hansen so much that I award his fancy name thingy with one of the best characters ever concieved: The Slugcat. Hansen is like our Slugcat.

Also, his last name is Scandinavian, which suggests that the blood of the North runs through him!

Also also, I think he made Rayman nachos once, which is super cool!

___

Again, if you're not on here, it doesn't mean I don't think you're awesome! It was a hard but honest list, and I hope that the people who made it on here really appreciate it. Otherwise, I'm gonna cry so hard that I'll vomit everywhere.

[Generic blog ending paragraph.]

Bye!

 









If you use Twitter and have any interest in video games, I strongly recommend that you follow Shuhei Yoshida. That man is a prime example of the kind of executive that benefits any industry, with his down-to-earth attitude and clear respect for the people who've gotten him to where he is. Needless to say, that respect goes both ways, as the guy is seen in a very positive light by many in the gaming community.

What makes things even better is that my personal favourite game ever, Ape Escape, also appears to be one of his. He was the producer of the game, and it was clearly a very personal project to him, as he has often mentioned it in interviews as something that means a lot to him. It certainly is something to be proud of

As such, it was through his Twitter that I was recently made aware of the fact that the original Ape Escape team has been having a reunion, and a night of dinner by a really long table.

Aside from just being really nice in general, this is insane news to me, as I never imagined these people still being in touch after all those years. The industry has changed so much, but it looks like these people are bound by more their careers. I guess it makes sense, though, considering the passionate product they've created. Everything about this is hearwarming and wonderful, and it really brightened up my day.

That said, this kind of news inevitably comes with a lot of speculation. Looking at the tweet's responses, people are already seeing this as an indication that a new Ape Escape has a chance of being developed for the PS4. This is definitely going to spread over time, no doubt about it, and a lot of fans are understandably going to be excited.

Personally, however, I won't get my hopes up. The franchise largely skipped the PS3 generation, only appearing in a half-hearted spinoff game, as well as an equally half-hearted crossover. Sony hasn't been showing any signs of wanting to do anything with the franchise. They've even refused to release the older games on PSN outside of Japan, for reasons that have yet to be explained, and because of this, I find it very hard to believe that they would allow the production of an entirely new installment.

To be honest though, I'm just happy to see the team being back together, having a good time and remembering what they've created. I wasn't expecting this to happen at all, and it is a very pleasant surprise in itself. These people have brought me and others a lot of happiness, and it's fantastic to find out how much it means to the developers themselves. That revelation alone is enough for me to be very satisfied, regardless of whether or not it's an indication of something larger to come.

I hope the food was delicious!









A lot of people have been writing big, ballin blogs about the games they've enjoyed in the year 2014, which have mostly included games from that very same year. I like following trends, so I've been wanting to make one as well. Only thing that's keeping me is one itsy bitsy problem. One hair in my soup. One splinter in my left buttock. One rock in my croc. One croc in my otherwise presentable collection of footwear.

I only played Octodad and Korra.

I am totally fucking serious with this one. The only games I played during 2014, which also happened to be released this year, were Young Horses' Octodad: Dadliest Catch and Platinum's The Legend of Korra. No Wolfensteins, Far Crys, Bayonettas or Mordors. How do I even get around the house with no Mordors???

Guess I'm just too cheap to dish out the high price of a new high profile release, so when something competent looking and affordable comes out, I turn my attention (and wallet) towards it? That said, I certainly wish to play most (if not all) of the games mentioned at some point, but it probably wouldn't hurt economically to wait a bit longer. I did buy and play plenty of older games during the year, so that's nice. But for making a list of my favourite 2014 games, it obviously won't do, so I'm stuck with a list of two games. Bogus, sure, but I'm gonna try and compare the two in a desperate effort to make it a bit more interesting. Not that it will be that long either way.

 

"OKAY, SO WHAT'S OCTODAD!?"

Octodad: Dadliest Catch is a game about a totally normal guy who hangs out and chills with his family a lot. Or so you think! You see, there's quite a bit of a twist near the end that I won't spoil, but it will blow your mind! Anyway, the game is basically about performing normal, simple tasks without fucking everything up. Then the developers realized that the game was way too easy, and decided to make the controls impossible. As a result, even taking a few steps is intensely difficult.

I really like this game's originality. While games like QWOP and... CLOP... have done similar things in the past, this is far more ambitious. There was technically another Octodad game before this, but that one felt more like a proof of concept than anything, while this one is definitely going to be the one that people remembers the most. It helps that it has a really catchy theme song.

Oh, and the collectible ties will take forever to find, so replay value!

 

"ALRIGHT THEN, HOW BOUT KORRA!?"

The Legend of Korra is a game about the world's most dangerous fantasy eskimo, who has the ability to control the four elements through different types of dancing: the swift wind of the breakdance, the cool waters of disco, the rocky stiffness of the robot and the fiery passion of salsa!

Korra is the name of our main character (we sure have come far since 1986). One day, a gang of generic bad guys take away her ability to be Super Jesus, making her more like me, who doesn't have super powers. As it turns out, being like me is simply unacceptable, and Korra is now going out of her way to regain her extraordinary super powers that no one else can have at the same time.

Bosses were kinda lame. I know that's kind of a sudden thing to jump to, but it is my biggest problem with the game by far. Had the bosses been more fun, varied and personalized, I may still have been playing this. Another lame thing is that the elements don't feel that different. Like, why does the air do direct damage, rather than blow enemies away? Why doesn't fire actually set things on fire? Other than this, however, I think it was a solid game. A half-swank, at least.

 

"OKAY, SO HOW DO YOU PLAN TO COMPARE THEM?"

Oh wow, way to put me on the spot, voice in my head!

I guess one way is to look at their budgets, as both of them were obviously low. What's interesting is that this comes through in different ways. While Octodad has very low-poly character and object models, Korra has better models but blander environments. Overall, I think I prefer the former approach a good deal more, as I find it far less noticable while actually playing.

But, honestly, that's just the tip of it. Looking at the amount of creative ambition for each project, Octodad curiously enough still seems to come out on top, despite being far more simple in both concept and execution.

See, you won't expect a game like Octodad to have a detailed backstory or a big climax against a threatening villain, but from Korra, with its epic fantasy world and mysterious lore, it's not extraordinary in the slightest. This means that, based on expectations alone, Octodad is the one that overdelivers, while Korra comes across as pretty tame. I honestly think this represents both games pretty well in general. I think Korra could have been so much more than it was, and I'm not sure I could say that for Octodad, should it not have turned into a completely different game in the process.

I guess, by default, it means that Octodad: Dadliest Catch is my favourite 2014 game, while The Legend of Korra is my least favourite. But hey, two games. Who cares? In the end, I had a good deal of fun with both, and I certainly don't regret buying either. Besides, the benefit of only playing two games is being able to do slightly more in-depth stuff that wouldn't usually make much sense. Had it been one game, I might have done a more complete review of it instead. That, or something way lazier.

Hey, guess what? I'm not having champagne this year, as I'm apparently not High $ociety enough for the stuff (or the store didn't have it, one of those reasons). Instead, I'm having crémant. Makes me wonder how many people actually drink champagne New Year's eve, compared to those who drink stuff that doesn't count. It's probably a minority, but the world is full of super ultra nubs who don't know the difference. The tiny, insignificant difference.

So with that in mind,

Happy New Year, Champagne, Crémant, or whatever else you plan to pour into your face!