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Podtoid Scenario Out of Context: Skeleton Warrior - Destructoid




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(I can only apologize in advance for this...)

A room lies ahead of you. On the door, a sign reads 'do not enter'.

Nosy, belligerent fucker you are, you open it anyway...

Inside the dull, filthy room, a balding man is kneeling on the floor, trousers down and asscheeks apart. He is eating KFC.

A rather overweight man in sunglasses has a bowl filled with trinkets, rare oddities from his grandmother's jewelry box it seems. Without skipping a beat, he grabs a few items and forcefully shoves them into the gaping fudge passage. As the recipient winces, a single tear runs down his cheek.

It slightly perturbs you to realize the second man is muttering something about skeletons, continuing these incantations as he plunges in a second handful. You notice a third man in the corner, silent, mustached, and wearing a cowboy hat.

Suddenly, man #2 leaps up and starts patting his pockets. "Pins, pins, pins..." he hisses.

Man #1 starts eating a chicken wing, sucking on the bones.

"Ow" he complains, as the overweight man starts pushing pins into the skin of his back.

The mustached man stares.

"It's not enough... it's not enough..." Man #2 growls.

A brooch, a necklace, a piece of broken tiara; each go up to no avail.

"Skeleton warrior arise... ARISE!"

Man #2's hand reaches forward toward a discarded chicken bone. Unsurprisingly, that too finds it's way up the man's sweaty chungus.

"Almost... almost..." Disorientated, the fat man stands up and stumbles over to a wobbly table, procuring several slabs of meat; nearby is a collection of pie tins, overgrown with mold and filled with a foul, grey-ish goop. You suppress a gag.

Yielding a roll of masking tape, the man begins to attach the slightly-rotten flesh to Man #1's face...

Having seen enough, you slowly begin to back out of the room.

The mustached man stares.



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