Let's get the obvious joke over with.
I love Rayman! Who doesn't love Rayman?
I would go so far as to proclaim that EVERYONE LOVES RAYMAN!

HILARIOUS.

Truth be told, I have nothing but deep affection for the Rayman franchise. The baby of famed game designer Michel Ancel(the major creative force behind the franchise, as well as of Peter Jackson's King Kong: The Official Game with the too long name) , the Rayman franchise has been a potent force in gaming since the mid-90's. Sporting wonderfully inventive worlds, wacky characters, stupendous art design, and fantastic platforming, Rayman has been the star of some of the greatest platformers of all time.

That is....he used to be.

Since the launch of the Wii in 2006, Rayman has been playing second fiddle to the Raving Rabbids(another creation of Ancel), and has been relegated to two minigame collections over the past two years. Now, if rumors are to be believed, Rayman will be straight up removed from the next installment of the Raving Rabbids game on the Wii. The thought of seeing Rayman disappear in the shadow of a minigame collection for the Wii is too much for my poor heart to bear. Rayman used to represent everything that was great about platforming, and, if I could entice Michel Ancel to save Rayman before giving Beyond Good and Evil its(also deserved!) sequel treatment, I would beg him to make the following changes to this storied franchise.

1. Minigame Collections? PFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTT!


It's 2008, game publishers! We aren’t going to fall for buying minigame collections anymore. Truth be told, the original Raving Rabbids game was one of the better games at the Wii's launch(because of its wacky style and hysterical minigames) but in 2008? Minigame collections are played out. Nintendo now has the minigame collection genre of games on lock(with the sublime, super inventive WarioWare: Smooth Moves) and the promise of "Swinging the remote over your head, like a Real(insert novel object here)!" no longer excites and enthuses. Players are better than it, developers are better than it, and Rayman is better than it. Pull Rayman out of his waggle wonderland and....

2. Bring back the 3-D platformer!


While the original Rayman game was a neat, colorful 2-D sidescroller, Rayman 2: The Great Escape was a god damn REVELATION. In an era when every publisher and their mother was trying to copy the freakish success of Super Mario 64, only Ubisoft's Rayman managed to 1-Up the Italian, with its fantastical worlds and endlessly inventive platforming. Rayman's bizarre universe was so filled with artistic delights and diverse stages that they put the collection-fest platformers of the time to shame(cough Banjo! cough). Rayman's world made those minigame collections on the Wii ridiculous, insane and funny, but a 3-D platformer would be able to do justice to our limbless hero's world, and provide him the eccentric situations that made for his amazing platforming back in 1999.

Speaking of 1999...

3. I mean the traditional 3-D Platformer!
Man! The 3-D platformer is in a weird state in 2008. After the Mario clone heyday of the late 90's, games still described as platformers took on and focused on the best aspects of genres other than platforming: Rachet and Jak focused more on the weaponry over time, Sly Cooper's stealth elements were as important to the game as the core platforming, and Psychonauts functioned essentially as an adventure game. Even Mario, trying to recapture the spirit and joy of his first 3-D romp, ended up dissapointing most in Sunshine. To remain a relevant franchise, Mario had to take the platformer as far as it could possibly go(SPACE!), and oftentimes function as more than a simple platformer. Now, with Rare announcing that Banjo and Kazooie would try their hand at vehicle customization, the time is RIPE for a traditional, good ol' fashioned 3-D platformer. And there is no franchise better equipped for traditional platforming than Rayman, with his focus on variety-stuffed levels, vibrant art design, and wonderful characters.

And the most wonderful characters?

4. ROBOT PIRATES.


THEY ARE ROBOTS BUT THEY ARE ALSO PIRATES.


FUCK YES.

Not since the Koopa Troopa has such an engaging and fantastic series of villains been created for a Video Game. Admiral Razorbeard and his robot pirate armada scoured Rayman's home world with the intent of enslaving everyone of the citizenry. Just menacing enough to be totally awesome, the robot pirates, who look like a cross between a steam engine and Jack Skellington, are completely and totally freaking awesome.

Don't get me wrong, I love the Rabbids and their.... weird screaming. I'd love to see a Rayman platformer where the main opponent was ridiculous Rabbids wearing Splinter Cell night vision goggles. It's like choosing between an Awesome Robot cake and a only slightly less delicious Cake that likes to scream at you. It's a catch 22....of violence!

Hell, I'd love to see a game where the the Robot Pirates in the sky were fighting a desperate and senseless war against the Rabbids for control of the ancient magics.

Oh man.......
5. The Robot Pirates in the sky were fighting a desperate and senseless war against the Rabbids for control of the ancient magics. Make it happen.

6. Platforming is the key, combat is not!
The one game in the Rayman franchise I've yet to mention is the series 3rd installment, subtitled Hoodlum Havoc. Best known as the Rayman platformer Michel Ancel did not work on, Rayman 3 focused on gaining different powers for Rayman's fists, and using those powers against environmental traps and enemies. It was a fine little platformer, but compared to the majesty of Rayman 2, it was easy to be disappointed by the new direction of the series.
Now, I'm not saying Ubisoft should remove combat from the game altogether: I just talked about how awesome it was to face off against the Robot Pirates. However Rayman was always best when the combat was secondary to the platforming. Sure, make it fun, but diverse and inventive level design should be the primary concern for the developers. A modern example: The game should be more POP: Sands of Time, with the focus on platforming, than POP: Warrior Within, with its more developed combat at the expense of amazing platforming...or a good story.

(MAN! Warrior Within sucked!).

7. Keep it weird!


In an age when many people just arn't willing to go out and buy any old 3-D platformer, any old generic platformer is never going to make it off shelves. Much of Rayman's success has to do with the inherent eccentrics of the character:
Rayman has no limbs.
His hair is a banana peel, and he can use it to fly like a helicopter.
He can throw his fists to attack enemies.
He can tame a wild rocket in the way a cowboy might tame a wild horse.
He can then ride that wild rocket like the aforementioned wild horse.
He can use a plum to float in lava.
He fights Robot Pirates.
Simply creating a colorful platformer isn't going to cut it in 08. Rayman's success was due mostly to the fact that there is nothing else in gaming quite like him, and no other game worlds as inventive as his homeland.

With a greater influence on weird platforming, and a terrific group of antagonists in the form of the robot pirates, a fourth Rayman platformer(and a official sequel to Rayman 2!) could literally offer something most game can't in this day and age. Most game players, it seems, won't purchase anything that isn't a lame street racing game, or a World War II FPS. Rayman is exactly the kick in the teeth the game industry needs: a charming, colorful, and genuinely weird character in an equally fantastical realm. Reality, as game players know, is a weak goal. Rayman is as far away from "the norm" of video games as any franchise could possibly be, and he's just the character that, in the right video game(traditional 3-D platformer with a focus on level design and fighting Robot Pirates) could bring some much needed spice to the medium.