hot  /  reviews  /  videos  /  cblogs  /  qposts


Dale North's blog
destructoid  Former Dtoid EIC

12:26 PM on 07.05.2012

Destructoid's staff and their animals

Many of the staff members at Destructoid have animals associated with them. Me? Corgis, of course. If you don't know that, you don't read Destructoid enough.

Also, look at my Pinterest board!

Chad and dolphins. Hamza and sharks. Brett is in love with pandas. Jonathan Ross adores capybaras. Max...likes bears and squid when they come together?

What other ones am I missing?

Related: Our in-office chat this morning should have me telling you to Google 'Ragdoll cats.'

Also, someone should do some custom art showing us and our animals. Like a unified animal attack force.   read

8:54 AM on 07.03.2012

Do you wear videogame t-shirts?

Do you wear videogame t-shirts? I suppose that's a silly question. Of course you do. I do. We all do. Well, hold on...

I do, but it's rare. Maybe I haven't done laundry in awhile. Or maybe I'm working in the yard, or exercising. I have nothing against game t-shirts, mind you. I think they're great, and wearing them shows my interests, and lets me show some of my gamer pride.

I definitely wore them more in my younger years. I'm getting old now, and I've set into wearing clothing that maybe has a bit more shape or form, I think. Ah, maybe I'm just a clothes asshole.

Anyway, I've noticed that when I do wear game shirts out and about, it opens the door to talking to others about my passion for games, my career, and the industry in general. I think that's fantastic. And it never fails -- I wear a game shirt and someone strikes up a conversation. Love it.

Last night, for instance: I went to a local BBQ place to fuck up some pulled pork and beans (and mac & cheese). I was served and it was good. Later, the guy that prepared my food came out and said he liked my shirt. (I was wearing a Prototype 2 t-shirt that Activision gave me at some event.) I asked him if he liked the game, and he told me it was 'better' than the first. I laughed and told him that was exactly what I had said!

The convo went on as we talked about the hardships the developer is now going through, and then moved onto how much money Activision has. Nice guy, nice talk.

This got me thinking: Why don't I wear game t-shirts more often?

[But I know the answer! They always give me a fucking XL or L. One time I got an XXL. I'm a fucking SMALL. I'm a bony fuck that has no meat on his bones. And what's really fucked is that A LOT of people in my field are thin/bony/small. Why do they always give us large shirts?!?!? Even a Medium looks kind of silly already. I have a damned mountain of L-sized shirts in my closet, never worn.]   read

2:05 PM on 08.15.2011


So this all happened at Destructoid while "working" today.


Dale : dynasty Dontcareriers 7

JimSterling: Dale, we'd have accepted Dy-NoWay Warriors for 10 points

Dale: Die, Nasty Borriars 7

JimSterling: Dicknasty Whorers 7

Dale: Va-GAI-NA-sty Horriers 7
your turn

JimSterling: CryGhastly Scurriers 7

Dale: haha

Jordan: Shitty McNipple Tits 7: The Reckoning

Dale: Why-MustThey More-iers 7

JimSterling: Balls 7: Balls

Jordan: hahaha
i would play that

Franchise Beat Senseless 7


Dale: hahah
*protects persona*


Dale: Dynasty Warriors 8: Jim Sterling
Dynasty Warriors 9: No one else at Destructoid is allowed to write about this game

JRoss: gah

NickC: terrifying.

Jordan: hahaha
that looks so ... natural

Dale: hahha
impressive game engine
skin texturing is beautiful
Da-nasty Warrior 7: Tatted Tit Flaps

Jordan: can we make that guy our mascot?
for images
just throw him in every image

his name from now on is Da-nasty Warrior

JimSterling: He is Old Man Yakuzatits

Dale: Old Man Yakuzatits is good

JRoss: Leaked screen of Shenmue 3

JimSterling: I might do a frontpage gallery, "Old naked dudes photoshopped into videogames"

NickC: that's not necessary
we're good, jim.

Dale: haha

Jordan: notice how nick didn't say don't do it   read

7:10 PM on 01.07.2011

Fuckin' CES is killing me

I love Las Vegas. Always have, always will. I'm the guy that argues with the locals and tells them that they don't know shit about their own town. Amazing food, amazing sites, beautiful people, great shopping - I could go on.

But this week in Las Vegas is fat nerds with backpacks on. This week in Las Vegas is cold and windy. This week is consumer electronics and weird people. My hands are cracked and busted from the cold and all the hand washing. I've never seen so many 3D glasses and people willing to wear them. Today I found myself eating lunch as far away as I could from the convention center so I could see normal people and hear normal conversations. I heard a convo about someone's house being taken by the bank. It was sad but I liked that conversation because it wasn't about TVs or 'what's goin' on tonight' or whatever. Oh, and by the way: Nothing is going on tonight. You're not getting into that party. No one knows you. No one likes you and that backpack.

I miss about 40% of my appointment times because the travel is so fucking fucked here. You should see the monorail lines. They're an hour long. I had appointments on the OTHER SIDE OF LAS VEGAS that were 30 minutes apart. It takes fucking 30 minutes to walk across the convention center! I show up late, apologize, or try to reschedule. These people sitting in these rooms all day have no idea.

Yuck. I'm going to go wash my hands again.   read

3:30 PM on 09.11.2009

UmUhUhUmmYouKnow - my Samit Tribute


This is my tribute to Mr. Browntown himself, Destructoid's own Samit Sarkar. Podtoid listeners have called him out for his abusive use of "um" and "uh" and "you know," you know. Give the mix a listen -- at the end you'll hear a string of all the individual ums and so forth pulled out of ONE episode of Podtoid.

Special thanks to Conrad Zimmerman for the inspiration and the help with the cutting up of audio.   read

2:49 PM on 08.25.2009

Why I love Destructoid


Also like:
-community/readers (best fucking people on earth)
-unique voice
-paycheck   read

10:24 AM on 07.11.2009

Everybody's Super Sonic Racing


As performed by Thomas the Tank Engine

Come on run away
You don't have to stay
We're nearly outta time
But you're doin' fine
So stay on track
And don't look back
Just feel the pace
Come on now race
Everybody's Super Sonic Racing
Try to keep your feet right on the ground
When you're Super Sonic Racing
There's no time to look around
We're just Super Sonic Racing
Running to the point of no return
Everybody's Super Sonic Racing
C'mon let the fire burn

Everybody, everybody, everybody
Everybody, everybody, everybody
Everybody, everybody, everybody

Everybody's Super Sonic Racing
Try to keep your feet right on the ground
When you're Super Sonic Racing
There's no time to look around
We're just Super Sonic Racing
Running to the point of no return
Everybody's Super Sonic Racing
C'mon let the fire burn

Don't you know
We really have to go
To a place
Where you can feel my heart just race
(Yeah, yeah)

Everybody's Super Sonic Racing
Try to keep your feet right on the ground
When you're Super Sonic Racing
There's no time to look around
We're just Super Sonic Racing (Super Sonic Racing)
Running to the point of no return
Everybody's Super Sonic Racing
C'mon let the fire burn

Everybody, everybody, everybody
Everybody, everybody, everybody
Let's go
Super Sonic Racing
Everybody, everybody, everybody, (oh yeah)
Let's go
(Ooh, yeah, ooh, yeah)
Super Sonic Racing
Let's go
C'mon c'mon yeah
C'mon c'mon yeah
C'mon, c'mon
Let's go
Everybody, everybody, everybody
Yeah everybody
Let's go
Super Sonic Racing
Oh, yeah
Super Sonic Racing (Let's go)
Everybody, everybody
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Let's go
Everybody   read

12:04 PM on 02.02.2009

Ten things you didn't know about Dale North

First off, the Dtoid community is fucking amazing. I keep putting this off, but here it is now.

1. I get ridiculous road rage. One one now infamous roadtrip with friends, I punched out a windshield in heavy traffic. The next day, while everyone was out partying, I was getting my windshield fixed.

2. I have an earring. I don't wear it much anymore. It's leftover from my wannabe rock star days.

3. I've had almost 40 jobs. The list is far too long to mess with now, but I'll put it up some day. Highlights include: Chimney sweep, medical tech assistant, fast food manager, computer technician, piano teacher, film developer, onion ring maker...

4. Music is my other life. People know about my connection to the OneUps, but they don't know the other things that I do aside from my full-time job as a geek journo. They don't know that I've sold songs as a songwriter to several publishing companies, work regularly as a musical engineer, have worked on going on 70 albums or projects for various independent artists and clients, and have a signed a contract to work on a pending Xbox 360 title next year as a composer.

5. I used to own a computer store. It was a local upstart that was making 10s of thousands in profit monthly by its first half year. Co-owned with four partners. We did service and repair for school districts, custom builds for public. Then a corrupt treasurer started stealing. The end.

6. I look like shit in a hat. I can't wear hats. They look fucking stupid and unnatural on me.

7. I've been arrested so many times that it's not even funny. Never convicted. Always arrested. Some things I've been picked up or questioned for : hit-and-run assualt (seriously), theft of WWII medals, theft of scrap metal, drunken fighting, throwing molotov cocktails, not shipping an eBay sale in a timely manner...

8. I get extreme motion sickness. I will not sit in the back of the van. I will not play FPS on anything bigger than 60" screens. And those simulated roller coaster rides? They fuck me every time. There's one at Disney World that goes through the human body on a virtual tour. It nearly killed me.

9. I grew up in Tokyo. From just after Kindergarden until almost 7th grade. When I go back to visit, it's not the Japanophile in me that takes over -- it's childhood memories. There's a fondness that I experience there that I can't explain, and it has nothing to do with games, anime, or manga. I love that city with all my heart.

10. I'm a former fatty. It was short-lived, but not easily forgotten. For the majority of my life, I've been excessively thin. Enough so that a teacher called a parent conference to question my 'rents for malnourishment. I stayed that way until the fall of the store in item #5. I got a bit depressed for about a year. Started working part-time selling games at Babbages (remember that shit?). I got over the depression quick, and I think food helped. I've always been a foodie, but with all that time doing nothing else, I ate and gamed and ate. Went from being thin to hitting a high I'm embarrassed to mention. Now? I'm normal. I have a very healthy diet and weigh in at about 185lbs.. In the end it worked out. Now I'm not scarily thin (size 29 jeans anyone?) and look like a normal human being.   read

1:12 PM on 01.29.2009

I'm rooting for the anti-sports team

I had a problem with my bank account. I always do as a full-time blogger. I call the bank and ask for help. And instead of that help, I get this:

"Which team are you rooting for?"

I respond: "The anti-sports team."

She scoffs and goes about fixing things for me. Not my income, but that's another c-blog post.

It just reminded me of how much I dislike sports. The face painting, the tailgate parties, the unnatural support thrown behind a group of men that just happen to live in the same town you do. Or men that go to the same school.

Or your life centered around a ball.

It's just fucking silly. I understand being a fan of things, like I am of videogames. I just can't relate to those that are on a one-track path to Super Bowl Sunday. They don't know anyone on the field. Nothing is going to happen in their lives if their team wins or loses. Nothing in their live changes (unless they're betting).

When they scream at the television, no one hears them. No one cares about your sporting-themed clothing except the others that wear it, and maybe those that wear an opposing team's garb.

Sport fans -- if you're that into a ball going back and forth, play a sports videogame! At least then you'll be entertained by something you can control.

Ok, i'm starting to sound stupid myself. There's even a .org page for all of the haters. I wouldn't go as far as saying "free our schools!" or whatever they're trying to say.

I'm just saying that sports aren't that big of a deal. Stop freaking the fuck out.   read

12:24 PM on 01.26.2009

Wit' so much drama...

Seriously? Read this and compare this man's crisis to your life:


The second page of this thread gets pretty classy as the conversation moves to the above pictured avatar of one member.   read

12:23 PM on 11.21.2008

Argo sucks

In response to my recent front page post, I wanted to respond personally to say how much Shadow of the Colossus' Argo sucks, especially when compared to Ocarina of Time's Epona.

First, let me say that Shadow of the Colossus is one of my favorite games of all time, easily ranking above Ocarina of Time for me. So it's not that.

I'm not talking on the story aspects of the horses here. I'm talking about the basic functions required as a transportation/battle horse.

Okay, horses are bred for only one thing (other than Meat in other countries), and that's to run a fucking straight line. Right? Well, this asshole couldn't run a straight line to save his life. Pun? Yes.

I died so many fucking times because of his half-assed running. Move, turn around. go this way you dick.

And what a shit turning radius for a horse when he was turning. All the dude could do is veer. Not turn. Not walk straight. Fucking veer left or right.

Worst is his lack of courage! He gets scared by anything. Even fucking steam coming out of the ground. He rares up on his hind legs like some kind of fucking pansy horse at anything.

I will say that my opinion has changed a bit after finding his move list, though. But he still sucks compared to Epona.

Epona was obedient as fuck. She stayed where you told her to stay, and ran when you called her. That's all I ask for in a horse. Not this veering and pansy-ass raring up.   read

4:01 PM on 09.22.2008

Cleanest house EVER

I'm kind of sick in the sense that I clean my house daily. I have a small place, but I clean at least one part of it daily. I have two dogs, and my house looks like it sometimes. I'm not a neat freak, but I can't stand trash and dishes and laundry lying around. I'll sweep or vacuum something as often as I can.

That's why it blew my mind when I saw this place. This was sent to Japanator tips by reader W.S., and while it had nothing to do with Japan, it was worth sharing.

The poster of these horiffic images seems to be a landlord or something. He says "We had a resident who had an outstanding balance for over a month and no one could get ahold of her. The Bookkeeper went inside after so many tries to leave a note and this is what we found."

The cigarette butts in the images kill me. It all looks deliberate. I'm guessing the resident of this place has some sort of mental illness. This looks like a movie set or something.

Can you believe this?   read

Back to Top

We follow moms on   Facebook  and   Twitter
  Light Theme      Dark Theme
Pssst. Konami Code + Enter!
You may remix stuff our site under creative commons w/@
- Destructoid means family. Living the dream, since 2006 -