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Hello there! My name is Chris. It's nice to meet you.

I am 21 years old and I have been playing games for my entire life. When I was one or two years old my parents would sit with me in front of the TV and help me play Atari. Actually, I might be making that up. I'm not sure, but it's definitely not far from the truth. I remember playing pac-man, and dig dug, and pong. Growing up, I've played through the NES, the Sega Genesis, PS 1,2,3, Gamecube, the XboX and the 360. I've played on more systems than that, but those are the most memorable. Games are something that have grown with me over the years and I'm always amazed by the progress of both.

I ride a motorcycle, I love to play ping pong, I'm not a virgin, I love high fives, I bounce between atheism and being agnostic. I celebrate holidays. I'm usually not a dick. I am also bi-sexual. I am mixed between black, puerto rican and some other stuff. I get laid rarely. That's on purpose. It's also not on purpose. I tend to break a lot of stereotypes, but not consciously. I am very open minded. And, I ponder things very often and I tend to get wrapped up in my own head. However, I love hearing anybody else's opinion unless it is purposely hurtful. Basically, I'm a good dude.

I like you.

-dig dug
-pole position(also, cocks)
-super mario bros 3
-duckhunt(fuck that dog!)
-mc kids
Sega Genisis
-mortal kombat 2(when i was like four years old)
-sonic 2
-combat cars
-power rangers the movie
-cesars palace
-lemmings 2 tribes(shit gave me a god complex)
-super hang on
-streets of rage
-the ren and stimpy show
-nba jam(jams it in!)
-road rash
-crash bandicoot(i want to try on that mask)
-ape escape
-tomb raider(ass, titties, ass and titties, ass, ass, titties, titties, ass and titties. and personality, of course)
-metal gear solid
-those jampacks were the shit
-spiderman 1 and 2
-splinter cell
-gta: san andreas(the best)
Xbox 360
-saints row 1 and 2
-gears 1 and 2
-gta4 episodes(should've just been a gay biker gang. am I right?)
-skate 2
-mirror's edge
-halo 3
-deadly premonition(thanks Jim)
-smackdown vs raw(sounds like a porno)
-guitar hero 3
-those demos are the shit aren't they?

I have been reading this site for a couple years and I've been leaving comments and posting things sporadically for a little less than a year. I just want to thank everybody for being so interesting, insightful, open minded, respectful and informative. I do my best to be the same. I truly respect what this site is, and all the people, and all of the hard work behind it. I am honored to be a part of it and I really do feel at home here.

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I was recently reading through the Weekend Destructainment. There are, as usual, a bunch of interesting videos to browse through. Now, there was one video in particular video about a running game. I watched and laughed as a possibly drunk person played what he call "the hardest game he had ever played".

The name of the game is QWOP.
I wasn't going to write a blog today, but then I played QWOP. And, I have to share my thoughts on it. It is a game where the goal is to make a dude run 100 meters. But, after watching the guy play it for a while I knew it wasn't going to be that easy.

It started off giving me the impression that there is nothing more than awful controls and watching a runner land, hilariously, on his face a few million times. That would be fine for a free flash game. But, just as that novelty started to ware off for me, I realized that I started making actual progress before slamming again.

See, this "running" game took the seemingly simple task of walking and made it "new" again.

Q contracts the left thigh,
W contracts the right thigh.
O contracts the left calf and
P contracts the right thigh.

The game isn't so much in the running itself, so much as it is learning how to walk. I felt, very much, like a toddler trying to figure his shit out. I was also reminded of how hard I sometimes, have to think about walking when I'm drunk. This game didn't hand me "out right intuitive" controls and then make me figure out the how rest of the game mechanics work. QWOP made it a game for me to just figure out the controls and that's it. It makes for an interesting experience.

It took me around a half hour before I hit my stride, but then I enjoyed the "simple" act of just running. It was short lived ,of course, as I soon lost my rhythm and slammed yet again. But, before that happened, I reveled in a feeling of immense progress and accomplishment.

The best part of the game is that, when I hit the sweet spot and started running, I was reminded of being a kid again on the brink of falling. See, I would run so fast that I would start to get scared. Then I would, in my state of mild panic, lose my rhythm. Then I would fall, bust my ass , roll on the ground and be in pain. Then, my classmate would laugh. Good times.

QWOP...I dig it.

In life, we gain memories from our experiences. They are usually locked in a room in our head and only we have the key. In fact, it's kind of like we have a big-ass janitor ring of keys and we can't seem to find the one that opens the door, at times. Especially if we are in a hurry.

Now, how would you feel if somebody were to walk up to you, shiny spare key in hand, look you in the eye, say "'sup bro", and proceed to unlock the door? He then looks around the room and tells you his thoughts on its content. You follow him into the room along with a few other people that happen to be standing around you. Some of them begin to chat about how much they loved the memory, while others complain about it. They then invite you to join in on the retrospective conversation about your thoughts.

I'd feel a bit hesitant.

But, after that initial gut feeling. I'd be glad to express my thoughts about my memories. I would shake off the sense of repulsion and I'd replace it with wonderment. It's cool to get a glimpse at other peoples reactions to the same memory. Besides, it's not like I have anything to hide...At least not in this room.

I am using this analogy to bring up video game memories. The same with memories about things that have happened to us in real life, we also gather digital memories. We can always talk about the same real life event, but it's always from a different perspective. Where as with memories from a video game are usually discussed from the same perspective. Whatever the perspective the game wants to portray. Movies and books and other media do this as well. Yet, with video games it, for me at least, tends to become a part of me. The memory becomes my own. But, the game is released for everybody to play.

And yet, when we all share one specific memory, I believe we all experience it differently. Based on our other, differing recollections. Be it the recollection of the game world or the story itself. It would seem that our feelings about it vary based on our memories of other games as well as real life occurrences. I think video games discussions are a great example of that.

As well as any discussion, really. I believe a lot of discussions are just our way of trying to see things from eachother's point of view. But, we are all unique and therefore we will forever continue to speak to eachother.

We are doomed.

I find this to be a fascinating concept. What is your perspective on the matter?
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11:54 AM on 12.16.2010


I got word today that Spike is partnering with a few videogame devs to release a "demo disk" ,of sorts, to coincide with next year's well respected Spike Video Game Awards.

I got a statement from the spokesperson of this project, Neil Patrick Harris.

"In an effort to improve on the complete success of this year's VGA's. We are going to release a video game version of next years show. It will basically be a stylized compilation of next year's winners, complete with avatar support. However, they won't be standard demos, as they will showcase the very best parts of each winner with no real sense of context and it will be presented in an award show-esque fashion. Also, Diddy will be featured in the game telling lighthearted jokes at the gamer's expense." Awesome...

"The retail disk will be released the same day that next year's TV program will be aired. I've been asked how we know who the winners will be in time to meet the game's release date. See, the winners have already been picked. We will be allowing our Spike audience to vote for their favorites, but they will most likely pick the same games that have already been chosen. For example, the Award for Best Earthling Automobile Racing Simulator is going to Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit. But, that's a surprise."

Mr. Harris, also mentioned, "Olivia Munn, has forced me to let her host the VGA's as well as the digital VGA's for 2011." He then implied that we might get to see her breast at some point in the game. I knew this because he made inappropriate gestures and a face that made me somewhat uncomfortable.

When asked about pricing, NPH responded,

"Oh, we will be charging full price for this bitch."

Well, there you have it...

My response to this year's VGA's is best summed up as "Meh. It was better than last year's, I guess." It looks like I'll be getting deja vu in about a year.

[Disclaimer- This story is completely fictitious. There is no such game, nor did anybody make such an announcement. Details about next year's winner's and host are falsified. No boobs for you!]
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Grand Theft Auto is one of my favorite games of all time. It just did so many things right. There have been a lot of advancements in the genre since that game has been released. GTA4 made everything pretty; the animations and textures are all phenomenal. Saints Row with its over the top vibe and atmosphere. It doesn't take itself seriously. All game genres have had a gradual yet, massive overhaul since San Andreas.

And yet, with all of these advancement, San Andreas remains one of the most immersive gaming experiences around. To this day when I play, I feel as if I am in its universe. Despite, how awful the game may look by today's standards, I feel like I am affecting the world. I go to the gym and get buff, and random dudes on the street tell me that I look swoll. I say "Ay, thanks!" and I proceed to get my ride all set up for the lowrider competition.

And, as my story continues, I find myself getting heckled about my dance moves at the club, I get lost in a field somewhere and I bust on some fools that are trying to front on my territory, as it were. I'm in it. I am there. Grand Theft Auto has fooled me again into believing that it is the 90's. There are so many small touches in the game that look at my wall of disbelief, demolish it, and then proceed to make the disheveled wall it's inanimate bitch. But, there is one touch that went right over my head and I didn't even notice it until recently.

...That radio is something special.

I recently read the wikipedia article of San Andreas' soundtrack and I was blown away at how in depth it really went. I had somewhat realized what the radio was doing while I was playing the game but, I had never really stopped to appreciate the full scope of it. As I read about the different DJ's and the commercials and the various connecting storylines, my mind went back and remembered so many different moments that were written there. I recall laughing at this or cringing at that. They even give weather forecast. It's amazing. There are feuds and arrest and, all of this was going on the whole time my plot as a gangster, as a "normal" citizen of this world, was happening.

The radio actually makes me feel like some NPC. It's a different perspective of the game world and that really seems to make the world what it is.

Sometimes, in real life, I get a bit to wrapped up in my own head and I feel a bit detached. So the next time I need to feel immersed, just like in San Andreas,

...I'll turn on the radio.

Here's the link if you're interested.
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At the beginning of last month, it started appearing. Or, at least, I had begun to notice it. It was happening and, there was nothing I could do to stop it. Christmas was beginning its merciless assault. I got annoyed and I tried to pretend that it didn't exist...

This month, I have come to terms with it. Thanksgiving is over and, I can no longer feel upset that it was being overshadowed yet again by this, The Christmas Monster. It is in the past but, sadly the red and green holiday is still here. That is to say, the overwhelming feeling is here. There are so many jingles and merry time movies and obnoxious sweaters, I just want to flip out and show St. Nick how naughty I can really be. But, before I do anything crazy, I pop in GTA4 or HALO, cause some mayhem and I feel better...

I could complain about the consumerism but, I won't. Instead, I will complain about the fact that everyone seems so happy. As my personality seems to be largely apathetic, it's all a bit much. It's not that I don't like happiness. It's just that it all seems so artificial. It just doesn't feel real. And, really, that would be fine. People can pretend all they want. Good for them. But, the fact that I feel pressured to participate is exhausting. "Come on. Get in the spirit!". No, I don't want to. But, I do. That is, I try to seem happy. I try to feel as exuberant as everybody wants. Or, at least just enough to not seem like an outcast...It's like going from 0-60 in three seconds....if you get carsick...

Gift giving. It's too much. I'm sorry. I want to, I really do. But, I am in a tight spot financially and I would love nothing more than to give my friends and family a great gift that they deserve but, every year I fail. This bothers me on a few points.

The first is that this time of year, everything is so materialistic. Everybody builds up give giving and such. The coolest gifts are advertised.
But, for me that's not the problem. Gifts are cool. I like gifts. I just wish they didn't have to be expected at one particular point in the year. For some reason or another, I just never seem to have money this time of year.

Growing up, my family made Christmas so special for me. So, it's not like I'm bitter about not having a good Christmas growing up. I'm just bitter that I can't seem to return the feeling. It bums me out...

Other notes, would be how annoyed I am with decorating. I don't like doing it, I don't like taking shit down. I don't know. Maybe, I'm the Grinch. The lights are pretty though.

Then again, this is probably just in my head. Maybe nobody really expects anything from me. But, this year, like every year, I will do my best. Not, only to survive but, also to try to make others happy.

Good luck everybody.
Happy Holidays
...Yes, Happy Holidays.(Deal with it.)
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There are some games out there that are masterpieces. Beautiful games that in all their glory, leave very little to improve upon. That is not to say that they can't be made better...It's just that sometimes games are so good and so utterly enthralling that my mind is blown and I have nothing that I feel would be appropriate to add. I can't name any game of that caliber off the top of my head, and that almost helps the point that I am trying to make. While a perfect ten may have the looks and the raw sex appeal, they don't seem to get my mind racing and I tend to forget about them in the long run. But, let's talk about video games shall we?

For me the one thing about video games that really puts a smile on my face is when there is a little to be desired at the end of it. And, it would almost seem like that would be a sad thing. One would think that If I finished a video game and thought to myself,"Man, that game had so much potential.", that I would be kinda bummed out. But, oddly enough that is never really the case for me.

My favorite games suck. Well, according to popular opinion it would, at least, seem that way. Some of my all time favorites are, Marc Ecko's Getting Up and, Mirror's Edge. Now, these aren't the only games on my favorites list but, they best describe what I am talking about.

Marc Ecko's Getting Up is a great example of what I'm yammering on about. As soon as one reads the title, they instantly know that there is something to be left desired. This is a game that I played at a very young age and, through my rose tinted glasses, it's difficult for me to criticize its faults. The general consensus was that the combat was a bit off and the general control was a bit janky and, I would be hard pressed to disagree. It was a game that left a bit to be desired. And, that is why I was so enamored with it. For me, the story was there. An angsty and rebellious young lad who fights the power on the regular, if you will. I would actually sit in class and draw the characters and imagine what the city of New Radius was like. What was it like to live there as a social norm abiding citizen. What happens next in the story? I wonder...I often do.

Mirror's Edge is also a game that jives with my supposed "point". This game waited till the end to make me want moar from its title. Once I had reached the climax of this game, I thought to myself,"There is a blatant lack of mirrors in this game.". Forget about the combat and, forget about the fact that you can't look down and see your own cleavage. This game had one goal and that was to make moving around the environment fun. And, I believe it was done with excellence. In my humble and possibly invalid opinion, it did a fantastic job of giving a feeling of fluidity and a sense of having an actual body in a video game. After I beat this game, I set off in the actual world to learn the basics of parkour. I've been practicing it for about a year and a half now. And, it was this game leaving a bit to be desired that managed to get my lazy ass out of the house. And after some experience in the practice, I would like to see more of an open world in Mirror's Edge. I always felt a bit alone in the game as well, so I wouldn't mind some more fleshed out characters and NPCs. And, just like the city in Marc Ecko's Getting Up, I would like to see what makes this porcelain city tick. And, I'd really like an appropriate amount of reflecty things, as well.

Now, I'm not a game designer. But, the fact that these games urge me to think creatively and vividly about the hobby that I love; really makes me happy. I guess that I, like the many dreamers out there, want to see something different. It's nice to see something new and to see a team take a risk. It may not always work but, the games that materialize from this method always seem to have potential. And, that, in part, gives me hope for the future...sometimes.
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