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Community Discussion: Blog by Cowzilla3 | WORKMAN RETURNS! Still can't drink.Destructoid
WORKMAN RETURNS! Still can't drink. - Destructoid




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About
Hi,
Names Matt Razak and I'm just a gamer with a Wii and a 360 and PS3. I'm also really, really, really, ridiculously good looking and a ninja...and humble. I'm the Editor and Chief at Flixist.


Things I've Done or Am Doing

Front Paged
Music In Gaming
What is a Hero?: Sonic
Good Idea, Bad Idea: Casual Gaming
What No More Heroes Really Means
Social Activism in Gaming
Educate Yourself - Castlevania
Start of the Affair
What is a Hero?: Lara Croft
Wii Fit Review

Recognizing Your Gaming Journalist
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

Drinks Ron Workman Can't Handle
Metroid Mojito
Mario Mudslide, The Super Punch Out, Princess Peach Schnapps
Pikachu Punch, Triforce Triple
DK Daquiri, Yoshi Jager, Mother Brain Drain (MBD)
Rocks on the Scotch, Bowser Bad Ass

Interviews With Famous People
Nick Frost, Simon Pegg, Edgar Wright
Richard Shepard
Michael Davis
Jason Schwartzman

What Happened?
The First
My Favorite One
To be continued...?
Obviously there are tons more, but I'm not linking them all.

Interesting Walls of Text
Gaming Journalsim
How do we discuss games as art?
MAGFest
My Great Concern



What is a Hero?
Introduction
Link
Solid Snake
Mario
Samus
Master Chief

Educate Yourself
Kid Icarus
Kid Icarus Final Impressions
Splatterhouse
Splatterhouse Final Impressions
Fall Out

Player Profile
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Ron "named after Harry Potter's bitch" Workman is back! I've seen it with my own eyes as he stumbled down some stairs into a back alley to give a hobo some oral pleasure for money. Jokes on him, hobos don't have money!

I assume in his absences he was attempting to out drink me by traveling to Tijuana and consuming rare tequilas that give you massive drunkenness power (but seriously decrease your Eve). I laugh at this, as I traveled there too and replaced all the tequila with ill tasting water! You're only acting drunk, Ron, stop faking and man up. Meanwhile I've deposited more liqueurs in my body than David Hasselhoff, Mel Gibson and Lindsay Lohan on a bender in LA.

Not seeing straight, Ron? Fuck that, I've gone blind.
Can't walk easily? Bullshit, I've resorted to crawling and even that is getting really hard.
Vomiting up lunch? Are you even trying Ron? I've puked up my stomach so I can't even eat lunch in order to vomit it up.

Listen, Ron, buddy, pal, dude, gaylord, if you really want to catch up try these:








But for cereals Ron, good to have you back telling me how much I suck. Feel the love? Good, cause I'm so drunk I can't feel anything!

BURN!



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