Ok not really my penis, but the really handsome man that it's attached to.



1. I have a top hat!

My sister bought me a top had during my birthday excursion to New Orleans last month. What first started out as a joke, has evolved into a bigger plan. UnstoppableJuggernaut and I plan on pretending we're British at PAX this year, and all British people wear top hats right?!? Of course they do...

2. I don't drink as much as most D-toiders think I do.

I drink WAY more than you think I do.

3. I care...

In fact, I probably care a little too much. Some would call me a bleeding heart, but I just call myself a sociologist. Right now I'm writing my master's thesis on the effects of rural poverty on women, and how discrimination compounds with the general lack of jobs and the limited scope of the industry in those rural areas. I grew up having a single mother, and now I want to try everything in my power to try to help all single parents.

4. My first love was music..

As long as I can remember, I've been a huge music fanatic. It started with my Mom showing me Led Zeppelin, and kind of spiraled out of control from there. I was in various bands for about 7 years, attended Middle Tennessee State Univ for courses in music production, and even wrote reviews for a couple Nashville publications when I was 16 years old. I've pretty much settled down on the performance aspect, and honestly, video games have become a new passion of mine. I still screw around on the drums from time to time.

5. Contrary to popular belief, I didn't get these scars on my face from a prison knife-fight.

I was bitten by a dog when I was 3 years old. It took off half of my face, and left my nose hanging by a thread of skin. Over 300 stitches and 2 plastic surgeries later, I'm sexier than ever.

6. I have a very short attention span

Like many people in our age, I can't pay attention to anything for more than 10 seconds. I can't watch entire movies or television shows in their entirety in one sitting. Gaming seems to be the exemption to my attention issues, but for years I would never beat any of the game that I would play. I started forcing myself to go back and beat games that I didn't finish when I was younger. It has proving to be quite the undertaking, but has paid off immeasurably in my reborn love for classic games.

7. I FUCKING DESPISED FINAL FANTASY VII !!!

FFIX was way better... VIVI 4 LYFE!!

8. I've had many homes

Galveston, TX; Nassau Bay, TX; Houston, TX; Deer Park, TX; Detroit, MI; Grosse Pointe, MI; Glennie, MI; Spring Lake, NC; Ft Bragg, NC; Ft Campbell, KY; Clarksville, TN; Dover, TN; Nashville, TN; Antioch, TN;

I think that's it... maybe

9. I care for many D-toiders like fam...

I'm not kidding even the slightest bit. PAX changed my fucking life for the better. I had no idea that I would have so much in common with many of you guys, and I wouldn't hesitate a second to take a bullet for any of you. Well... most of you anyways.

10. There is one thing about my penis

It made the coolest kid on the face of the fucking planet. Meet Jack Hogan.... Devourer of Planets... Destroyer of Civilizations... multiple ranked match winner of Soul Calibur IV.



He will eat your face!