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About
(Banner crafted by the lovely COM 01)

I got an NES for Christmas when I was 6.
I'm 31 now.
Here are some random things I'm into:



































The Buy it/Avoid it Report - back issues
#001 - Ilomilo, Uncharted 2, Infinity Blade, Pac-Man CE DX, Battlefield BC2: Vietnam, PixelJunk Shooter
#002 - Batman: Brave & Bold, DJ Hero 2, Dead Space 2, Bionic Commando Rearmed, Marvel vs. Capcom 3, Bulletstorm
#003 - Pokemon Black/White, PixelJunk Shooter 2, Monster Tale, God of War III, BIT.TRIP RUNNER, Torchlight
#004 - Portal 2, Steel Diver, Sin & Punishment Star Successor, Pilotwings Resort, Crysis 2, Blocks That Matter
#005 - L.A. Noire, Alice Madness Returns, Resident Evil Mercenaries 3D, Shadows of the Damned
#006 - GoldenEye 007, Insanely Twisted Shadow Planet, AC: Brotherhood, Sword & Sworcery EP, Trenched
#007 - Deus Ex: Human Revolution, Jetpack Joyride, Gears of War 3, The Binding of Isaac, Renegade Ops
#008 - Dark Souls, League of Evil, Uncharted 3, Batman: Arkham City, Super Mario 3D Land
#009 - The Buy it/Avoid it Report's Awards - 2011
#010 - Spelunky, Max Payne 3, Trials Evolution, Mario Kart 7, Escape Goat
#011 - Super Hexagon, Tekken Tag Tournament 2, Lollipop Chainsaw, Mark of the Ninja

Secret Moon Base - episodes
Subscribe on iTunes - a podcast about video games and other stuff with my pals knutaf and Occam

The Binding of Isaac - blogs
Blood, Shit and Tears - a love letter
Instruction Manual - w/ tips and tricks for beginners

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Twitter - @17wizards
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Like many other gamers my age, my personal video game journey started with the original Super Mario Bros on the NES. Though nostalgia may have grossly exaggerated my memories of those early days, there’s no question that they served as the catalyst for what can only be described as a passionate 25 year video game obsession.

Games have changed a lot since then. As they strive to become more complex, the controls have also become more complicated. Graphics and sound are reaching new levels of realism every year and the machines we play them on have skyrocketed in complexity and power. While this rationale serves first-person shooters and action/adventure games very well, I still believe that the best platformers are the ones that stay true to their forefathers.

Super Meat Boy is a brilliant example of this and stands as a testament to the virtues of classic simplicity.



In the spirit of accessibility, the controls are deceptively easy to grasp. Running and jumping are your only two means of traversal, but by no means is that a limitation. Meat Boy can sprint and leap around with insane momentum, often covering what seems like impossible distances in a very short amount of time. Once in the air, he can change direction at your command and weave between various hazards with relative ease. Thanks to a generous vertical wall slide, he can also travel straight up just as easily.

Those pinpoint controls quickly become a necessity considering the sheer amount of traps that stand between our skinless hero and his princess, Bandage Girl. Mounds of broken glass, saw blades, turrets, spikes, rocket launchers and lasers can all end your run instantly if even so much as a pixel touches them. It’s important to remember that each death in Super Meat Boy teaches you an invaluable lesson - never ever do that again. I’ve personally suffered over 25,000 lessons, and I’m still learning.

To combat the demented level of difficulty, Meat Boy has a respawn time of approximately one second and an infinite pool of lives to back it up. With no time to mourn your own death, there is no choice but to get out there and try again. And again. Each mistake brings you that much closer to victory. With the tools to complete each stage right there in front of you, the only traits required to succeed are patience and bravery. In my case, an absurd amount of stubborn confidence and poor posture can eventually work as well.



Though the superb controls provide a sturdy foundation, Super Meat Boy doesn’t just get by on them alone. The graphics are reminiscent of the 16-bit era, with bold colors and hard edges accented by some lovely lighting and particle effects. The trail of blood Meat Boy leaves on any surface he comes in contact with is an especially nice touch. To top it all off, the whole package is complimented by an amazing soundtrack composed by (the now famous) Danny Baranowsky. It’s a powerful, energetic mix that continues to motivate well after the thousandth time it repeats. Hell, you’d think I’d be sick of it by now but I still can’t get enough of it.

It’s a good thing the soundtrack is wonderful because the game has an absolutely ridiculous amount of content for being a downloadable title. Over 300 stages make up the main game, each of which can take anywhere from a few seconds to a minute or more to complete. The environments range from forests and rooftops to hospitals and fiery hell caves. Xbox 360 players have access to an exclusive chapter called “Teh Internets” which delivers even more stages every couple months, all completely free of charge! With leaderboard support for each individual stage, a competitive person like myself can spend a lot of time painstakingly shaving off those precious milliseconds.

In essence, Super Meat Boy is a heartfelt love letter to platforming enthusiasts. It’s fast, intense, difficult and magnificent. A modern classic and my favorite downloadable title of all time, hands down.




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Legacy Comments (will be imported soon)


You already know my views on Meat Boy, and they coincide largely with yours. I've long since bowed to your supremacy in leaderboard times, but I try to stay at least a little competitive! You've delivered a great survey of the game with your signature peppy style. I guess I just called you peppy. I hope you're okay with that.

I'm sitting pretty at over 38000 deaths now, since I started playing the internets levels. The Expert Remix levels are especially hard, god. My own method for success involves throwing myself at the wall thousands of times until I eke by. Seriously, I have no skills, only muscle memory.
"Over 300 stages make up the main game, each of which can take anywhere from a few seconds to a minute or more to complete."

Or hours. I'm looking at you, Kid.

Beating every level in Super Meat Boy and unlocking every character is one of my proudest gaming achievements. So many deaths, and so many tears, and so much rage, and it was all worth it.
I think Knut just called you a rabbit.

Super Meat Boy is a great game. I have no shame in admitting though that I had gotten to a part in it that I don't think I could beat without edging myself a little closer to death through the stress of it all. Whether I'll go back and try again i'm not sure but I do have to respect the level of craftsmanship they put into this game. If only I knew the sweet touch of 'The Internets' ehich just goes to show Team Meats dedication.

I know Knut mentioned Blocks That Matter to me, but have either of you played Aban Hawking & the 1000 Spikes of Death? Kind of reminded me of Meat Boy, without the precision jumping but with the shit through the eye of a needle approach to stage completion.
I love this game but I can't play it anymore, for the dehydration reasons you already mentioned.
*bzzzz*

"FUCK!"

*bzzzz*

"FUCK!"

whish

"Ha, you missed me that ti-"*BZZZZZ*

"FUUUUCK!"

Oh man, this was a fun, but frustrating at times. Good write up.
Fuck the fucking Kid.
knutaf - I'll allow it. Also....38,000!!! Whoa, I need to start catching up! /competitiveness

bbain - Same here. What's so wonderful about The Kid is he's really useful for some of the harder stages. That double jump is glorious.

Qalamari - (no barrel roll jokes please)

garethxxgod - I've heard of it but have yet to check it out. I think I'll take a cue from Stevil here and proceed to YouTube.

Caiters - The sad thing is, I cry when I'm happy too. Hydration is always a concern for me when I play SMB.

meteorscrap - Ha, thanks man! "Fuck" is the official word of Super Meat Boy

Mr Andy Dixon - The Kid forgives you.
Super Meat Boy is one of the best games I've played in an extremely long time.
I know I should at least familiarize myself with this title; everything about it seems great. It's just that platforming frustration is a feeling I just hate - the payoff just doesn't fire off enough happy chemicals in my brain to justify it.

(I don't totally hate platformers - I loved SMB3 and SMB World - but I do have to admit it's not a favorite genre of mine.)
Something about Super Meat Boy just couldn't keep me lured in. Lack of strong competitive spirit? Poor motor control? Who knows. But, like any game that bunks the trend and does something new, I have to love it for it's ingenuity and creativity.

Bravo, Team Meat.

And bravo to you too for this blog, Corduroy Turtle.
I remember when Meat Boy was just a Newgrounds game. I loved that game, and I admire Super Meat Boy. Great blog!
fulldamage - The short stages and quick respawn time might help ease you into it, though I can understand if platformers just aren't your thing.

AwesomeExMachina - I can totally understand that. I guess it appeals to my stubbornness, like it's trying to break me. The point at which normal people put the controller down and move on to more productive things is the moment I lean forward and really dig in. Thanks man.

rexwolf2 - I remember playing that version and hating the keyboard controls. I've always been more of a console man myself. Thanks!
It's an all around incredible game.
Very nice writeup! I somehow managed to 100% the XBLA version, and for dessert I want to give the pc version a go at some point. :)
When Super Meat Boy was released, I knew I would get 200/200 on it. I have since learned that I in fact SHALL NOT.

It is insanely fun, but for 100% completion it asks me to do things I simply cannot.
Good post! I love me some Meat Boy. I also like the hard trial and error type of playstyle...eventually you can get kind of a zen thing going and just fly through the levels while feeling so pro (especially of you have friends watching!)
Magnalon - Agreed.

ScottyG - I'm waiting on the Mac version because I bought a Mac. I really want to try some of the player created content!

KyleGamgee - Keep trying man. I did it somehow though I'm not really sure how.

Telephis - I want to live inside that zen feeling. Thanks!

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