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About Me
I am the News Editor at Destructoid. I write about videogames for a living. That last sentence is as awesome as it sounds, though not always in the ways you might think.

I also play host to Destructoid's live streaming satellite studio, Couchtoid. From there, we broadcast Backlog, an attempt to work through my stack of old games one hour at a time (Weeknights, 10pm Pacific) and Saturday Morning Hangover where Dtoid writer Jordan Devore and the always lovely ImpossiblePlant play often painful games for your amusement (Saturdays, 10am Pacific).

I'm fond of all types of gaming, either on a screen or a tabletop. In terms of video games, my interests vary wildly from platformers (2D preferred) to RPGs and the occasional FPS. The greatest game of all time is Mega Man 2 and any suggestion otherwise will be met with swift vengeance.

E-mail: conrad@destructoid.com
Twitter: ConradZimmerman
Jenny: 867-5309

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Pinball FX 2 (XBLA)
Pac-Man Championship Edition DX (XBLA)
Geometry Wars 2 (XBLA)


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About Rodney Dangerfield:



The mere inclusion of Rodney Dangerfield can vastly improve anything. Films, music, toasters, anything. In particular, the force of Rodney Dangerfield could elevate video games to the level in which they are accepted by the mainstream as a true art form, bringing together people of all races, creeds and tax brackets in peace and harmony.

RIP Rodney.

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CBlogs of 04.14.08 + Zimmerisms
Conrad Zimmerman | 11:25 PM on 04.14.2008 19 comments


It started out so sweet, so innocent. But, as happens to all of us as we go through life, this day was eventually corrupted by a massive amount of fail in the final hours. So it goes. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present: Le Recap. Zimmerisms follow.


*- My desire for this burns hotter than a bad case of chlamydia
*- Unbelievable Haloez betrayal
*- Film Industry still worried games are taking their revenuez


A- Game Endings and Sequels (Tamz)
A- What has MS changed int he 360 over time and what will the next iteration entail? (B-Radicate)
A- When did gamers start becoming "nerds"? (Clockwork)
A- Top Five Boss Fights (EternalDeathSlayer)


C- CBlog Xbox Scavenger Hunt (Ends 4.31)
C- that audiosurf contest (Ends 5.2)


E- Party at Dexter's this weekend!
F- It's AMMO MOOnday! Help get that game tested!
F- It's also PS3 Poker Night!
C- Picking the right school for game design program
C- Naia was selected to test Puzzle Quest
C- Contribute to Excremento's "Weird Kid's Top 100" list.
B- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TETA!
RIP- pizzaface loses a friend


N- Watch Power-Glove pull these XBLA releases out of his hat
N- This week's Euro releases
N- CoD4 on sale at amazon, but by now you're too late anyway
N- Smash Dojo finishes its run
N- Famitsu article on an erotic game coming to Wii (in Japan)
N- OXM UK's review of GTA IV is online
N- Portable Emulator Pandora is coming
N- IGN interviews brothers responsible for Homestarrunner about new game
N- Free Metal Gear Online beta keys, but you're already too late by now
V- Old video of O'Reilly pimping Super Mario Bros.
V- Oblivion running on Crysis engine
N- A bunch of copypasta about Metal Gear Online
T- Super Dodgeball's music kicks ass
T- New caps of Tomb Raider Underworld
T- Radio stations in GTA
T- Looking back on MDK2
T- Debate on the difference between quality and "fun" in games
T- Another tale of XBLA DRM woes
T- Showing J-RPGs a little love
T- CGgamer review of GTA IV
T- How to get started in Kingdom of Loathing
T- Retraction of negative comments regarding Gamefly
T- Pics and it still didn't happen? (Sadness)
T- More character analysis in Brawl
T- And an analysis of some Brawl stages
T- Can Banjo 3 save Rare?
T- Maybe the solution is another Killer Instinct?
T- It's okay, I don't understand MMOs either
T- Game design is all about the benjamins, baby
D- Luc Bernard
D- Wedge shows us how he does animations


A- Mass of game fanart
S- Manga and Anime DVD for sale
S- What did you buy last week?
S- Awesome steampunk Star Wars toys
S- Venture Brothers figures
S- Dolla, dolla bill, ya'll. The cheap Dtoid shirts are showing up in homes, including mine


R- Hip-Hop meets Chess
R- No More Heroes cake
R- If only a cat would actually get in the damn thing
V- SNL and old Micro Machines ads
R- This would be Lulz if it were funny
R- A choice that might be difficult for some.
V- Have a hundred beer bottles, an RC car and way too much time?
R- Happy Dolphin Day!
R- Miyamoto: Most influential person in the world?
R- LongDeth's Capcom fighting game collection
V- Only watch this video if you're
?- Maybe you can tell me what the hell this is
?- Not sure where they came from, but their Podcast is decent


S- Slow, but has a good overview of the GTA IV review in OXM if you don't want to click through
S- Even slower than the post above it, this post has no redeeming quality
S- The new guys beat you to it
S- You can say that you were slow
S- I've seen heroin addicts faster than you
F- What was wrong with your mind was intentionally failing
F- WTF?
F- You know, you can go back and edit posts
F- Better not fuck with him. He's taking karate.
F- Breaking Rule No. 1 twice in twenty minutes
F- Three times in forty. At this rate, he'll hit 100 by Wednesday morning.




I have a cat named Ramses. I love cats because they're so self-sufficient. As long as I continue to provide him with food and water, he will continue to love me in nice, even doses when it's convenient for him. Cats are a lot like people and I appreciate that.

Ramses, however, is about as smart as bronzed horseshit sometimes. The desk which houses my pathetic computer is next to the window of what I alternately refer to as an office or study (depends on what I'm reading at the time). This window looks out onto the balcony of my second floor apartment, from which the view of the outside world looks squarely at the wall of an adjacent apartment building. Still, Ramses likes to go out there and look at the neighborhood strays who pass by or bugs or whatever it is a cat can stare at for an hour. When he wants to come back inside, he stands at the balcony door and meows. It's a good system and we like it.

When I'm at the computer, typing away, he stands on a chair by the window and paws at it, meowing to get my attention. So, why is he such an idiot? I leave the door open all winter long. He's been getting my attention to let him in for the last four months with an open door that he could just walk through at any time without my involvement.


Damn my camera's default flash position... I'll try later to get a better photo


If he wasn't so damned adorable, I'd probably perform a mercy killing.


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18 comments | showing # 1 to 18
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Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2008 23:33
Wedge
Did you ever consider perhaps there is an invisible barrier only you can breach to allow the cat in? Huh? Did you?

Also that picture makes your cat look like sort of like a pug, which is freaky.
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2008 23:35
MrSadistic
Your cat wants to kill you in your sleep.
Silverhertz's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2008 23:46
Silverhertz
Your cat is a vampire, he needs to be invited in
007's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2008 23:51
007
Something tells me that that cat has not seen a good past.


AKA You raped him... in his tiny butt hole.
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/14/2008 23:55
MrSadistic
poor little furry butt-hole
vexed alex's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 00:12
vexed alex
Muchas gracias, Conrad!
smurfee mcgee's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 00:39
smurfee mcgee
your cat wants the attention, not the door. what an ass.
another excellent recap
Shin Oni's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 00:40
Shin Oni
Ramses wins this blog. He looks like he has a victory pose after a fight and you sir, have lost.
Conrad Zimmerman's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 00:42
Conrad Zimmerman
smurfee: Normally, I'd agree with that assessment. However, when I do get up and walk round the corner and he runs in, he invariably goes to either the bedroom or kitchen windows and resumes staring at god-knows-what. No, he's just stupid.
Victor Stillwater's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 01:45
Victor Stillwater
Your cat has demon eyes. KILL IT! KILL IT!
Samit Sarkar's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 02:42
Samit Sarkar
I think Ramses has a question for you.

Also, great recap!
Wexx's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 04:57
Wexx
Your cat is all "Noooo, attention-a-tize me cap'n!
BlackSheep's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 07:53
BlackSheep
your cat looks JUST LIKE mine.

awesome.
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 08:19
blehman
Your cat = teh awesome. Those fail blogs = teh not.
TrailerParkJesus's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 08:51
TrailerParkJesus
*high fives kitty*

...

*picks up laptop from floor*

good cap
Knivy's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 15:00
Knivy
Kitty wants you dead!!
EternalDeathSlayer's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/15/2008 15:14
EternalDeathSlayer
Well done, I just saw this now.
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