One of the things I love about EA is the way you can upload your goals on FIFA 09 as soon as you've put them into the back of the net. I haven't bothered to do this before. Yeah, I score cracking goals all the time but I always think I can do a little bit better.

Last night, around the midnight hour or later, I was having a battle with my flatmate. France Vs. Spain. The score was 0-0 and he was having some joy down my end of the field. Something had to give, so I broke away quickly, releasing four passes that ended with Fernando Torres on the far right and then... Well, what happened next caused me to yell loud enough to wake up even the heaviest sleeping neighbour.

Ladies and gentlemen, THIS is what happen when you mess with Clance...



Please note, the clip only contains the last part, which is a shame. But it was the best part.

One other thing. I'm doing writing for Gamerlimit.com and have knocked up an article about how FIFA stole my heart away from PES. If it sounds like your bag, check it out here

Much love to y'all...

OK, howdy, how are we all??? So the major news coming from the world of Playstation 3 and, more specifically, the PSN Store this week has been the release of Flower. But, to my utter dismay, the real BIG news of the week (at least here in Europe anyway) has been completely overlooked... It is, quite possibly, the greatest game OF ALL TIME!!!


WHAT a name for a game


That's right, my friends... Gather round and let me tell you this:

I downloaded the demo for this game (it's only just been released here, been out in the US of effin' A for a good two or three months) just because I was kind of bored. I had no idea what it was all about.

It's like football but you kick around the ball in rocket-powered cars!!!



OH HOLY COW!

I can't tell you how big and fun just that demo is. I've had hours of laughs and competitiveness with my flatmate on it over the last few days. Boy oh boy, some last ditch tackles made when you boost past your opponent and jump and do all kinds of craziness... Some great goals! Anger! Pain! Total joy!

I haven't bought it yet but I know that once I am drunk tomorow night, I'm gonna be all over it like peanut butter and jam. I mean, I love Flower but this? It should be illegal for being too much fun.

1) I’m from London. Highbury in North London, to be precise. I grew up on a council estate, leading to many cut knees, amazing water fights, 5 hour games of ‘Run-Outs’, ‘4 goals’ and a few embarrassing bicycle accidents that always seemed to happen in front of old ladies. Oh, and ‘Knock Down Ginger’ – re-named ‘Knock Down Ninja’ for my benefit.

2) Yes, I’m ginger. Not that big, bright orange that you get. No, I’m told I’m quite auburn but I don’t know much about that. It was difficult being a child with ginger hair. As I grow older I appreciate it more, realising that girls love it. All of them.

3) I’m a guitarist/singer (well, I “sing”), forming a band at the moment to make a bit more noise than the acoustic folky stuff I was doing for a while on my own. I want to be the British Josh Homme.

4) I’m trying to crack into the world of journalism; preferably games-related but I’m not overly fussed. I’m writing music stuff for a website (www.musosguide.com) at the moment. It’s voluntary, yes, but very nice when you get to hear new music, live or on record, and interview some exciting acts.



5) I love animals. I grew up owning old English sheepdogs (on a council estate! FTW!) and now, having flown the nest, own a couple of cats. I love my cats. They are allowed to sleep on my bed at night more often than they should be and quite often decide to bring presents in the form of pigeons, mice, worms and rats. Yummy! Saves me going to Tesco.

6) My girlfriend is an artist and I’ve learnt to love going to art galleries since we got together, nearly four years ago now. London is pretty blessed with some amazing galleries and fantastic art to fill them. I do feel lucky about that. It’s nice to have some culture in your life, which I was quite lacking before she came along!

7) I’m a massive Arsenal fan. My family own season tickets and I go whenever I get the chance, usually every month or two. I grew up about 5 minutes walk from the old stadium, with my primary school right next to it. I’m a football nut in general, often missing nights out just to stay in and watch Match Of The Day. I can also watch Sky Sports News all day on a Saturday.


Just above the Edwin Van der Sar's (goalkeeper) head you can see a patch of dark green. That's my jacket. I'm famous.

8) Oh, video games… Hmmm, yeah, well, I bloody well love them! I bought my PS3 in November 2007. Having felt quite left behind when the “next” generation came out (skint), I blew a shit load of cash on it and have never looked back. It has helped me become more passionate than ever about games. I never used to write about them like I do now but I grew up playing C64, Mega Drive and, of course, SNES. N64 was my first foray into video game independence (as opposed to using my older siblings’ ones). I took one look at Goldeneye at my friend’s house and knew I just had to have one for myself. I think my love for FPS games outweighs any other.



9) I love Converse. I’ve owned too many pairs in my lifetime. I am currently wearing a snazzy purple pair. Sexy.

10) My favourite footballer of all time wore the number 10 for Arsenal. His name is Dennis.

ZOMFGGGG! Can you MF’ing believe the video below!?! Amazing footage…. This is proooooof that Killzone 2 is in no way superior to Halo 3! In fact, it means that this game is a pile o’ ssssssshit! How can this game be a 93% metacritic when you can jump into nothing?? Hahahahaaaaaaaaaaa…. Sony is a JOKE!



Now, I don’t know why this person decided to try and play Mirror’s Edge on Killzone 2 and I don’t know why they posted it on Youtube. It could all be quite innocent to help out Guerilla and non-fanboy made but, either way, it is HUGE NEWS PEOPLE!!! Top of N4G!

I’ve been thinking about it and have decided that it just wreaks of two things:

1) People, like me, merely curious as to what this glitch is, hence helping this story the top spot.
2) Fanboys just so god damn eager to find fault with anything that they oppose. Clinging on to the hope that this game is terrible (or vicce-versa for the Sony breed).

Here are some quotes pulled from the comments:

"at least its not a glitch fest like Gears"

"And you know the complete game isnt glitchy how?"

"Why was it in black and white? Coudn't see any colors on screen."

"cry xboxfanboy cry.. KZ2 is just PERFECT!! game over to microsoft!! FACT!!!"

Why have things gotten this bad? It is completely embarrassing in so many ways and why the fuck (as someone pointed out in the comments) is the music in these videos always SO SHIT?

All I can say is: this

2004 feels like a long, long time ago. I failed to finish Killzone when I first picked it up for the PS2, getting slightly stuck midway through the game and (after about ten tries) kind of putting it on hold. Fast forward four years and I’ve (finally) revisited the game, playing it through my PS3 in order to be on top of what went on back then, before the sequel hits. I’m just that kind of guy. So, what did I make of it?

First of all, I’d like to point out that the game runs slightly worse through a PS3; the cutscene cinematics stutter over themselves, but are still easy to follow and some in-game things seem less polished. Or maybe I just have a selective memory.

To cut a long story short, you start off as Templar, a bad arse marine dude with fuzzy hair who is thrown into the conflict between the ISA and the Helghast. Conspiracies aplenty, the storyline is what you’d expect, while you never get the sense that a huge war is being waged around you. This is something of a let down. Things calm down and feel a lot more sparse after the first mission, which feels atmospheric and chaotic.

You encounter a few key battles as Templar before being joined by three others; Luger is a sharp shooting feline-figured woman wearing a balaclava and what looks like a Solid Eye device; Rico, a loud-mouthed knucklehead with a massive gun that he seems shy on using on anything with a pulse; and then, eventually, Hakha, a Helghan spy, working with the ISA.

From then on in you get to choose who you play with through each individual level, with each character having their own pros and cons. Billy Big Gun (that’s Rico to you) can blow the hell out of things but has no zoom; Templar and Hakha are two sides of the same coin, both well-balance; and Luger (who I used for most of the game – thanks for the tip Takeshi!) has a secondary fire on her custom weapon that sounds like a pea hitting a pillow and ends up being a one-shot kill much of the time. Plus, you have no limit on these, as long as the gun has main ammo.



As far as gameplay goes, Killzone is reasonably solid. Using different guns results in varied levels of recoil, with the standard ISA weapon suffering quite badly from it but packing quite a punch when on target and Luger’s silenced customised weapon having very little recoil but, as a down side, lots less ammo available. Secondary fire allows players to mix things up a little, with the Helghan machine gun doubling up as a shotgun while the ISA standard has a built-in grenade launcher.

Weapons vary but are grounded in some form of reality, ie. There are no plasma guns on show. You will often have to choose wisely about which guns to carry as you will only be allowed a maximum of three. This is particularly evident in one section, whereby you have a gun that pinpoints locations for air strikes (much like the binoculars in Warhawk) and the Helghast are rolling around in tanks. You must keep hold of this weapon but, with many others around on offer, do you accompany it with a shotgun, grenade launcher or Helghast assault rifle? It’s up to you but battles are won and lost on such decisions.



Friendly AI is pants. A friend of mine and I always pull a line from Shaun Of The Dead when attempting certain sections of Killzone: “Feel free to step in at ANY time!”. It’s like your buddies just pop the odd cap into the air for shits and giggles and are happy to watch exactly what you do, complimenting you on every kill you make. It can be frustrating, especially when paired up with the fact that enemy AI is pretty damn good. They hide from you just when you get them in your sights (even through a sniper scope) and are deadly accurate with their shooting.

Graphically the game looks quite dated, although cutscenes are pretty well made and the voice acting is spot-on - Brian Cox’s speech at the start (he plays Scolar Visari and is back for Killzone 2, yay!) is particularly immense – except for some in-game quotes that sound like they have been phoned-in. The general look of the Vekta is grey and dismal, which suits the theme of the game, although splash of colour is added when you hit the jungle and it gets a little sci-fi and spaceship-ish looking towards the end; a nice touch.

My main gripe about this game is the length. I must have been playing it for over 15 hours and, with levels getting slightly repetitive, it could have done with having five hours shaved off. The addition of a great multiplayer, on and offline/with or without bots (which are awesome), makes this even more plausible. But I would say, all in all, if you have the time before Killzone 2 hits, give it a go. Get acquainted with the Helghast before you are thrown in at the deep end at the end of February.

8/10, 'cause I said so.

Following XYU’s blog yesterday, regarding Christian Bale’s mammoth hissy fit on the set of the new Terminator film, I have come across (quite literally) this remix. RevoLucian is about to become a household name with what I believe to be one of the best tunes EVAAAAAR!



Can Batman come back after this? Are we really hunting him like at the end of the Dark Knight? I guess he made his bed and must lie in it. Oh, and for the people saying he was in character as he is actually Welsh or whatever…. Check out his interviews on Batman Begins’ extras, where he is speaking in an American accent - something he does to please his audience more I believe.

Personally, I don’t care what he is like as long as his films turn out OK. But I do hope he has learnt a few lessons from this and sorts his act out, for the sake of himself and the people trying to help him make movies.