my game is ass backwards.


You mother fuckers. I'm so glad I'm not the one who threw down 60 dollars or I'd be very upset. How long did it take to develop this game? Years? Well thank you Kojima, thank you for the fucking effort. What I get is a movie with a plot ripped out of the wachowski brothers asshole's that occasionally tells me to take a fucking step forward. Okay, I'm being harsh, I know, but before you ask, YES I PLAYED THE WHOLE THING. There is not something I'm "missing" I got the fucking point. Kojimas crack influenced idea of an "evolution in video game story telling" is just saying "Hey, I fucking ran out of gameplay ideas. Here's some shit you don't care about for 10 hours." No, I'm serious. If I would have skipped every cutscene, which regrettably I did not, the total amount of time actually playing would have accumulated to about Four Fucking Hours. I defecate you not.

I actually enjoyed the other installments of this series, I really did, for the most part, but holy shit did they drop the proverbial "ball" on this one. The game tries to trick you early on into thinking this is "tactical espionage" but it's bullshit. It's like a used car salesman saying "Hey, take this car and you'l get 8 vaginas, and a cup of coffee whenever the fuck you want." Then you drive it thinking you're johnny cool-cat and boom, a spring pokes you in the dick and it's then that suddenly you realize "Oh that salesman, that card, he pulled a fast one on me!" You see, in the early parts in the game, Kojima Productions tries to be innovative by having a non linear path, but usually this "innovation" falls into two options. "Take the way with enemies." or "Take the other way thats safe" Well shit, it seems I've reached a fucking conundrum!

You know that saying "fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."? Well, I'm sure you know where I'm going with this. The other two hours of MGS4 is played completely different from anything else in the series. I swear I thought I was playing a third person version of Call of Duty 4. Here, I'll try to play it out what was going on at Kojima Productions half way through development.

Dev: "Well, what's next?"
Kojima: "Shoot the fuck out of everything."

A tad unrealistic maybe, but I'm sure I was close.

Hey guys, it's been a while since I've had an actual blog post up and I got done with The World Ends With You a few days ago, so I thought I'd write up some impressions. Unfortunately, I'm not completely dead yet so I apologize for that. Enough bullshitting though. For those interested, enjoy your read.



Yes I realize I'm a little late on this, but give me a break. If you're feeling a little dried up from the overabundance of casual brain tests, and Pokemon collecting on your DS then you might want to try out The World Ends With You. The World Ends With You (Or TWEWY) is a very hip and stylish action RPG from the minds of Square Enix and Co-Developer Jupiter. (Holy shit they did Golden Sun)

Like many Square Enix titles, the story revolves around a teen with a heart full of angst, a mind diagnosed with amnesia, and too much hair gel. The story takes place in Shibuya, Japan which I didn't learn was real until a few days ago. Neku awakens in the middle of Shibuya with a pin that grants him the ability to see peoples thoughts. It turns out that Neku is playing The Reapers Game, a game that is privileged to the dead who have received Player Pins. Soon after awakening Neku meets another player named Shiki, a girl with a skirt that defies the laws of gravity and hip bones like spartan spears. As it turns out, the Reapers Game isn't friendly. The premise is to survive the week by completing a mission sent to your phone each day by the Game Master. (I'm not making this shit up.)



The way TWEWY is played is very unique, you and your partner are controlled on separate screens, but your health and the enemies you see are one in the same. The top half is controlled by using the d-pad, where your partner is stationed. Pressing left or right depending on which side the enemies are on will start a combo that branches off into three separate paths. There is a special technique that you and your partner will initiate for matching up cards or symbols (depending on your partner) but just tapping in one direction will score you the move eventually.

On the bottom, you control Neku using the stylus. This is where it gets to be frantic, yet fun. Depending on what pins you have equipped, you will have to do an array of different stylus motions to execute the psychs (moves). It can get hectic trying to remember the motions for the pins you have equipped, and trying to do the different combo branches to get that special move. Like I said, the enemies and your health bar are one in the same. Attacks you do on one screen damage the enemies on the other and attacks you receive on one character effects your health as a whole.

It's a very intuitive and fresh use of the dual screen functionality that the DS has and really puts your focus on using your abilities and team work to get through the challenges. One thing that really stood out for me is a character named Sho. This psychopathic boss has a tendency to build huge pieces of "Art" (which are just piles of trash and rubble) What he does on his free time is not the thing that makes him stand out from other generic characters though. What does is the fact that he is a mathmatician. Yes, a boss that kicks y our ass while shouting "sin, cosin, tangent." It was a truly great feeling to see such a unique character in this game.



There is a surprising amount of content in the game. If you have OCD and absolutley have to have every pin and clothing item in Shibuya, you have your work cut out for you. Many times you will feel like the end of the game is near only to be thrown back into your seat for another session. This is not a bad thing by any means, the game play is fun, the dialogue is witty and although the story gets a bit convoluted, you still are attached to the characters you're playing.

The World Ends With You brings a breathe of fresh air to the DS and you owe it to yourself to at least try the game if you're looking for something new. You might be like me and turn the volume off as soon as you hear the first lyric to an up beat J-pop song, but don't let one issue (which is totally to each his own situation.) change your mind about TWEWY as a whole.


For those of you who played the game, what are your opinions?

As you know, E3 is here and Microsoft's press conference is about to kick off the show in a couple of minutes. Then we will be treated to glimpses at new games and features. It really is Christmas in July, but remember when E3 was even more exciting? Remember when you got up to see the new announcements?

G4 does.



Remember this video? This is how I felt, and how I want to feel again.

BUT!

The conference is starting! bye!


JUST KIDDING, FUCK YEAR OH MY GOD, FINAL FANTASY 13?


SERIOUSLY?


HOOLLYYYY SHIITTT I LOVE E3

Since World of Warcraft hit the market back in 2004 developers have been trying to one up the mmo giant and get a hold of that sweet 10mil+ subscription paradise. One MMO in particular had me excited, and that was Warhammer Online: Age of Reckoning. I won't go too far into detail, but it seemed to bring forward a more engrossing pvp experience, distinct races and classes, and fun Realm vs Realm combat. But today, a sad announcement comes from Mark Jacobs, General Manager of Mythic.

"In short, the capital cities for the Dark Elf, High Elf, Orc, and Dwarf factions will not be in the game at launch. The Human city of Altdorf and the Chaos Inevitable City will be the only Capital cities in the game. This is an enormous change, seemingly changing much of what we know about the game's core of RvR gameplay.

Additionally, four classes are being removed, deemed to be in a condition unsuitable for launch. They are:

* The Choppa (Greenskin)
* The Hammerer (Dwarf)
* The Blackguard (Dark Elf)
* The Knight of the Blazing Sun (Empire)"

For the sake of quality over quantity I can understand, but removing such major features to meet a deadline you promised doesn't justify this. Why not just delay it again?
I have a feeling Mythic is just trying to push Warhammer out the door to compete with Wrath of the Lich King. Expect expansions releasing the removed content at a later date.


via mmorpg.com

Holy shit.

I am so fucking excited for this. Max Payne, and the sequel were amazing games for their time and I'm so happy that a movie is about to do it right. Well, for the most part. Mark W. doesn't exactly look like Max Payne, but he has the monologues right at least.
The only thing I can hope for in the movie is that those angels are dream sequences or some painkiller overdose. Also, I saw hints at Max's back story, which is fantastic that they are not leaving that out. (why would he freak out and kill people in the first place?)


Snow, guns, dead family, pain killers, it's all there and I'm hyped.







Fuck year.

Someone with a lot of time on their hands did gamers without a PS3 a favor by replaying MGS4, and recording every cutscene, and codec conversation. 9 hours total is the run time of this "movie"

Unfortunately, it's demonoid only at the moment, so if you do not have an account, you're out of luck.

So if you're a fan, and want to watch, grab it here.

http://www.demonoid.com/files/details/1520410/