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Far to looked over by the common shooter, i shall now debate the greatest punches in video game history.



10. Dead Space:The Isaac curb stomp.
It isn't just the lethality of the magnetically driven boot connecting a necromorph to the cold steel grate underneath it, its the reflex the game builds into you. Instinctively to make sure, after every kill, you'll shamelessly push the right bumper. Maybe not at first, but i don't have to be lied to twice, and in a horror game i always want to be safe rather than sorry.



9. Mario's standard jump.
A fat out of weight Italian plumber just jammed his size twelve doc marten through the shell of that turtle. If someone saw that thirty years ago they probably would have called the cops, now he gets a reward for some weird cosplay achievement.


8. Final Fantasy 8: Gunblade slash and fire
Your getting cut, and shot. In the exact same moment. Its as if someone took a bayonet and multiplied it by awesome.

7. World of Warcraft- the standard attack
It dosen't even matter if the attack connected with the opponent on screen, your digital dice roll said it did. Only in a MMO can hit box detection be accurate in "yards". Whether fighting a scorpion 5 feet below where you swung your blade, or a giant fel demon 10 stories tall, your avatar will do the same blind basic swing, and perhaps thats why the residents of Azeroth are so reliant on gear rather than skill.

6. Donky kong country- Diddy kong cartwheel.
Being beaten up by a gorilla classy enough to wear a necktie is one thing, but the limp chimp that follows suit and attacked you with a cheer-leading maneuver. Thats just plain badass.

5. Street Fighter 4- Sagat's Tiger Knee
I'm willing to be one hundred pesos that before you heard that bald cyclops scream TIGER KNEE for the first time you were not only unaware that tigers had knees, but that they would opt to use them over the god given claws and fangs.


4.Pokemon- Tail Whip
Almost any pokemon can learn it, and it is absolutely ridiculous. Say you came across one day in your strolls a bear, and as you assume the fetal position, expecting a lethal mauling, he smack you with his tail and walks away. Of course you would let your defenses down (foolishly) and then the bear could run back and maul you properly. In fact i think the only reason we don't hear about tail whips more often in bear attacks is because no one survives the aftermath, and that is why tail whip is epic.

3. Tekken- Yoshimitsu double suicide
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLVC7Guey8A
Not only is the move a giant F-U to anyone that happens to be standing behind yoshi on a day he forgot to take his anti-depressants but it also allows you to lose a fighter without the opponent even being involved, and that takes true skill.

2 super smash bros. Falcon Punch
Captain falcon is a race car driver, who somewhere along the way gained the ability to punch people with a bird composed of fire, wrapped around his fist. It's like if Jeff Gordon jumped out of his car, ran up to Earnhardt jr and yelled gordon punch, and thousands of endorsements flew out of his hand and knocked the driver right off the stage. And that image would be the most magical moment in Nascar history.


1.You- the Frustrated controller toss.
We've all done it, don't even say you haven't. Lost your temper third time that boss took you down? maybe you haven't won a halo match since the first one? I wont judge. But somewhere between Pac-man and the latest madden, the link between your game console and you was violently interrupted, perhaps even shattered on the floor. And that is the greatest melee move video games has shown us.

1. The Meatflag killed you, again. Bastard always gets the active reload and two pieces more than a 10 year old.
2. A ten year old killed you, again. Bastard always gets the active reload and probally two pieced you.
3. Your mother never loved you, she was probally to busy getting banged by your sixth grade history teacher to actually care if you just got ass sawed.
4. You just got ass sawed.
5. Everyone is your skin, there are like 20 to choose from and everyone is the black guy or a theron guard, thanks Jim.
6. Killing Cole makes you feel like a racist, because it feels so right.
7. You expect Marcus to tell you to kiss his shiny metal ass and he never does it.
8. You got World at War and Gears with all its failures is still a better game.
9. Some asshole shield glitched before you could, he probally rapes puppies.
10. Some asshole put grenade tags at spawn, before you could.
11. Some asshole put grenade tags at the grenade spawn killing you when you went for them to go grenade tag spawn.
12. Some asshole picked up Your grenades and you got stuck with his dropped smoke.
13. Your father never loved you, he was probally to busy wanking it to puppy rape videos to actually care if you just got hit with a mortar.
14. Someone actually had the thought to shoot a mortar at where you will be not where you are, he probally held the puppy down for the asshole that was shield glitching.
15. There are no vehicles for you to fully utilize your cheap bastardness in
16. You dont have host.
17. The guy with host was your sixth grade history teacher. He will quit the game cause he finally lost a shotgun fight.
18. You lost a shotgun fight, you probally dont have host.
19. You dodge rolled into those damn lasers on security.
20 You thought the shield would deflect the lasers ala Legend of Zelda mirror shield, guess it wasnt shiny enough.
21. You Suck.

Merry Chrismas Dtoiders, ill play with any of you in Gears 2.