Yes, it's true:



Is your father secretly a transvestite? Does grampy enjoy cross-dressing when he thinks no one's home? More importantly, have you caught them going about their trans-genderal debauchery?

If so, then you hold the bargaining chips necessary to land one or two new video games without even dipping into your own wallet. The stratagem suggested by Nintendo's N64 marketing team: blackmail. Of course. Really, why buy games with your own money when you can immorally -- and illegally -- coerce someone else into making the purchase? Works like a charm according to the boys who play with power.

So, if you don't have the money stacks for a PS3, snap some naked pictures of your colleagues and threaten to post them at work. Or, if you're having trouble getting ahold of such elusive material, just photoshop their faces onto Ashlynn Brookes' body and have at it. Gets the job done just as well.

Remember: as with any crime, you can shift culpability over to the video game industry once the lawsuit rolls in. After all, Nintendo told you to do it. Right?