Turn ons: Cursing, music from the '90s, sleeping
Turn offs: "Games as art," 4chan culture, wet socks
Favorite gaming genres: Beat-'em-ups, 2D fighters, turn-based/real time strategy games
Winners: Don't use drugs
America: Fuck yeah!
My personal Hall of Fame: Mega Man II, III, 9, and 10 (NES/XBLA)
Streets of Rage 2 (Genesis)
Contra + Super C (NES)
The Legend of Zelda + Link to the Past (NES/SNES)
Final Fantasy VI (SNES)
RBI Baseball (NES)
StarCraft I + II (PC)
Castle Crashers (XBLA)
Mass Effect Trilogy (360)
Street Fighter IV (360)
Tekken Tag Tournament 2 (360)
Dark Souls (360)
Congraturation this story is happy end. Thank you.
I don't have Photoshop on this computer, so the images are staying ridiculously large and blurry. Fuck it.
After thorough deliberation, the "Games As Art" Fancy Pants Award and free copy of Braid for the PC goes to...GamesAreArt (appropriate name)! Also, TheCleaningGuy and wanderingpixel! That's right, I'm going multiball on that ass, and three people are getting free games. I got a raise this week at work and I'm feeling extra generous, so here we go:
GamesAreArt won bonus points for the irony of his user name appearing in my contest, but also because of the extremely self-aware GameFAQs ode to Pong that I enjoyed. This sealed the deal:
"Flunchy’s final thought
This game accurately models mankind’s propensity to destroy itself. By showing humanity a mirror in which it’s ghastly reflection can be shone back at it, we are both horrified and attracted at the same time.
Or it could just be a case of “Hit ball for high score” – either way..."
7,980 words that made me want to avoid playing Shadow of the Colossus (or talking to someone who has played it). Well done, sir. As a former literature major who wrote his thesis on the history and cultural relevance of Japanese manga, I can relate to this writer's obsession.
This guy's not even halfway through his first sentence and he's making references to Wine Spectator magazine. Love it. Then he delves into a bit of pixel theory:
"Even if you argue that the pixel exists before it becomes a game, that pixel is still blank. I has not color, no shape and no purpose other than being a non-functioning bit."
He also wraps up his piece on a very Jim Sterling-esque note: "Certainly, games can be considered art on many levels and for many reasons."
See? Reasons, and many of them. That proves it once and for all, GAMES = ART. Start preparing your finest cheeses and filling your brandy snifters, folks! "Snifter" is a weird word, isn't it?
Congrats to you guys, I'll be sending those copies of Braid to you in like...5 minutes. And thanks to all of you who participated, commented, and fapped - 'cuz EVERYONE'S a winner with Destructoid!™
I leave you with these parting gifts for the holidays:
AHHHHHHHHHHHWHY ARE THOSE LAST TWO IN THEREAHHHHHHH!!!!