It wouldn’t be the start of a new year without baseless speculation, hopeless dreaming and unattainable goals. With 2011 all but forgotten already, it’s time to look forward towards the next 12 months and decide RIGHT NOW whether 2012 will be awesome or not. Since I can’t keep up with the “Bloggers Wanted” topics, I’m here to provide my own better hybrid. PREDICTIONS! ANTICIPATED GAMES! RESOLUTIONS!!


I’m an no fortune-teller. Hell, I have enough trouble deciding what I’ll be doing in the next five-minutes let alone knowing what will happen in five months!! Still, that doesn’t stop me from entering a hypno-toad trance and becoming one with the cosmos where I DEFINITELY can see the future. If I can make drunk girls believe that they’ll end up sleeping with me on that night, how hard can it be to convince gamers to believe I’m psychic? Let’s find out!! Oh and um...can you guys take a few shots before you start reading?? Thanks!

- Every single one of my resolutions, both of the personal and gamer variety, will fail

- Wii-U will be a hard sell for Nintendo; “hard” in that this is the last generation we buy physical games.

- Xbox Live and PlayStation Network will break down at the same time; there becomes so much impotent rage on the internet that fanboys literally start hunting each other down to stab each other in the face.

- The 3DS will be redesigned; 2 slider pads will be included, also in 4D.

- A Microsoft handheld!? Nope.

- OnLive will provide legitimate competition for Steam; LOLOLOLOLOrigin.

- Nintendo finally releases the timeline for Super Mario Brothers

- No new Legend of Zelda: Four Swords game will be announced; I’ll take this terrible oversight way too personally.

- Pikmin 4 will be announced, still no mention of Pikmin 3.

- The PlayStation 3 finally gets a game.

- Call of Duty and Battlefield will get drunk at a party and then totally make out together; they spend the rest of the year pretending they’re not gay for each other.

- Final Fantasy-branded (re)hash browns revitalize the Japanese breakfast industry

- The PlayStation Vita will get a Pokemon-like game in which you must collect all the kills by battling with weapons like guns, knives and grenades. It’ll be an FPS and actually nothing like Pokemon.

- Sega will be fire-bombed if they don’t release another Jet Grind Radio. More of a threat than a prediction.

- Shigeru Miyamoto‘s new game turns out to be horribly racist; despite the feelings of the Irish, people still consider it less offensive than Wii Music.

- Sonic the Hedgehog arrested on prostitution charges; his pimp, “Sonic Team”, is still at large

- After nearly a decade of speculation, the Phantom finally releases; now just an exclusive fart app on Android.

- I will run out of predictions

- HOLY SHIT THE LAST ONE WAS RIGHT!! :O


No matter how much I don’t want to accept it, we’re heading towards the end of this generation. With the Wii-U set to hit shelves later this year and the successor to both the 360 and PS3 expected to be revealed at some point over the next 12 months, developers are winding down development on the consoles we come to love over the last six years. Scary! It’s not over yet though and we still have many games to be excited for. Here are some of my most anticipated games for 2012:


With the innovative “Build & Battle” system that allows you to call down structures from the sky, this third person shooter-turned-tower defence game has long been on my radar. A spiritual successor to the reason I bought my PlayStation 3 in the first place, Warhawk, the game seamlessly combines troop warfare, vehicular combat and aerial dogfighting to create an action-packed experience. While there’s still much work needed, the beta for Starhawk assured me that this may be the only multiplayer shooter I need in 2012. Grab a jetpack and see why I love them.


The original Borderlands was one of those rare games which was much more addictive than it had any right being. It was almost as addictive as the drugs it seems to frequently reference (read this awesome cblog by nekobun for just how frequent). I’ve put in a couple hundred hours between the PC and PS3 versions, and I’m once again trying to convince my roommates to do another round of it. Borderlands had a ton of room for improvement but it’s synergistic quality just makes me salivate for the sequel. I cannot wait to play it!


Back in the day, vehicular combat games were my favourite type of games. While I didn’t play much from the Twisted Metal series since I never owned a PlayStation or PS2, I’ve sunk countless hours into games like San Fransisco Rush 2049, Vigilante 8, Toy Commander and Mario Kart. This generation has been severely lacking in the genre so the new Twisted Metal is high on my anticipation list. So far the game sounds like it may be a bit complicated but the gameplay itself should be solid. Much of the old Incognito Entertainment team has moved on to Eat Sleep Play and I enjoyed enough of Warhawk to give them the benefit of the doubt. With vehicles, mechs, helicopters, destructible environments and 4 player splitscreen, I hope this game findings a footing in online communities.


I can blame all of YOU for having this game on my list. Mass Effect is a series with critical acclaim...that I have yet to play yet. Wait, I’m not done!! People’s excitement for ME3 has rubbed off on me and has given me the desire to play through the first two games. So basically I’m anticipating playing this series. That counts, right? Actually the same could be said for Bioshock and Dead Space which I hope to play through at some time this year. Now I just need to decide if I should start this series before getting to Dark Souls.


Life is the ultimate RPG and we should always try to max out our stats. While I’m happy with who I am, there’s always room for improvement in various areas of my character. Pushing yourself outside your boundaries allows you to gain experience points in aspects that may be underdeveloped or rarely used, helping to flesh out your persona. Anyways, here are some ways I would like to grow as a gamer:

- Play more games!
I know I technically should be cutting back on my gaming time but I don’t play enough games for the amount of time I play. Too often I say I’ll be getting a game and then never do. I just need to start opening my wallet a bit and expand my library. I should probably try and get multiplayer games around the time they release too instead of waiting until everyone’s moved on already.

- Use voice chat!
You may have picked up on it already but I’m a pretty boring guy. I’m socially awkward at all times. It’s probably the main reason I never use a headset. Well when I’m back home it’s difficult to use chat since I tend to play at night when everyone goes to bed and blah blah blah blah blah. I say it all the time but I’ll try and use my headset more often. I’ll try and be less self-conscious and more outgoing, stepping outside my comfort zone. I guess It is also dependent on whether my roommates are playing or watching.

- Force myself to play single player games!
I know I should only play games I enjoy, or that’s what I say all the time anyways, but too often I give up on a game because I rather be playing in a multiplayer match. I can already feel it happening between Deadly Premonition and Reach. That adrenaline rush you get while competing against other people is like a drug to me. I don’t really get the same satisfaction beating up on bots, though it’ll be a good skill to have whenever the robot uprising happens. Even still, I want to play single player games from time to time. Mass Effect is probably the game I want to play most right now, and I still want to get into the Metal Gear Solid, Dead Space and Bioshock series. I haven’t forgotten about you either, Dark Souls!!

- Host some game nights!
This is another thing I say pretty often but I really do want to host more gaming nights. Friday nights are usually an inconvenient time for me to game, something I’m sure other Dtoiders feel the same way about. I’m not sure what games would attract a crowd but I think hosting it early on a weekday night/late evening could accommodate both East & West coasters. Unless everyone is going to be playing Team Fortress 2 on the Dtoid server because I’d be totally fine with that too!!

- Blog more!
While I’ve never been much of a blogger on here, or more importantly interesting, I feel like I should be contributing some sort of amusement for those who want something to read. I only published one blog all of last year which was just sad. I’m just saying it now though, I’m not paying for your psychiatrist bills when I eventually say too much and scar you mentally O__O

Have a great year, ‘toiders!!

*blows dust off blog*

*coughs*

*cracks knuckles*

Give me a second here while I remember how to do this ol’ bloggy-thingy....alright....chair’s comfy....glass is filled....candles are lit….aaaaaaand GO!!



If you’ve ever had the misfortune of reading my thoughts either here on Destructoid or out in the Twitterverse, you may have at one time come across the fact that I have a slight appreciation for the sport of hockey. Save the gasps for later, please. Being both a gamer and a hockey fan means that I am cursed with a terrible affliction where I give Electronic Arts $59.99 plus tax every year in exchange for an NHL game I basically bought the previous year. It is number 10 on my “Top 10 Disgraces as a Gamer” list. I’m not here to talk to you about my inadequacies at this time (I’ll save that for my ex-girlfriends HEY-O!...oh wait no), I’m here to tell you about how one of my most anticipated games this year and every year, NHL 12, has caused a bit of a conundrum for me.

The biggest gripe that most gamers have with sports games is that they see them as nothing more than “roster updates”, bringing minimal changes that wouldn’t require the full-priced purchase every year. Maybe they’re right in a sense, but over the last half-decade I feel that this would be particularly untrue of EA’s NHL franchise. Just like with the actual sport of hockey, some minor changes won’t be very noticeable but they may make a world of difference. NHL 12 is brimming with these small upgrades. So in lieu of an actual review (I did one for NHL 09, what the H-E-DOUBLE-HOCKEY-STICKS do you want more from me!?) I am going to break down what I liked from the game and what I found to be annoying. Since I’m a gamer and a sports fan, this is going to be nauseatingly overdramatic. Get ready for a LOVE/HATE Session!!



The first time you fire up NHL 12, you are dropped into a tutorial. While I found it hilarious that fighting is the first thing the game teaches you after you learn how to shoot (this HAD to be done on purpose to screw with mainstream hockey writers), the new faceoff mechanics you get taught dropped my jaw. Forehand and backhand grips, stick lifts, tie ups and draw dekes, this is a fully fleshed out faceoff system. Just like how the Leafs are discovering this year with David “Star Destroyer” Steckel, faceoffs are now more than just squaring up in the circle and whacking at the puck. It feels like skill and timing play a more important role. It’s not a huge deal but it does help to immerse you into the game and get the puck where or to who you want.



Speaking of immersion, the physics for the checking system in NHL 12 knocks you out of the moment worse than a stanchion to the face. EA upgraded the hitting mechanics and seemed to have left a few kinks in it. Players fall in the wrong direction, go down with injures from non-contact and….huh, what’s that? Yes this happens to more than just the Vancouver Canucks! It is game wide and not because the virtual players are trying to draw Shanabans! It doesn’t ruin the game, but it is pretty wonky and you will notice it. Same goes with the puck physics, where it’ll occasionally jump into hyper-drive across the rink. The game also suffers from the occasional freeze, and I’m not talking about the playing surface here. It’s most noticeable for me in Be A GM mode, where the game will get held up on the loading screen or stop in the middle of a match. Also, it’ll sometimes revert back to the default music even after I set the game to play a custom playlist. This is probably the first time in a long time that I don’t care for an EA soundtrack. It’s about as disappointing as the San Jose Sharks in the playoffs.



Sometimes you’ll play a game and see something so unexpected, something so realistic, that it just amazes you with what they can do in video games these days (LEAFS IN THE PLAYOFFS!?!?). NHL 12 is chalk full of these moments. In the first game I was playing, I skated up into the offensive zone and took a wrister that was blocked by the defender’s stick which exploded on contact, leaving me with a smirk on my face as I prepared to abuse this helpless player. Except that this did not happen! Before I could reach the loose puck, the defender dropped to a knee and batted the puck out of the zone with his hand. I didn’t even know they could do that!! I then paused the game and went to explain to my father the awesome display that I had just witnessed. He was not as excited as I was. In another game, I had been checked hard in the offensive zone. Not as bad as Stephane De Costa was hit by Neon Dion I might add. In the impact of the hit, I had dropped my stick and was racing to backcheck the opposing player empty-handed. That’s when I notice something poking out from my team’s bench. They were holding out a spare stick for me to use back on defense!! There seem to be countless amounts of these small details that just amaze me, stuff that makes me squeal with glee like Kyle Wellwood at an all-you-can-eat buffet.



NHL 12 is the “Jason Allison” of video games. What I mean by that is that yes, the game is very good, but it is just so goddamn slow!! Do you want to play a game? Gotta wait to load the match. Do you want to play Be A Pro Mode? Gotta wait to load your save. Do you want to edit your character?? Gotta wait to load the data. Do you want to play your next game?? Gotta wait to simulate to the date. Do you want to play a different mode?? Gotta wait to save. I’m not sure if it’s just the PlayStation 3 that it’s like this but the game is just so freaking slow and it gets to be pretty annoying after a while.



Some gamers dislike sports games because they’re “too real”, that there’s not enough fantasy or imagination to them. It should come to a shock to these people then that NHL 12 is actually a pretty deep role-playing game. SAY WHAT!? That’s right, you’re reality has been shattered like a Leafs fan’s hope for the playoffs in early November. Whether it is creating yourself in the game to play as, gaining experience to upgrade your character, unlocking new equipment or stat boosts via side tasks/missions, NHL 12 could best be described as what I’ll coin an RPS, a Role-Playing Sport game. You can even play as a past legend such as Stevie Yzerman, Borje Salming & Patrick Roy (yes, I thoroughly enjoyed researching this part). Then there is the EASHL24/7, a mode where you build your own team using hockey cards, earning pucks/currency from games. You can buy or trade cards, juggle lines for best chemistry, enter different tournaments, and play against either a live opponent or just go up against the CPU-controlled team. Then there is the team I created for Be A GM mode, using the now-defunct Thrashers jersey to recreate my school’s hockey team in the game (WLU Golden Hawks). The bright gold and purple can be a little obnoxious but I like it. I can even set custom music, either by song, artist or playlists, for specific events for my team such as for the intro and goals. And only in NHL 12 can the Ottawa Senators think that they are an actual NHL team. ROLE PLAYING, BITCHES!!



EASHL24/7 is one of the more interesting modes in NHL 12. The problem is that it needs to be connected to the EA Sports servers at ALL TIMES! Even if you’re just playing against a CPU-controlled team, whether it’s another user’s team or one of the opponents included in the game, you have to be online. The problem is that if you lose that connection for even just a split second, the game will boot you and you’ll be given a loss. Kind of like Montreal Canadiens fans and reality this year, a loss is always a given. This isn’t seen in the other modes, like online Be A Pro mode, just EASHL24/7 for some reason. I could be up 7-0 at the start of the 2nd period and end up with a loss. It’s pretty annoying and a mode I won’t play anymore until I get better internet (that’s the Toronto FC fan in me speaking up). I’m not going to turn this into a rant about Rogers or Bell (yeah….I had to delete a few paragraphs here), but satellite internet is killing me! Plus if someone uses the wireless phone in the house then we get kicked off the internet because apparently we have dial-up again. It is just one of the many reasons why I’ve been missing out on Friday Night Fights lately. So my team, the Inuvik Deltas, shall be temporarily under suspended operations for the time being.



One of the less talked about, but pretty awesome, selling points for the game is that you can create women in NHL 12. The story goes that a 14 year old girl named Lexi Peters wrote a letter to EA asking for female players to be included in the game but she was told it wasn’t possible. Then EA thought about it and realized they would be able to do it for Be A Pro mode, though why they can’t at least include women’s national teams is beyond me. While it shouldn’t be that celebrated since NHL Hitz allowed you to do this a decade ago, and the Sedin twins have been in the league for years, it is smart that EA is improving the game to be more accommodating to more people. Being able to put yourself into a game really helps to immerse you into it so it must suck not being able to do that. Your move, first-person shooters!



Yeah, you know how I just mentioned that you can create female skaters?? Well it comes as a huge disappointment then that you can only use two models, a brunette (made after Lexi) or a blonde (modeled after a girl who looks like the one from Radio Free Roscoe but with braids). Outside of height and weight, the only real customization you have is the eye colour. I’m sure there are non-white women that would like to play hockey. Hell, EA even neglected to include red heads!! Those bastards!! I really don’t know what their development team was thinking. As a whole, the entire character customization could use a bit of an improvement, even for men. That old feature where you could upload pictures of yourself to use in game never really took off after the start of this generation. In the end I was able to create Amanda Kessel, younger sister to the NHL leading scorer Phil “The Thrill” Kessel, so she is my new sniper. If only she could have been made a red head…..



If you haven’t noticed from me talking yet, NHL 12 is filled to the brim with different modes with each one being different enough that you’ll one to invest time into them. EASHL24/7 would probably be my favourite mode if I could play it since it ties online play with team-building. Be A Pro mode is pretty fun and intense online, where you can either be the hero or the goat for your team. Since the easiest way to level up is by winning, you really have to swallow your pride and do what’s best for the team such as making the pass instead of trying to score all on your own. Also, just back out if you have a player-controlled goalie on your team. Chances are you’ll be playing with Vesa Toskala and he’s just as bad in video games as he is in real life. Then there is Be A GM mode where you build your team and perform task while trying to ensure both your NHL and AHL-affiliate win. Completing one week within this mode instantly makes you more qualified for an actual NHL GM job than John Ferguson Jr. I remember in past years when this was entirely a simulation mode so it’s nice that you can actually play as your team now.



As much as I love all of these modes, the time required to invest into them is huge! The biggest problem is that I haven’t found a way to shorten the season other than by just simulating games or playing as the Columbus Bluejackets. Each season is 82 games long, on top of a few preseason games, and playoff games if you make it. Playoffs are a best of 7 series, four rounds long (*insert your own Leafs joke here*). Many of the requirements to unlock new stat boosts are to play upwards of 3 seasons with a Be A Pro character, some of which must be done as a specific player type (sniper, power forward, playmaker, defensive defenseman, two way defenseman, etc.). NHL 12 is a game designed for people like my cousin, a person who enjoys the occasional video game but lives and breathes hockey. I’m pretty good at video games but I’ve only managed to beat him THREE TIMES at NHL over the last four years! I’m actually pretty decent despite what my record says about me, something I’m sure Jonas Gustavsson would relate with. It’s a fun game, don’t get me wrong, but I also like to play other games on top of actually watching the sport. So yes, I am hating on the game because it is too awesome.



It’s hockey ^__^

Today is a release of a very special game. “Special” in the sense that I’m actually willing to pay full price for it and buy it at launch. This game I speak of is not Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood, though I am interested in the multiplayer. It is none other than Electronic Arts’ Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit. I am very excited for this game. Actually “excited” probably doesn’t do justice for what I feel. Drawing inspiration from mrandydixon, I have at least five boners for this game. At once. Anyways what better way to celebrate the release of Hot Pursuit than share why I am psyched for this game.



1) It is made by Criterion Games.



There is an exclusive club of developers that literally can do no wrong in the eyes of their fans. One of the developers that falls in this category so happens to be Criterion and they are fully deserving of this honour. Makers of the critically-acclaimed Burnnout franchise, EA gave them the task of rebuilding their flagship racer back to its former glory. So far so good as the game has amassed a 90% rating on Metacritic for the PS3 version. Our very own Nick “wait this isn’t Rock Band” Chester gave the game 9.5 out of 10, Editor’s Choice Award. Of course the review felt a little off due to the lack of serious butthurt in the comments section but we can excuse Nick this time.


1.5) I really, really liked Criterion’s last game, Burnout Paradise.



Sure it may look terrible, partly due to being unfinished and partly due to the crappiness of glue sticks, but it was something I needed to put up on my wall. The boxart for Burnout Paradise is one of my favourites of all time. I always wanted a poster of it but could never find one anywhere so I just made my own. I often use the bike version, with inverted colours to give a midnight look, as my laptop’s background. This is a game that I love dearly. Whether it was the competitive racing or cooperative Free Burning, this was a game where you could go from relaxed to hell-possessed on the turn of a dime. It was beautiful, it was fun and it kept you busy for hours. On top of that, Criterion was doing what was unheard of at the time and releasing post-release content for free! New free burn and timed challenges, day and night cycles, crotch-rockets, trophies (remember when that was an issue??), new features....all for free! Eventually they did start providing paid content, though while a little pricey, was definitely worth the cost of admission for fans. Big Surf Island is still one of the best pieces of DLC on the market. This was a developer who knew how to do things right.


2) Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit has gone back to its roots.



Need For Speed hit it big with the Underground series. These were the games that really brought the racing franchise to the mainstream. While I had fallen out of the loop long ago, it seemed as if the games were becoming bland, though Shift was another step in the right direction. Now it’s looking like there will be a second step as well. For me, Need For Speed was remembered for Hot Pursuit and High Stakes back on the computer long ago. Already the updated game sounds like it does the name proud.



Bringing back Racers and Coppers, one team races while the other cops. You know what I mean. As a racer, you most compete with other drivers to post the fastest time. As a cop, it is your job to make sure that those “street-punks” are shutdown and thrown in the slammer. Further pushing the game into the much-adored realm of “arcade racer” is the use of items by both sides. The cops can employ such weapons as spike strips, road blocks, EMPs and helicopters. The racers get an assortment of offensive and defensive weapons like the radar jammer, turbo, spike strips and EMPs.


3) Hot Pursuit is doing everything it can to one-up Burnout Paradise.



Well this could go without saying. It would be expected that Criterion would want to make their new game better than what they previously developed so it really isn’t that big of a surprise. But let’s humour me so we can move on in this article. Seacrest County, the location that all this street racing occurs, is massive. Paradise City was a pretty big metropolis so it is both amazing and intimidating to hear that Seacrest County is at least 4x bigger. While it doesn’t have the density of city roads, the locations in Hot Pursuit appear to be much more varied. There is the Mediterranean coast, the outback desert, evergreen forest and whitecapped mountains. Each area looks distinct enough from one another.

Also unlike Burnout is the presence of real-life cars. No more empty stares from people as you forget that a Hummer is not called Hunter Olympus. These are exotic-brand vehicles that you will be driving and crashing. Lamborghini, Porsche, BMW, Austin Martin, Maserati....many of the vehicles I get boners thinking about. While I am more than a little disappointed with the lack of a Toyota Celica in the mix, I think I can live with using cars several leagues out of my tax bracket.

If that wasn’t enough for Criterion to top its older games, in comes Autolog to wreck everything I loved about Road Rules.


4) Road Rules + Facebook = Autolog



If you have me as a friend on the PS3 and own Burnout Paradise, chances are you have called me a dick on more than one occasion. Switch over to the bikes and the insults get dramatically nastier. Earlier this year I completed my goal of becoming “The Mayor of Paradise City”. By that I mean I turned every street sign gold on the bikes and owned the majority with the cars, all with a friends list over 60 at the time. This is Road Rules, a seamless leaderboard system that compared times of all your online friends. Owning one record on a road gave you a silver sign. Own them both and you get the highly coveted gold sign. Criterion seems to have fleshed out this idea to another level.



Autolog is the new leaderboard system used in Hot Pursuit. It seems to be a bit of a mash-up between Road Rules and Facebook, meaning that there is increased competition with more social capabilities. Whereas on Burnout you could on see who owned the Road Rule and had to dig a bit deeper to find out who was also faster than you, here in Hot Pursuit it is laid out in plain view when you are NOT in first. It looks to give you motivation to not just get 1st Place but to also beat the person directly above you with a faster time. You can view it online on your PC as well at the Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit website.



I consider it a Facebook-hybrid because of the presence of a wall. As you can see, not only are race times posted but you can also leave messages for people. In this case, I am giving my trash-talking muscle some warm up.



The game also recommends times for you to beat and your time for others to beat. What this does is put a big bulls-eye on your back, essentially calling out the manhood of everybody and their mothers who can’t beat their time. Up above is an example from linuxguy whose time I’m being challenged with.

5) As a pretty competitive person, sometimes people just give me a reason to get pumped up.



Isn’t that right, Talia?? Also, I used New Dtoid. Suck it haters! :P


If what I wrote at all got you excited for the game, great!! I really do need more people to beat! Daxelman, I know you're a BP fanatic! If Criterion showed us anything with Burnout Paradise it is that they will continue to show their game some love long after its released. The game is lacking the coop-friendly Free Burn from Paradise City and it is something I would love to see transferred over to Seacrest County. Also bikes! OH GAWD DO I NEED BIKES!! I wouldn’t be surprised to see vehicles in paid DLC for sure.

And now, I must head to the store and pick up a copy.....

*checks school schedule for next two weeks*



FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

*sigh* Just a little stressed. I’ll live. Probably.

I am a very frugal person.

It is not often that I just spend my cash all willy-nilly. With a hobby such as video games, this means that I may miss out on some games. Uncharted 2, Bioshock, God of War 3, Metal Gear Solid 4, Call of Duty, Bad Company 2, Grand Theft Auto IV....all examples of games I want to play but just haven’t separated myself from my cash yet. It’s so bad that the last PlayStation 3 game I purchased was MAG back in March. And the PS3 is my main gaming console!! And yes, I am still a gamer. I can wait for games to come down in price before I buy them though usually by that point I’m no longer in a hurry to play them. Except for NHL, EA gets all my money.

Now that September has rolled along I am back at school, again (*sigh*), with a crapload of time. It’s what happens when you switch from biochemistry to geography I guess. Like last year, I have once again brought up my PS3 with me. The problem that my three roommates and I have run into is that with only two controllers, there is very few games that we can all play together at once. Over the weekend, the demo of Worms seemed to be the answer to our problems.


If your landlord leaves you an HDTV like this, you're basically required by law to hook up a PS3 to it.

Now I’ve had the demo for a while. I downloaded it last school year at sometime but we didn’t really stick with it. But we got hooked on it over the weekend for some reason. Well, the reason being "fun" I guess. Even our new non-gamer roommate was having a blast. So on Monday night I decided to go out and buy a PSN Card to get the full version. We desperately needed the ability to play with 4 players.

Something wasn’t sitting right with me though. While I wanted to buy Worms, there was a voice in the back of my head telling me to wait. I had a sneaking suspicion that maybe Worms would be featured on PlayStation Plus and that I should subscribe to the service. So I hit up the internet in search of what Tuesday’s update would bring. Unfortunately I couldn’t find anything. Then I thought to myself, “Hmm, isn’t there a new Worms game coming out sometime this year?? Naw probably not.” So I head upstairs, add funds to my virtual wallet and get downloading the $12.99 plus tax Worms.


Just a little vanilla.

The more we played the game, the more disappointed we became. We knew there was only 23 weapons but we figured it wouldn’t matter too much. My one roommate and I are both veterans of the Worms franchise so we kept pointing out missing things. “Where are the longer girders??” “No custom maps??” “If only I had a parachute!” “Oh we can’t set the number of worms per team??” While we were nitpicking, we were still having a blast, literally, and enjoying ourselves. Staying up till 3am on the first night of school when we had morning classes the next day was not a responsible start to the school year.

The next day we were getting pretty pumped for some more carnage. The lead up to our night-time death match was filled with bouts of smack-talk and ideas for new game types. As I sat down to eat dinner, I remembered that with it being Tuesday the PlayStation Blog would have a list of the week’s PSN update. Oh how angry I would become....


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Worms 2: Armageddon!?!? What!? Not even 24 hours after I bought Worms, the sequel was released. At $14.99, it was like some sick, twisted joke being played on me. Perfect Worms’ humour actually. Being caught completely off-guard, I go in search of answers. Did it deserve my money?? Just looking at the reviews for the 360 version, which was released months earlier, showed that it was everything I wanted Worms to be and more. While I was planning on spending my remaining funds on Castle Crashers, 4-player hot-seat play took priority. Plus I mean it’s Worms. C’mon!!


Definitely has much more visual pop to it than its prequel.

After finishing the download, and being laughed at by my roommates, we booted the game up and continued on with our grudge match. Instantly we saw in improvement with almost every one of our gripes. While the entirety of Worms felt like a demo, Worms 2 feels like the definitive version. Everything from the presentation, to the weapons arsenal to just the personality, it felt like the Worms I know and love. The game made me laugh and not just in the situations we created for ourselves. Between the worms’ silly costumes, their accents and trash talk, and especially their high pitched screams after you drop a stick of dynamite on their heads, this game never ceases to put a smile on your face.

Of course, I haven’t owned the game for 24 hours but I can already tell that there is a ton more to do in the game. There are more modes to play, more single-player missions and many things to unlock. The online mode even has full voice-chat support though I haven’t tested it yet. Worms 2: Armageddon also has a Platinum Trophy, which not many PSN games have, though it won’t come easy.


Anti-air defence at its finest.

So should you be buying Worms 2: Armageddon?? If you are a fan of Worms, strategy games, 4-player couch play, or just general fun, then yes you should purchase this game. This is my favourite version of Worms since Worms Armageddon on my Dreamcast. While I resent the fact that I wasted almost $15 on a game I probably won’t ever touch again, Worms 2 more than makes up for it. This will definitely be in heavy rotation over the coming months. The only way I could be disappointed with this game is if they were to release Worms 3: Armageddon next Tuesday.

Sony and Team 17, for the sake of my sanity and my wallet, please PLEASE don’t.

Dear America,
please take back this hot, humid air mass. My supple Canadian body cannot tolerate this sticky 42 degree Celsius weather. Not cool. Literally. I have to play ultimate frisbee later today and I will definitely die. Let’s knock out one last blog before I croak.

Impression time starts now. And I apologize in advanced for the image quality. My cellphone's camera was all I could find at the time.


Updated PS3 Photo Gallery



Impressions of an image viewer?? Really?? Sure why not.

Originally there was no picture gallery on the PS3. There was the photo column on the XMB which to me was more than adequate for viewing images. I mostly just have different backgrounds saved on my harddrive so I always found it functional enough. Apparently Sony did not. Trying to capture some of the Wii’s magic, since an image gallery was clearly the difference between the two consoles, they went about and created the Photo Gallery. It gave the user the ability to make fancy slideshows and that was literally it.

For some reason though, Sony decided to keep putting resources into the Gallery and the results are something that actually impressed me. Seriously. The recent update brought along [url=www.facebook.com]Facebook[/url] and [url=www.picasaweb.google.com/ ]Picasa[/url] integration. Of course this update is practically meaningless if you do not have an account for either of the two but it will be cool for those that do. Ok maybe not cool but convenient nonetheless. That’s the word I’m looking for.



There are three tabs to the Photo Gallery: your images saved to your PS3 (left tab), your slideshow playlists (middle tab) and your PSN photos (right tab). The image above is from the PSN tab. After logging into your Facebook and Picasa accounts, icons appear showing your photo albums. The pile of photos directly above my PSN avatar are my Facebook photo albums; above the Facebook icon are the photo albums of my friends.



The problem with looking at your friends’ Facebook photos on here is that they will come up in any order your PS3 chooses. I have 91 friends. It is annoying at worst for me. For people that have 300, 400, over 1000 friends....well you will be swimming through a lot of names. There is no search engine either so you better be hoping your internet is speedy. A nice touch though is the “new” icon which notifies you who recently added photos.



As for image quality, the Photo Gallery works amazingly well. That’s right, the PS3 with all its Cell Processors and Blu-Rays displays still pictures really well on my HDTV. No stretching or blurring and whatnot. Does what it’s supposed to do.

And yes, that is me.



On the PSN tab, your Picasa web albums are found under the lower of the two icons. It took me awhile to figure out that the top icon was for your Picasa friends. Since I do not have Picasa friends, I used one of my alt accounts to friend myself. I know, lame. What is interesting about this page though is that there is a “Featured Photo” icon and a search icon. The featured photos are those chosen by the Picasa development team. Essentially, they are “promoted” pictures. They’re your typical artsy-fartsy type of photos though they do look pretty. The search icon on the other hand lets you search shared photos on the Picasa network. I decided to see what “dtoid” would pop up. A little disappointing is that you can only have one search topic at a time. Looking up something else will get rid of your last item.



These are photos that have been tagged dtoid. I doubt that these are all of them but it did not give me an option to search more or anything. Also looking closer....



ZOMG!! I found Hamza and Samit!! Garison is lurking in the background too!! I feel like such an internet lurker now. I was going to leave a comment but I couldn’t find a way to see whose photo it was. Even worse is the fact that the only way you can add Picasa friends is through the website. I couldn’t do it on my PS3. Bummer.



The thing I’m probably most disappointed with the Photo Gallery is that Sony was saying that you could share photos with your PSN friends, which of course turned out more cumbersome than it needed to be. To let your PSN friends view your photos, you must select an album and manually share it. A PSN message will pop up allowing you to select who you want to send it to.



The album will appear at the bottom of the PSN tab. I’m not sure if it specifies which photos were from whom but with only one person, there is no name to differentiate. I’m not sure what happens when multiple people send you albums, if it just goes by album name or what. If you have multiple albums you want to share you must send them out individually.



Something that gives me hope is the empty space to the left of the Facebook icons. The PSN tab was clearly made three icons wide but only two columns are being used. I’m assuming/hoping that sharing among PSN friends is the next logical step. Right now the easiest way to share with everyone is to become Picasa friends and that is just annoying to do. Also spamming your friends list with albums probably isn’t much better.



Commenting on photos is pretty easy. Just hit R3 and type away. Though watch what you say because only the owner of the photo can delete comments. Now that I remember, you can’t save Facebook or Picasa pics to your PS3, nor turn them into wallpapers. Kind of a letdown though I’m sure that is more because of privacy issues or something. Also you need a Picasa account to comment on Picasa pics and a Facebook account to comment on Facebook pics. Otherwise you sit there typing a well thought out comment only for it to vanish into nothingness. Yeah, it’s why I made the alt account to begin with.



Since I haven’t mentioned it yet, you can upload photos from your PS3 to both your Picasa and Facebook accounts. It works likes you’d expect, which means great. You even get the added “nerd cred” on Facebook as it states that it was “uploaded via PlayStation Network”. Sweet.

So is the new Photo Gallery worth your time?? If you have either Facebook or Picasa, or both, then definitely. It’s not something that you’ll be loading up every night but it does give you a different way to lurk and share photos. It is much easier to crowd around the tv then the computer if you want to show off pics from your latest trip with house guests. While I have a few complaints, it doesn’t seem like Sony will be stopping here. Anyways, it’s free. WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT!?!?


PSN Facebook Application



Yes, I’m talking about more Facebook. Deal with it.

Along with the firmware update and Photo Gallery update, Sony also finally released an app on Facebook to post your PSN ID. It’s pretty bare bones though. It contains your PSN name, your trophy count and level, and the list of games you have earned trophies in.

For some reason, you cannot actually see trophies for specific games. You just get the overview. I thought it was supposed to show the PSN ID of my Facebook friends, though it could be because none of my friends have it to begin with. Oh well.

Not really much more to say. Is it worth a download?? No probably not. It has little functionality other than stating your name. If you like me have been wanting a way to put your PSN ID on your Facebook page though, then you probably already have this. If not, it’s your call.

Also, this is the first Facebook application I’ve ever downloaded. I held out for so long but couldn’t resist.

Also, also, I was planning on including my Medal of Honor beta impressions here but it was making this blog way too long. Since you are never supposed to serve the main course first, nor dessert, I’ll post it in a day or two. Hope you still have an appetite then.

CLIFFHANGER!! DRAMA!! SUSPENSE!!

And I made it through an entire blog without mentioning PlayStation Home once.....oh DAMMIT!!

A million internet-years ago, I wrote a picture blog chronicling my adventures in PlayStation Home. I had part deux lined up but never got around to actually writing it. Chalk it up to laziness or some sickly disease. Well after getting frustrated trying to write several other blogs recently, I decided to go back to my specialty no matter how sad that specialty is.

Last time I gave you guys a tour of my apartment, we went shopping at the Mall, took a stroll through the Central Plaza and went to catch a flick at the Theatre. This time we'll check out some developer spaces. First up is from one of my favourite games this generation.



Warhawk



The Warhawk space has the same gritty, military aesthetics the game is known for. Taking place in a bunker, this space is primarily for 'Hawkers as it's intentions seem to be more on educating users than selling itself to idiots who don't already own the game. If you were offended just now, you totally deserved it.




Practice makes perfect. For people like me, that means a whole lot of practicing to become competent first. These computer displays hold sensitive intel that can help a person to become a better, more dangerous fighter. This was the thing that made me realize that Home was more than just an online dancing simulator. "You mean I can actually dodge missiles in open air while using Pro Flight controls!?"

My mind was blown.




While Sony recently released a Warhawk Apartment for users to buy, something I have sadly/happily not bought yet, these awesome holographs of the flying raptors are unfortunately not part of the deal. More on the Warhawk apartment can be found in my past blog.




The thing I don't understand about Warhawk is that I love the look of the actual Eucadian Warhawk much more than the Chernovan Nemesis, but for some reason I play much better in the "soaring stingray". Maybe it's because I spend less time looking at my own ship and instead watch what others are doing. I needed the pic of the deadly duo together.




Now for what I consider to be the main draw of this space: the Warhawk Sandtables. Basically you could pretend to be a military general, looking over the battlefield and devise strategies for victory. I really don't know how effective it is. I find them hard to use which isn't helped by the often unpredictable nature of the game. This table is included when you buy the Warhawk apartment by the way.




Some freaky zombie wanted me, presumably in her pants. I'm not sure if she was after me because of my good looks or for my brain but I tend to have that affect on women. If I had a weapon I could dispose of this zombie. Yes, I classify zombification as an STD, especially when contracted from a female host.




This place is metal as fuck. I just had to rock out.




Ooooooh what do we have here?? Flamethrower?? RPG?? Grenades?? Assault rifles??




OH GOD LET ME IN!!! I CAN BURN THEM ALL!!! EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM!!!



Resistance 2



From the tingling sensation in my fingers, my standing hairs and the burn marks on my back, I think the bunker guards at the Warhawk Space tazed me and threw me out on my ass. So where do I go when one of my favourite games rejects me (and it wouldn't be the first time Warhawk did that to me either)?? Well I go to another of my favourite shooters. Here I am, Resistance 2!!

And yes, I am the annoying neighbour in the world of Home.

There's really not much to do in this space. It's an advertisement. There's video screens playing the trailer from the game and posters scattered around.




This thing you see I'm angry at is something I had a mild addiction to. It is a turret mini-game where you have to shoot Chimeran ships out of the air. If you get a high enough score you unlock a shirt with the SRPA logo on it. The thing I'm upset about is that for some reason the logo on my shirt disappeared and now I just have a plain white shirt. Balls.




The blank sign above the ticket booths shows the scores from the turret game. Like I said back in October, the screenshot tool doesn't capture things on video boards. If the results have not changed since 7 months ago, I have the highest score on my friends list. I also have no reason to believe those results have changed either.




Dear America, this Canuck tried to protect your homeland from the alien invasion and failed. I think. I really don't know, the end of R2 was pretty confusing. Seeing Hale that happy at the end gave me nightmares though.




"Brain eating zombies from space." That really is terrifying. Someone from this space needs to fax over that poster to those Warhawk bastards and tell them to share that flamethrower with me. For defensive purposes. Nothing else.




This here is the special meeting place of the SRPA. I wasn't allowed in there. The Resistance people are bastards too it seems. They at least let me pose for a picture in front of their door. Ok, they may have specifically told me to NOT take a picture of it but they didn't have to be so rough when they escorted me off the premises afterwards.



Pixeljunk



I figured you guys were getting tired of the dark greys and browns of the shooter worlds so I went to a place more stimulating for your optics: the Pixeljunk space!! The video screen was showing gameplay from Shooter. This space is definitely what I would consider to be an advertisement space, but it's been crafted so well that it is worth just seeing the design for yourself. The colour really pop in here.




The first section of the PJ space is Racers. Seeing their cars crafted in such detail makes me wish that they didn't make this game just a top-down racer.




Yeah bro, this is SO going to be my new Facebook profile pic. All the lay-deez will be beggin' for moi after seein' me wit deez large-ass rimz.

I actually have a friend who talks like that.




What the hell is this!? A racetrack for ants!? It has to be two...maybe three times bigger!!




Next up was Monsters, the one PSN game that I don't understand how I have yet to purchase. I definitely need to make amends soon!




This space is comprised of life-sized models of the towers that defend in the game. I really had no clue what they did. On the back wall were screenshots and videos from the game.




WHAT THE HELL!? I swear guys it's not what it looks like!! I...I...I'm really strapped for cash. This heroin addiction costs a lot *sob*.




Eden follows up in the rotation.




Like the game, I was thoroughly disappointed with this space. It looks cool but once you get to the back of the annoying glass "maze", all you are rewarded with is the chance to sit down on some uncomfortable chairs and sexual harassment. The music is good though.




Here is the shop where you can spend your money. My fists were clinching wads of cash but no sales clerk was present to take my money. Just joking, I'm poor and have no money. You just walk up and pay anyways. They do have some cool shirts for your Home persona on the cheap. Even the entire biohazard suits from the scientists you rescue in Shooter.




I am so awesome that Q Games dubbed me "King of Pixeljunk". Bow to me, peons!!




Like I was stating before, the aesthetic of this space are really well done. This is the type of architecture that Home needs, which the developers do seem to be now embracing.




Men at work. Why do my arms look so scrawny??




The Pixeljunk Crown!! I spent a good 15 minutes trying to take this pic because some douche wouldn't move out of the way. I eventually won out after he got bored and left. HA! I used to use this pic as my background on my laptop. It looks very good. Too much white ruins it as a PS3 background though.




Now originally when I took these photos 7 months ago, the Shooter space was not finished. But revisiting the space I found the finished product. Here it is. I have to say I love the look. And where exactly does that elevator go?? Well.....




TO FREAKIN' OUTER-SPACE!! I was clearly excited at seeing the sun that close up. I'm also now blind and have an advanced form of cancer. It was worth it though.




The personal spaceships from Shooter are also here. They are much bigger than what they seem like in the game. Some of those caverns must be huge in scale. Also, I call dibs on the green one!!




Admiral CelicaCrazed declares war on your homeworld. Doom is inevitable.




There is literally nothing to do is this subspace but I was still impressed nonetheless.



Ratchet & Clank



I decided space elevators were not as cool as space ships, so I hijacked one and crash landed into what turned out to be the Ratchet & Clank space. The hobo that claimed it after I got out will just have to take the fall for me I guess.




This space is designed mostly for entertainment it seems. The developers know what Home users like and even installed a disco ball in one of the corners. I try to get my groove on but fail miserably.




Underneath the centre stage is what seems to be a manufacturing line. They seem to be constructing crates to replace the ones Ratchet is so fond of breaking. That dude has some serious issues.




Here we have an overlook of the space. Behind me are videos from the game. Along the back wall where I'm facing are some holographs that give information on the weapons, gadgets and ammo from the Ratchet & Clank series. I don't really know what that tube on the right is for. Maybe for leaving to the Central Plaza or maybe to another subspace. We may never know.




This fellow here sends you on a search to find his lost sheep. You get a prize for finding them all. Alright I'll tell you what it is. It is a miniature space ship to decorate your apartment. There's a picture later on that will show it.




Finally we have the mini-game that mixes tower defence and turret shooting together. Seven months ago I had no clue what it actually was because there was so many people playing it and I didn't feel like waiting for a turn. Stupid instances. Now there is no one here. Well I'm in the future zone, which is the hardest zone and requires the second of two unlockings (Present is easiest with past the middle difficulty). It was also like 2 in the morning on a weekday night. Yay unemployment! The controls are somewhat annoying because up and down are inverted, but if you are used to that scheme you shouldn't have too much trouble. The coolest thing is that you can play with three other people. You also get a prize for beating the Future stage. This prize you'll have to earn yourself if you want to see it but it may be hidden in a future pic.

Alright let's move on!



EA Sports Poker Complex



Oh no! It's evil sports!! Yeah this place may scare away most gamers but EA has me in their back pocket. I find it funny that they are still using Blanco in a Chicago Fire jersey to advertise FIFA 09 when he doesn't even play in this league anymore. Major League Soccer if you wanted to know what I league I meant (Woo! TFC!).




This space has images and videos from different EA Sports games. When I went back in October, they should have been advertising the 2010 games but whatever. NHL 09 had Dion Phanuef on the cover who will definitely be named as the captain of my Toronto Maple Leafs so I'm not complaining. Seriously Calgary, what were you thinking?? AHAHA!!!




I personally think it's crazy to build so many sports fields/rinks/courts/rings on top of high-rise buildings but that's just me. Someone with an engineering degree could probably explain the benefits to you.




Now the really appeal of the EA Sports Poker Complex is in fact poker. Free poker that is. And as a card shark, I smell blood. Money blood of course.




Oooh these people are in for a good fleecing. They will not know what hit them!!




I....I lost everything. OH GOD HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN!! *sob* Where were all the colourful cards and the switches and the +4?? Huh?? What the hell is Uno!? We were playing a version of poker I've never seen. Texas Hold Them or something. Bawwwwwww!



My Apartment



*sigh*

Those bastards weren't kidding when they said they would take everything from me. It's gone. It's ALL gone.




Oh well. The most important thing is that they did not break my knees. The sun still shines brightly and there are more adventures to go on.




Here is the spaceship I won from the sheep finding game. Also with it is my PSPgo and my Mini-Destructoid Bot. Together we shall come back stronger and more powerful then ever before!!

Of course that will have to wait until next week when I go (PlayStation) Home for the weekend.


Sneak peak for whenever the next edition is:



LittleBigPlanet Custom Wallpapers from the LBP Space!! Woo!! The other one in the gallery works better on the PS3 though.