I have not had good interactions with mowfuckas (TPB J-Rock inspired) lately. Let me take you through just a couple of instances one by one before we get to recaps:
One of the best skate spots around here is under a bridge, which I also found out the hard way is killer on the ear drums - seriously consider bringing plugs next time. So a lone skate-hobo decided to claim his spot down there and he apparently lives there now. That's all well and good. I don't want to talk shit about the homeless. Well it would be kind of easy if not for the fact that he kept a fire going, all day and mind you this is summer/he wasn't cooking anything on it. He was just setting random garbage he found on fire in a garbage can, to be a dick. It smelled pretty bad and prevented me from some good warming up on the side of the park with the small manny pads before I went on to the higher ones. It seems like a minor complaint but it kind of ruined my session. Skating is all well and good and even in the blistering heat of summer or under an roaring, echoing bridge, but skating when there are newspaper fumes everywhere sucks. It feels like all the air inside of my lungs disappears and becomes an old datsun.
On top of that the guy was just rude, he flipped me off when I told him I didn't have any money then he kept trying to bum cigarettes off of me (which I don't carry as I don't smoke) and he came up with this bit that was humorously sad and aggravating at the same time. He said that he's the troll that lives under the bridge and there's a toll to skate here a cigarette or a dollar. It's kind of cute and maybe I'd give him the dollar had he not turned the park into an upper respiratory hazard. So he said I better bring something for him next time or he'll punch me in the "fucking" face. I didn't start anything but I feel like my response didn't have any show of cowardice, just disinterest. I really wanted the interaction to be over. I don't want to come off like an asshole though, haven't been back to that park next time I'll get him back just as long as he lets me skate in peace.
Scene B - More skateboarding. Last week an awesome company toured down by my state and they threw together a demo. It was great. But there was no shortage of awkwardness and dealing with angry people. Couple pointers if you ever go to a skate demo - I honestly didn't know as it was my first time getting shit signed. 1) Don't bother them while they're skating, even if it's after the demo. It's just rude. Consider them in "no autographs" mode if feet are on board or they're in the skate area. 2) Have the fucking sharpie cap open when you hand them your marker. (Also have markers!) I didn't know that and it wasn't till later I realized why forty different people asked me to take off the cap. Now I'm thinking why would they say that, can't they just do it themselves? Well they want the process to go by quicker. So they can get to the next autograph. So a ready sharpie means they can get an autograph done in a few seconds, or at least a few seconds faster. Finally 3) If it's not a "seated" signing where everyone is at a table and they make everyone line up prepare for bullshit. You will have to go all around looking for the Pros you want to get your shit signed by and it will be annoying and you will also probably miss a few. I ended up not getting about five that I wanted. Still had a good ”haul" though.
I honestly didn't know some of those rules, which makes me wish I went to a signing before this, of a similar type, but of a brand and team I didn't care as much about, just so I could pick up these rules and be ready for this one. Because I've been waiting for this one for years now. Anyway the shittiest thing that happened here was when I broke rule number two and pissed off someone who I was most looking forward to meeting. Did not get his signature that's for sure and I'll have a different approach next time around, whenever that may be. One thing you do learn though is who the chill people are. Some of the team riders were super amped to sign my deck and talk, others didn't give a shit about the pen cap thing and one dude already had a marker so you didn't need one. I forgot so he was my first autograph. Then I borrowed a sharpie off of some random guy at the place. Sharpies are key.
Scene C - And finally this bucket of shit. (Sorry for all the expletive by the way, I think I should get a pass for these stories though). No list of horrible human interactions experienced would be complete without a mass transit story. So it's a good friend's birthday, we ate at some fairly upscale place where you end up hungrier than what you paid for, by quite a bit. I'm coming home by subway and it's crowded, as usual. I don't notice at first because of headphones cranked up but I keep bumping into some guy sitting down. And apparently I had done this five times throughout the hour we were both there. The awful part is the guy has a crutch with him, presumably it's not a handicap but for a temporary thing like a broken bone or whatever. At exactly one stop before mine, he gets up and is inches from my face and his mouth moved. For that initial second I wanted to do the subway taking thing where you kind of notice someone or something happening but then ignore it because whatever. But it wasn't that simple he was talking to me, I just didn't hear him. Okay he wanted his space. He didn't curse or anything but he was clearly quite pissed. At like midnight on the subway coming home from drinking at a friend's birthday I'm not looking for trouble. I said sorry at least once and two times told him I'd move away so it wouldn't happen again. He sat back down. Awkwardness ensues. It was nice that the next stop was mine but I couldn't help but feel to have just accidently been a part of a "scene" in public. Next time I'm on the bus or train or what the fuck ever I'll be sure to nightcrawler it up and suction cup my ass to the ceiling. That way I won't bump for a second into anybody.
That was my last week. Dealing with all sorts of strange interactions. I'm actually hoping to see something top all of these. Maybe next week I'll be sitting in the last pew at church and for a single moment every last head will turn towards me and then back again.
No theme this week, only random pictures.
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/Forsakeneyes/my-dad-is-going-to-die-and-it-feels-good-to-feel-bad-296615.phtml][b]*[/b] - I hope some of you can take a moment to go read this article and leave something, Forsakeneyes is dealing with the type of problem that no one should have to go through.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/Occams/occam-thoughts-quagmire-296588.phtml][b]*[/b] - That dose of Occams you've been waiting for, it's here![/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/gajknight/better-with-age-a-journey-worth-retaking--296586.phtml][b]*[/b] - Gaj does that thing I like, which is screenshot blog-let's plays, in his entry for the better with age blogger's wanted assignment.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/StriderHoang/better-with-age-konami-s-legendary-mystical-ninja-296613.phtml][b]S[/b] - Strider dashes on by to tells us about ninjas and shit. Oh and to sell me on this game I kinda feel bad about missing out on now.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/CoruptAI125/looking-back-mass-effect-296601.phtml][b]A[/b] - It's always cool to see someone go back and replay one of their favorite games and try to critique it, hold it up to the great lenses of time and see if it aged well or not. This blog should've probably been under the "Better With Age" Banner :P[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/Adam+P/challenger-approaching-the-babes-of-bionis-296621.phtml][b]S[/b] - Adam P brings us another edition of his blog Challenger Approaching in which the challenger this time around is Xenoblade Chronicles characters.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/Virtua+Kazama/why-ports-matter-in-fighting-game-tournaments-lesson-1-version-differences--296616.phtml][b]A[/b] - Kazama is back to teach us more history on Fighting Games. Honestly I had to skim some parts as the technical detail go way way WAY over my head and I'm simply content with sitting in the comfort of my own home, facing a television screen and waggling a stick on my lap (for fighting games). But here Kazama talks about the honest to god importance of having the right version of a fighting game for a tourney.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/Flegma/grouping-wiimote-s-motion-pose-controls-296594.phtml][b]A[/b] - If you ever wanted to see a bunch of different Wii games categorized according to how they employ use of the Motion function, Felgma has you covered![/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/PStoid/pstoid-episode-27-because-he-s-german-296592.phtml][b]P[/b] - My Podcast did a thing, go check it out, or don't but you might miss out![/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/PS+FNF/ps-friday-night-fights-daken-can-suck-my-short-and-curlies-edition-296566.phtml][b]F[/b] - WE came WE saw WE CON-solequered!! - Playstation FNF.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/Lord+Spencer/wii-reviews-madworld-296582.phtml][b]R[/b] - Lord Spencer Reviews MadWorld, a game that I have heard so much about and wanted so badly but already abandonded any love for Nintendo and it's Wii by that point.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/Mike+Wallace/is-money-and-the-potential-fan-backlack-the-reason-half-life-3-doesn-t-exist--296622.phtml][b]T[/b] - Mike Wallace shares a video talking about Gaben's ultimate trump card Half Life 3 and some reasons it may not have been released yet. Personally I think it's time to move on.[/url]
[url=http://www.destructoid.com/blogs/CO+Jakyl/--296182.phtml][b]A[/b] - CO Jakyl shows us his art and a cool tool to make pixel art with.[/url]
No fails this week except for me!