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About Me
First and foremost, I'd say that I'm a quitter. I quit a lot of things. And the only things I don't quit I don't quit them because it would be harder if I did quit them.

Born on mischief night in the year 1984, I have gone on to fail to achieve many things and I hope to continue to do so until I fail to achieve everything. Hopefully, I will not fail in this. Or maybe I will. I don't know which one's better.

Upon receiving a bachelor's degree in film from Temple University, I returned to my homeland of Northeastern Pennsylvania utterly unsurprised that the only jobs available to me are telemarketing and assembly line work. Both of which I have failed at. Having lost my zest for almost everything, I seek solace in crafting intelligent and/or funny articles about gaming.

I won't hide the fact that I'm not good at games or maybe I just have gaming self esteem issues. In appetite, I'm certainly hardcore. I want to play as many games as possible and of every single genre available. In playing style, business casual. I'll turn off a game at the drop of a hat if I get disinterested or frustrated by it.

I own a Wii and an Xbox 360. I have no overriding preference for either. Bioshock was on one, Twilight Princess was on the other. In this way, they both have already made good on the financial investment.

I'm the Bus. Get on me. Please don't leave gum underneath my seats.
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Bus | 12:29 PM on 04.13.2008 9 comments


Shame. Disgust. Loathing. I'm not talking to everybody here. Many have said really inspiring, introspective, true things in the wake of N'Gai's comments on the trailer at hand. Many who dissented, did so in rational, respectful ways. If you fall into this group, I applaud you. I'm talking to those who turned on Croal viciously, ignorantly at the drop of a hat because of one disagreement. Here is a man who has repeatedly and consistently elevated the very essence of our mutual interest with reasoned and informed criticism time and time again. Apparently, up until just now. This man, seemingly well respected in gaming circles, is almost instantly abandoned by a nation of scared, defensive, pathetic individuals. Why? Because he's lying? Because he's deceitful or underhanded? Or maybe because he's just gotta prove that there's racism (or the appearance of racism) in that trailer or else he loses his membership in the black race? Or does he just see something that we might possibly never see? Either because we're white or we're from an area where racism isn't as prevalent or because we all know fully well that the black menacing figures in the trailer are zombies and only look like racial stereotypes.

But truthfully nothing's changed. He's still defending gaming. But now he's doing something far more difficult than rebutting a loon like Jack Thompson or shooting down ill informed Fox News correspondents. He's defending gaming from itself. From Japanese developers who don't know any better. From the incorrect assumptions of people who haven't played Resident Evil 1-4. Have no doubts about it: we live and play in a gated community and if that is to ever change we need to realize that the nature of a game is not common knowledge. You want video gaming to become a true art form? You really want that? Then, deal with some scrutiny and deal with it like an adult. Face it, react, learn, but don't attack. Doing so merely reveals how threatened you are and how small you've become.

Flags went up. "Here's another black guy, playing the race card, when will they stop this nonsense?" Right there, you've ceased to consider anything he has to say. You're not thinking of him as a person anymore but as a mouthpiece. Someone who doesn't feel, doesn't care, only does what they're programmed to do. Someone who isn't worth listening to. You have dismissed him. Utterly. And I don't think there's any crime against humanity that doesn't start with this crucial first step. Dehumanization.

I'm not here to talk about the trailer itself. Suffice to say, I agree with every single thing he had to say about it. However, I honestly feel that no internet discussion will ever convince a racist to abandon his ways. My own failings in this area were only fully realized when a good friend of mine pointed out how disgusting I truly was. I'm forever indebted to him and thus I know that it takes far more than a back and forth on some trivial issue with a group of strangers to change the nature of a man. So, in closing, all I truly ask for is faith. Faith not in some absolute infallibility of N'Gai Croal but in the belief that he is a good man and that his words always arise from a deep, abiding, and pure passion for gaming.

Title by Alex Bahr



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7 comments | showing # 1 to 7
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007's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2008 12:44
007
...
AML's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2008 12:58
AML
Well said.
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2008 13:40
Justice
@ AML
Well said.

Seriously you pretty much hit the nail on the head.
Tubatic's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2008 13:42
Tubatic
right on.
Bluefusion's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2008 14:17
Bluefusion
I love you.

"My own failings in this area were only fully realized when a good friend of mine pointed out how disgusting I truly was"

I had a similar experience. I didn't realize how many opinions and sub-conscious leanings I had were either racist or at the very least bigoted, until someone set me straight. Very subtle things I would never think of, like the desire to wash my hands after shaking a black person's hand. Even now, I guarantee I have some bigoted tendency somewhere in me.
boxhound's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/13/2008 20:28
boxhound
N'Gai Croal love videogames and if anything his comments should say that more than anything.

And it's nice to see fellow gamers face this subject like mature individuals instead of doing the typical hide under a rock (mom's basement) and hope this goes away on it's own.
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